Innocent in act

Chapter thirteen
Jayde POV
I couldn't breathe, it was like I just couldn't.
While I place my head on Hattie's ex-boyfriend's chest, I can hear the mad beating of his heart and I wonder if that's how it's supposed to be.
What happened the other time? I kissed Hattie's ex-boyfriend, it's clear.
But that wasn't mere kisses. We might have done more if Declan didn't bang at the door.
I don't know why I had to go ahead causing trouble for Hattie. This man was her past and it was supposed to stay like that.
Nothing of this was supposed to happen, not when I will be married in three days.
I feel so ashamed of myself now. How do I explain this to James?
I will rather not tell him anything. I will keep this to my grave.
Well, it's not entirely my fault. It was also his fault. He should have let me be when I asked him to.
I don't know why he had to shut the door.
And what happened the other time? Why couldn't the police take him? And how did he know Declan?
He pulls apart immediately and move to the driver's seat.
Then, I notice I'm almost naked. My shirt gown has been opened and has now exposed my breast.
I quickly button-up and look away, unable to bring myself to face him again. Not that he looks any different from how I look.
Then it came at me suddenly. I know this wouldn't be his first time having something like this with Hattie since he used to be her boyfriend.
"I need to go now," I break the silence that has suddenly stretched between us.
"It's late. Should I drop you off?" His voice was a bit hoarse.
" I can handle myself; I have always been doing so," I turn to look at him and realize he's looking everywhere but me, " How did you know Declan?"
He looks at me now and moves his tongue over his lower lip. The previous incident crept in and I shudder uncontrollably.
This is not happening to me. This is not happening! I can't believe I'm mesmerized already.
"Declan is my friend," he says and blinks once as if surprised I asked him such a question.
His friend? Wow! I don't believe that.
What am I expecting? Hattie ex-boyfriend is supposed to be someone very rich. I'm sure she wouldn't settle for less.
But why was she not allowed to marry him? I mean he's handsome and rich and also a friend to one of Ayles's billionaires.
Is there more Beatrice could want?
There's more to it, call it instincts but I feel I need to find out.
Or is he? My eyes narrow suddenly and I place my palm over my cheeks.
What if he's a sadist? Or what if he's rough sexually? Like what he did the other time.
Well, I shouldn't be thinking about that. If he's rough, then Hattie would be the one to decide.
It's not in Beatrice's place to answer that. It must be something else.
Gosh, I feel like I'm going insane.
"Hey, are you even here?" He asks and I blink once.
Gosh, I'm so tired. I need to rest my brain.
"I will just drive you home," he made to start the car but I held his hand.
"I can get home," I protest. What if James sees me? What if the maid sees a man drop me off?
Aside from the fact that I will be putting Hattie into trouble, I might create another problem for myself.
Anything I do might affect my one million dollars.
"I am driving you home and that's final!" He says so comfy with a voice that leaves no room for conversation.
I look away angrily. It's not that I have the right to get upset.
I just don't know why he had to ruin my night like this.
He even made me pay for a wine I was not going to take.
Well, Hattie has a lot of wines. I will just take one and get wasted.
We drive out of the bar. I didn't bother to look at him, I don't even want to.
Mere sitting so close to him is bringing out desires, feelings I never knew I had.
I've never had a boyfriend and I never thought of having one.
And well, no one wanted to be my boyfriend. I had no money to look nice or buy myself clothes.
The first guy that asked me out was Declan. And if he didn't say it the way he did, I might have innocently said a yes to him.
Gosh, I'm so ashamed of myself.
"Hey!" The guy says beside me. Then I remember I don't even know his name.
Well, I'm not supposed to know. The more I know about him, the more I feel attached. And I must prevent all that. I must severe any strings that can make way for trouble for me in the future.
This guy will be married and Hattie will be married too. And then, I will be back in the hole from where I came from.
I don't like the sound of that. I will be back in the world of enjoyment.
With my one million dollars, I will live the life I have always wanted.
I look up at the guy, his handsome face and his tempting lips, "Yes."
"Goodnight," he says, and looks past me. I follow the path of his gaze and I realize we are in front of Hattie's house.
Gosh, I've never felt so ashamed.
I didn't even know when we got home.
I open the door and get down. I look back and watch him drive away.
I stayed behind for a while because I don't want anyone to know someone drop me off.
Just like that, disasters have been avoided.
Though, I know the kiss will last longer in my heart.
The gate opens behind me suddenly.
I look back and my heart stands bolt upright in me.