Chapter 17

Lilly
4 more days later
I could hear people talking. I couldn’t make out the words but I could hear voices. I wanted to ask them to be quiet. I was really tired and just wanted to sleep. I tried to open my eyes to see them but I couldn’t do it. I tried lifting my hand but it felt so heavy I gave up. The voices were getting louder like someone was yelling. Someone sounded very mad. What was happening? Who was talking? I feel like I should know the angry voice but I could place it. Maybe a little more rest and I would be able to figure it out. Yea, I just needed some more rest.

I don’t know what woke me this time but I feel like I’m choking. I started to gag and cough but it wouldn’t go away. I was starting to panic. I can’t breathe. I wanted to yell. Why can’t I breathe? I coughed some more. I tried gasping for air but couldn’t. I wanted to grab my throat but my arms wouldn’t move. Why can’t I move? What’s happening to me? I heard a rapid beeping noise? What’s that? Then a hand on mine. Who is touching me? Why can I feel them but I can’t move? Then a voice whispered in my ear. “ It’s alright, Lilly. We are going to help you? Don’t be scared.” I know that voice. It is a man's voice. It has brought me comfort before. But who is it? I heard another voice. A woman I think but I don’t know. “ I’ve got you Lilly. It is going to be alright in just a minute. Uncle Ace has got you but we need you to calm down.” Calm down. I can’t breathe. Wait,Uncle Ace? What is he doing here? Wait where am I? What is that loud beeping? “ Just listen to my voice, Little bit.” ‘ Little bit’ is what he always calls me. “ That’s it. You are almost there. You will breathe easier in just a second.” Breathe. Yes, I was choking. But I don’t feel like that right now. Did someone help me? I can breathe again. I try to take a deep breath. Oh, shit. That hurts.” There you go. That’s better. I have got you. It’s going to be alright now.” Ace says. I notice the beeping has slowed.

“ Lilly, my name is Marienna. I’m your nurse tonight. You should be breathing better now that we took out your tube.” Nurse? Tube? What is happening to me? “ Lilly I’m going to look you over and ask you some questions, ok? I wanted to say ok but could get my mouth to move. She opened my eyes and shined a light in them. I wanted to close my eyes, the light was so bright but she had to do it for me. She opened my mouth and I guess looked in it because she said “ It doesn’t look like the tube did any damage to her throat. Just a slight irritation but that is normal. It will go away in a day. So that is good.” Was she talking to me or Uncle Ace? “ Lilly, can you move a finger for me?” I tried. I really did but nothing. But the nurse didn’t seem to be bothered by it. “ That’s ok. We can again try later.” I felt something move at my feet. “ Lilly, how about moving your toes?” Still nothing. I felt something wet slide down my cheek. Am I crying? “ Shush, it is ok, little bit. Just rest. You can try later.” Ace says and wipes my cheek.

Yes, maybe rest is a good idea. The nurse says “ I’ll let the doctor know about her progress. He will do a more thorough exam.” I hear her leave. Doctor? Nurse? Oh, man, my head hurts. I really need some sleep. Before I doze off I hear Ace talking “ Yea Prez. She is breathing on her own now.” A pause. Is Ace on the phone with Viper? Why? “ No, she didn’t respond to commands this time. But I think she can hear us and understands.” Another pause. “ Because she started crying.” Then nothing. “ Yea, Viper. I got her. She won't be alone.”

I knew I was in and out of it for a while but had no time frame to work with. I would hear voices. Some I could make out some I couldn’t. Some I recognized, some I didn’t. I would feel someone hold my hand or brush my hair out of my face but I still couldn’t move. I know a doctor came in and asked me to do things like move my fingers and toes but just like before, nothing. I’m so frustrated. I want to ask what the hell was going on? I want to know what happened to me. I figured out that I’m in the hospital because of the doctors and nurses. But how did I get here? What happened to me?

I hear raised voices. Three voices, all male. And very loud. They sound frustrated, angry, and something else I can’t place. “ It’s been six days since you took her breathing tube out. You said once you stopped the medication it should only be a day or two. Why isn’t she awake yet?” Who is that? I know him. Why is he yelling? Wait six days? What are they talking about, six days. Six days! “ Lilly is recovering from some very serious injuries. We have to give her time. Her breathing on her own is a big step. We are doing everything we can for her. But the rest is up to Lilly.” I guess the doctor said, Injuries? What happened to me? I want to scream, yell. I want answers. I feel my cheeks getting wet. I know I’m crying again. Please somebody tell me what is going on? I want answers damn it! Tell what is going on. Don’t talk about me like I’m not here. I’m right here. I can hear everything. Talk to me!

“ Brothers, look.” I know who that is. It’s Goof. Goof is here. Now I am crying harder. I guess that got their attention. Next thing I know I have the doctor asking me questions and someone wiping my tears. “ Lilly? It’s Dr. Ryans.” I know him. He treated me when I was rescued from the Reapers. He was nice to me. I feel someone grab my hand. “ Lilly, can you squeeze my hand?” I try as hard as I can. Ha, I don’t move much but it moves. I squeezed his hand. “ Good Lilly.” He says. Someone grabs my other hand. “ Lilly, can you squeeze this hand?” I did it again. Not much but I did it. I can move! “ That’s great Lilly.” He sounds so happy. Hell, I’m happy. I’m starting to move. “ Ok. Now I want you to try to lift your arms for me?” I try but am only able to lift my hands a little bit before they feel like they are being weighed down by a ton of bricks. Now I am frustrated again. Why is this so hard? I used to do this all the time. Why is it so hard now? But Dr. Ryans soothes me.” It’s ok Lilly. You are doing great.” I am? It doesn’t feel like it.

“ Lilly, I’m going to move your blanket. I want you to try to wiggle your toes.” he says. I feel them move. Yes. I hear Goof say. “ Yes, Lilly. You are doing it.” He sounds so excited I want to laugh. I hear another voice, gruff this time say, “ You need to get here now.” he says with urgency. What’s that about? I don’t have time to think right now because Ryans is asking more questions. “ Lilly, I know you must be getting tired but we just have a few more things to check. I want you to try to open your eyes.” I feel my eyelids flutter like they want to open. I manage to open them just a bit before the bright light hits them and I slam them shut. “ Dim the lights.” Ryans yells. “ Lilly, I’m going to open your eyes and have a look. It is going to be bright. I’m sorry about that but It is important that you try not to close your eyes.”

He does what he says and the light is so bright it hurts. I see the light move but that’s it. I can’t make out faces or anything around me. I don’t like it. He lets my eyes go then says “ Last thing for now Lilly. I want you to try to speak to me. Just one word is all I ask.” I open my mouth to say ‘ Hi’ but all that comes out is a squeak. “ Here” Ryans says and puts an ice chip in my mouth. Oh, wow. That feels great. It cools the fire in my throat. After a minute Ryans asks me again to try to talk. I manage a very squeaky ‘ Hi’ I think. It didn’t sound like hi to me but he was excited about it. “ You did good Lilly. Real good. I want you to rest for a bit. I’ll be back later to check on you.” I want to smile. I think I do but before I know it I’m asleep again.