Chapter 191
I didn’t sleep that night.
Even after Jake had walked me back to my room, his touch still lingered on my skin, and my mind was a storm of emotions I couldn’t untangle.
What had we done?
What did it mean?
I lay in bed staring at the ceiling, my fingers grazing my lips, remembering the way he had kissed me in the lake.
He had pulled me close. Held me like he didn’t want to let go. Kissed me like I was something more than just the woman forced into his life.
But when we left the lake, he didn’t say much. He had been quiet, almost thoughtful, his gaze flickering toward me more times than I could count. I wanted to ask him what he was thinking, but I was afraid of the answer.
What if it meant nothing?
What if it had just been the heat of the moment?
I rolled over with a frustrated sigh. My body was exhausted, but my mind refused to shut off.
Somehow, I must have dozed off at some point because when I opened my eyes, the room was bathed in soft morning light. I was still tangled in the sheets, my heart still heavy with confusion.
A knock at the door startled me.
I sat up quickly, my pulse leaping. “Yes?”
The door creaked open, and to my absolute horror, Jake stood there.
For a second, neither of us spoke.
He looked… hesitant. As if he wasn’t sure what he was doing here either.
“I—” He cleared his throat. “I wanted to check on you.”
I blinked. “Check on me?”
He nodded, stepping inside and closing the door. “You left so quickly last night.”
Oh.
I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear, suddenly feeling incredibly exposed sitting in my bed while he stood there, looking impossibly put together despite the early morning.
“I was tired,” I lied.
His gaze flickered over me, as if he could see right through me.
“Ayla…” He sighed, running a hand through his hair.
My stomach tightened.
I had known this was coming. Of course, we needed to talk. We couldn’t just pretend nothing had happened.
I nodded, bracing myself. “Okay.”
He hesitated, as if choosing his words carefully. “What we did… I don’t regret it.”
My breath caught. I hadn’t expected him to say that.
“But I don’t know what to do with it,” he admitted. “With us.”
Us.
The word made my chest tighten.
I swallowed. “Neither do I.”
He exhaled, rubbing the back of his neck. “I wasn’t supposed to feel anything for you. That wasn’t part of the plan.”
I let out a short, breathy laugh. “There was a plan?”
He smirked slightly. “Not a very good one, apparently.”
For a moment, there was silence.
Then, carefully, he sat on the edge of my bed, closer but not too close. His presence alone was enough to make my skin tingle with awareness.
“I’m still figuring this out,” he said quietly. “And I don’t want to hurt you.”
I stared at him, my throat tightening. “Then don’t.”
His jaw clenched slightly, and I could see the war in his eyes.
“I can’t promise anything, Ayla,” he admitted. “I don’t know how to do this.”
I looked at him, really looked at him. For the first time, there was no coldness in his expression. No walls between us.
Just a man who was just as lost as I was.
“I’m not asking for promises,” I whispered. “Just… don’t shut me out.”
His gaze softened, and for a second, I thought he might reach for me. But instead, he just nodded.
And somehow, that was enough.
For now.
Jake stood slowly, glancing toward the window as if he needed to look anywhere but at me. “Breakfast is probably ready downstairs,” he murmured.
I nodded, watching him walk away. When the door clicked shut behind him, I exhaled a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding.
I didn’t know what we were.
But I knew I wasn’t ready to let go of whatever this was.
Later that morning, I found myself seated at the long wooden table in the main hall. The kitchen smelled like cinnamon and freshly baked bread, and the sounds of cutlery and casual chatter filled the space.
Jake was already there, sitting at the far end with his cousin Leo, who gave me a too-knowing grin the second he saw me.
I ignored it.
Instead, I sat between Clara and one of the older pack members whose name I hadn’t learned yet. Clara gave me a small smile and passed me a mug of tea.
“You look like you didn’t sleep,” she said softly.
“Thanks,” I muttered dryly, wrapping my fingers around the warm mug.
“Everything okay?”
My eyes flickered toward Jake involuntarily. He was talking, laughing even, but every so often, I’d feel his gaze brush against mine.
“I think so,” I whispered.
Breakfast passed in a blur of awkward glances and half-spoken words. By the time I was finished, I just wanted some air.
I stepped outside into the crisp morning. The forest smelled like pine and sunlight, and for a second, I closed my eyes, letting the calm settle in my chest.
“Ayla.”
His voice again.
Of course.
I turned slowly to find Jake a few feet behind me, hands stuffed into his pockets, eyes shadowed.
“Walk with me?” he asked.
I hesitated. Then nodded.
We didn’t speak for a long while. Just walked through the trees, the sounds of the forest our only company. Birds chirped high in the branches, and somewhere in the distance, I could hear the soft trickle of water.
“Did you mean it?” I asked finally, stopping beneath a wide oak tree.
Jake stopped too. “Mean what?”
“What you said earlier. That you don’t regret it.”
His brow furrowed slightly, but he nodded. “Yeah. I meant it.”
I studied him, searching for cracks, for lies. But all I saw was truth.
“I’m scared,” I admitted. “Of what this means. Of getting used to you and then losing it.”
Jake stepped closer, close enough that I had to tilt my head to look up at him.
“I’m scared too,” he said. “I didn’t expect you. I didn’t expect to care this much.”
I swallowed hard.
“Then what do we do?” I asked.
He reached for my hand this time, his fingers brushing mine before intertwining.
“We try,” he said. “Even if we’re figuring it out one step at a time.”
And as we stood there in the woods, fingers linked and hearts exposed, something inside me shifted.
Maybe we were still broken.
Maybe we were still healing.
But for the first time in a long time, I felt like I wasn’t alone in the dark anymore.
And that was a start.
Log in with Google Account
Chapters
Favorite
Settings
