Bonfire

*Sandra*

The pain I feel with the death of Jackson is eating me up inside. I know he led Tommasso off the path. He was meant to go back to the city, and he risked his life to protect the safe house. He was not supposed to even be here, and he risked his life to keep Jay from being killed. “Did he have family?” I asked Joseph as they covered him and loaded him into a vehicle to take him to the city. Joseph looked back at me and shook his head no. “None of us do outside of the brotherhood.” He looked like he might cry as well as we watched the vehicle pull away from the driveway. “How will we celebrate his sacrifice?” I asked quietly, walking closer to my king, “what do one of these ceremonies look like?” Joseph looked shook by the question, understandably, no one likes to deal with death. I guess I assumed these men were used to this, but I think they have more wins than losses in this department. “It will be a beautiful service, we will celebrate him as a hero, and then we will cremate him and spread him in the garden with the others.” His words sounded like they were coming from a distance though he stood right in front of me. “This is hard for you, I know, I am sorry King.” I reached him my hand and he gripped mine tightly, “The last time I did this type of service was with Mason.” He was speaking of his first brother, the one he grew and built with. I leaned into him and laid my head against his chest. We stood there for a few moments staring at the now empty driveway until we heard Jay in our comms telling us to come to the storm cellar.

When we walked in the cellar, all the brothers were in there. Zeus was standing in front with Jay, and the others behind him. Takara stood in the back, staring at him, but clearly afraid to walk forward. I had mentioned allowing her to kill him when we came in to learn she had snapped and stabbed Zeus. She had a level of fear that I felt would be solved with the power of taking out one of your abusers. Though it affected me deeply to take a life, when I killed Ryan, it truly gave me some of my power back. It isn’t a healthy way, I am sure, but it helped me. We don’t live the lives of people who heal the healthy way. I know I never really have. When the others realized Joseph had walked in, they parted the sea so he could get to the front. “Tommasso, you took a very special member from us today. Jackson was strong, loyal, and selfless. You will be prosecuted to the furthest extent of our laws. Murder of a member of the brotherhood results in total loss of life. Jay and Zeus will punish you for a while, and Takara will take your last breath. Then you will rise in a cloud of smoke and join your family in the afterlife.” His words gave me chills as he spoke to the man who killed Jackson. I can feel the wrong in what is happening here, but I can’t see how he didn’t earn it with all the destruction he has left behind him in his lifetime. He has reached the end his earthly existence has warranted.

After Jay hit him several times in the stomach and face, Zeus did the same. By the time Takara had made it up to do her part, I would be surprised if that man even knew where he was in the world anymore. I watched as she cried her eyes out while she screamed at him. “You are the whore!” Her voice was raw and in pain, and I was ready to pick her up once she needed me. Joseph looked over at me, and noticed something I hadn’t. I was shaking and crying. He pulled me to him and whispered in my ear, “are you okay?” I nodded yes but I wasn’t sure if I was. “Let’s get out of here darlin, you don’t need to see anymore.” He said quietly while wiping tears from my face. “I can’t leave her.” I gripped his hand and straightened my stance. She pulled the gun that was given to her up and pointed it at him. He opened his eyes as much as the swelling would allow and looked directly into her eyes. I watched as she pulled the trigger and released the weight that had been holding her down. He fell backwards, dead instantly, and Takara fell to her knees. She was sobbing. I released Joseph’s hand and walked over to her. “C’mon Tay, they can’t hurt you anymore.” She grabbed my hand as I pulled up on her and walked her through the men and out of the cellar. She sobbed and held close to me, and I spoke to her softly. “I know what this feels like, and it will get easier. If you hadn’t of shot him, if the world was reversed, God only knows what he would have done to you.” I continued to talk, and she continued to cry. “It’s going to be okay.”

After I got her to the porch, we sat on the swing and watched as the others pulled him from the cellar. The guards had made a bon fire in the yard, where we would roast marshmallows on a normal night. Jay and Zeus threw him into the fire, and they all stared as his body burned in the flames. Joseph was breathing deeply, watching with his men as the enemy became nothing but ash. I watched his body reacting to the emotion that was rushing though him as I sat on the holding my friend. I couldn’t race down to be with him, and to be honest, I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to smell what I knew the air smelled like down there. I wanted to sit here, at a distance, taking care of the woman who just killed one of her monsters. She finally stopped sobbing and sat up straight on the swing. ‘Am I going to hell?” Her words broke me, I hadn’t thought of any of this that way. I looked over at her, seeing the conflict in her mind, and smiled. “He was a devil. He was evil. All you did was send him back to hell.” She nodded at me because like Ryan, that made sense to her. Where I had seen the darkest parts of Ryan, Takara had seen the darkest parts of those Italian men. They all hurt her. What she did would be wrong to many, but in this life, she was right.

We sat there for quite a while watching the blaze, Takara and I. She was calm now, still in shock, but calm. Joseph walked up on the porch and leaned against the banister. “How are you ladies?” His voice was calm as well. “I think we are better boss.” He nodded, looking from me to Takara. When Henry walks up on the porch, he reaches out for Takara’s hand, “Let’s go get you cleaned up Tay.” Hearing him call her by that endearing name comforted me somehow. I smiled at him, this young man I have chosen as my youngest brother, and he smiled back. Takara thanked me and stood up walking to take his hand. Joseph asked me what I wanted to do, and I patted the space beside me on the swing. He walked over slowly and sat down where I was patting. “It’s been a rough one today. You sure you still want to marry me??” I looked over at him and smiled, “Take me to bed, take away the pain.”