Lesson 166- When you love someone, you forgive them, even if you can’t forget.

**RICHARD**
I climb out of the cab, yawning widely. I wave goodbye to the driver. It was strange, when I left the bar he was waiting out front. He said he was waiting for Lindy. I was of course immediately suspicious of him. But he seemed genuinely concerned about her so I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt. I told him that Lindy wouldn’t be leaving the bar just yet after all, and asked if he would be willing to give me a ride instead. The driver stared at me a moment then asked my name. When I told him, a curious smile crossed his face and he immediately agreed to drive me wherever I wanted to go. I had him take me to see a witch. Specifically, one who specialised in finding and tracking people. I asked the driver to wait for me while I spoke to the witch and I handed her a long brown hair that I had taken off of Lindy’s shoulder and told her I needed a tracking spell for it. The witch was very confused but half an hour and my entire savings account later, I had a map with a tracking spell. The witch seemed concerned that there were two markings on the map, but I wasn’t. One marking showed Lindy at the bar, the other showed her pelt. It’s a part of her, so of course the tracking spell shows it on the map. I was counting on it. 

Long story short, several hours later I stumble out of an old house, Lindy’s attackers are significantly worse for wear. I honestly didn’t intend to do as much damage as I did. It never occurred to me that the one guy wouldn’t be able to swim. Despite the severity of their injuries, I can’t bring myself to regret a thing. They deserved much worse. They’re lucky I’m no killer. Still, I have Lindy’s pelt and the relief I feel is immense. All I could think was that these monsters almost took her. Who knows how they would have used her. She’s worked so hard to maintain her freedom. I’ve watched for weeks as she creeps into the bar, terrified, but determined not to hide away from the world. Lindy is small and she has no idea how capable she really is, she has no idea how many amazing things are out there. But she’s going to find out one day, and I’m hoping I’ll be around when she does. Because someone like that, someone who so eagerly wants to live her life, who isn’t content with just surviving, she should never be constrained or hidden away. Luckily, the taxi driver was still waiting for me. I didn’t expect him to be there, particularly since my intrusion into the building just now was not legal or subtle. There was quite a bit of screaming involved. If I were driving a taxi, I wouldn’t want me in it. Instead, the driver just took one look at the pelt I’m still clutching tightly in my hands, then gave me a deep nod and told me to get in. He drove me straight back to the bar without even asking where I needed to go. I got out of the taxi and when I turned to ask about payment, he was just… Gone. What a strange guy. Still, I can’t worry about that right now. Holding onto Lindy’s pelt like the precious treasure it is, I march straight up to the doors of the bar and knock loudly. 

A moment later, the door swings open and Torin looks down at me. At first he seems irritated, but then he blinks in shock when he realises that I’m holding Lindy’s pelt. He makes a curious ‘huh’ sound then takes a step to the side to let me in. I spot Lindy on the far side of the room immediately and call out to her. 
“Lindy! Stop worrying and come here. I have your pelt!” I tell her excitedly. I expect her to be pleased, grateful even. Maybe after this she will finally be willing to hear me out. At very least she’s got to trust me a little more, right? What I don’t expect is how her worried expression suddenly smooths out, then she marches her way over to me, stops a few steps away then absolutely EXPLODES. She is in a complete panic. 
“You… YOU have my pelt? How the hell do you have my pelt? Oh shit. Do you know the men who attacked me? Are you working with them?”  She demands. Her expression is one of complete and total fear. Fear of me. My jaw drops in shock. I feel like she’s just kicked me in the gut. What did I do to deserve that? I was only trying to help, I saved her, I spent the whole night tracking down her pelt. I spent almost every dollar I had on that tracking spell and now she’s accusing me of conspiring with the assholes who wanted to enslave her? Lindy has always had a harsh attitude when it comes to me, but I’ve never minded it. Partially because I DID deserve it a bit. I endangered her friends, and partially because I enjoyed that she was singling me out. Even if it was just to glare at me. It’s more attention than she gives to anyone other than her friends. But this? This I don’t deserve and I refuse to stick around to hear it. Without a word, I just turn and walk straight out of the bar.

I make it about halfway down the street before I realise I’m still holding Lindy’s pelt. Damn it. I really don’t want to go back there. Not after what just happened. The worst part wasn’t that she yelled at me, it wasn’t even that she suspected me of being involved with those assholes. The worst part was that for the first time, she looked honestly afraid of me. I hated it. I never want to see that expression on her face again. But… She was scared, really, truly scared. Can I blame her for panicking? When I was trapped in a deal by Solem, I did things I definitely regret and I still had hope of escaping. I still had free will. I can’t imagine how terrified I would have been if I had no control over myself at all. So she lashed out at me. It hurt, it still hurts. But I shouldn’t have walked away with her pelt. It wasn’t my intention and she’s probably freaking out right now. With a sigh, I turn on the spot and head back down the street. 

I make it back to the bar and reluctantly knock on the door. This time I don’t feel proud or excited. Honestly, I feel lower than dirt. What kind of person am I that I can put in all this effort to help someone I care about and she just immediately suspects me? This time when Torin answers the door he looks… Almost sympathetic. Not something I expected to see from him. 
“Can I talk to L- Rina?” I change my mind at the last moment. I don’t need to see Lindy to return her pelt to her. She trusts Rina. I’m fairly sure she wouldn’t mind if I gave Rina the pelt to give to her. I’m sure she would rather it be in Rina’s hands than mine at the very least. Torin seems a little reluctant, but before he can say anything, Rina comes charging through the door.
“Richard, you got her pelt back?” Rina confirms and I nod, holding it out to her. Rina takes it from me immediately and strokes a hand over it. She sighs in relief. 
“Thanks. Look… I know Lindy… Didn’t react well just now. But thanks for bringing it back anyway. I know she wasn’t very kind to you, but when she calms down, she’s going to regret her actions. I hope that you’ll be willing to hear her out when the time comes.” Rina says with a sad smile. I frown, why does it feel like she knows something that I don’t? I sigh. I know I’ll probably forgive Lindy. I know that she’s a good person, even if she treated me badly this time. But I don’t think I’ll be hanging around here anymore. If Lindy really mistrusts me that much… Then she probably did mean it all those times when she told me she didn’t want me around. So I’ll finally listen and keep my distance. If only that decision didn’t hurt so damn much.