Chapter Eighty Three
Lincoln
“You have to understand that in order to make it believable, Jax and Raleigh have to outwardly be just as you two have always been,” Dal rushes to say.
My stomach sinks at is words because that means…
He’s kissed her.
He’s touched her.
He’s…
“No!” I shout with a shake of my head. “I’ll take his place now that I’m out and *I* will protect her.”
“But, Lincoln, honey, you need to take care of yourself first,” Ashlynn says, turning around from the front passenger seat to look at me, her face filled with compassion and understanding.
My pulse skyrockets, my heart nearly beating out of my chest I’m so angry.
Balling my hands into fists against my thighs, I squeeze them tightly enough that my neatly trimmed nails bite into the skin of my palms, stinging slightly but right now, I welcome the sting.
The remainder of the drive is made in silence as thoughts and images of what my brother and my girl are getting up to together run through my mind like a bad movie.
*Jax has her pinned against the fence beneath the bleachers, his hands roaming until they find their way into her pants.* It’s like I’m watching from the sidelines as he fingers her to orgasm.
*Raleigh is on her knees outside of the fieldhouse, choking on Jax’s cock as he fucks her pouty little mouth. His hand is buried is her hair and she has tears sliding down her cheeks as her drool coats his cock. Then I hear, “That’s it, baby.” He glides two fingers of his free hand down her cheek before tucking them under her chin to lift her face so that she’s looking up at him. The change in angle allows him to sink deeper into her throat, just as a low groan makes its way up his. He’s fucking her face so hard that I can actually her the slapping sound of his pelvis hitting against her. After a few moments, Jax growls, “Fuck, I’m so close. I can’t hold back. I’m going to cum!” She wraps her hands around his thighs, holding him tighter to her as he stills and cums down her throat.*
Squeezing my eyes tightly closed, I lean forward and rest my head against the back of the seat, desperate for the scenes playing out in my head to stop.
“I can’t do this…” I whisper, my heart breaking and my stomach turning as I continue to be tortured by scene after scene of Jax and Raleigh together in one manner or another.
The entire drive home, it’s one scene after another constantly tormenting me. Extreme nausea hits me the longer that I’m plagued by the two of them together to the point that I’m sweating and shivering as I try to not vomit in Dad’s ride.
Cant help but think that he would not be happy with me and probably make me clean up the mess if I did end up getting sick in here.
“You okay there man?” Bos asks from next to me as we pull into the driveway.
I just shaking my head back and forth in answer and as soon as the car comes to a stop, I’m out the door and letting the little bit of breakfast that I’d managed to eat out into the grass in the front yard.
When nothing else comes up, I stay bent over for a few moments, waiting to make sure that I actually am done before standing to my full height and making my way into the house. Quickly, I make my way up the stairs and to the bathroom to brush my teeth and wash the taste of vomit out of my mouth.
What I don’t expect are the feelings of unease that hit me as I come upon the door to the bathroom where I almost made a mistake that I wouldn’t have been able to take back or gotten a second chance to fix.
There’s a new unpainted door put up in the place of the old one. The shower curtain that had been in there has been replaced too.
*Exactly what all happened that night?* I wonder. At the sound of footsteps coming up behind me, I turn to find Bos and Aspen coming down the hall.
Aspen gives me a sad smile when I glance at her.
When I turn my attention to Bos, he must be able to read the confusion on my face because he begins to fill in the blanks for me.
“After you…you passed out. I guess you fell and somehow managed to take the shower curtain and rod down with you. Jax ended up having to bust the door down in order to get to you. When he found you, Christ…”
He stops speaking for a moment as his voice gets hoarse and his eyes redden and fill with tears. After a bit, he sniffs, shakes out his shoulders and wipes at his eyes, pretending that he wasn’t just on the verge of tears as he continues, “There was blood everywhere man. When he carried you down those stairs, I didn’t think you were breathing. I-I completely lost it—”
Turning in his arms, Aspen cups his face in her small hands so that she has his full attention when she says, “You panicked, your brother, your quad, someone you share a bond with that few others can understand, was unconscious and bleeding. Your reaction is justified and completely understandable.”
Feeling like complete and total shit for everything that I put everyone through, I hang my head as shame washes over me and mutter, “I am so sorry.”
“No!” Bos growls. A second later he pulls me into him and wraps his arms around me and as stupid as it sounds, it feels so fucking good to be hugged by someone right now. “You have nothing to apologize for. You were going through some shit and I failed you by not realizing how bad it was but I should have known.”
I wish I could believe him but I know that I have some atoning to do, to practically everyone in my life.
And that starts with getting my ass to Rhydell high and putting my mind at ease about shit going on between two people who I *know* would never betray me like that but what my heart knows and the insecurities that like to kick me when I’m down are two completely different things.
“Thank you,” I mumble with a nod of my head.
“I love you, never forget that. When the thoughts get too intrusive, always remember that you have people who love you and do not want to be a part of a world that doesn’t have you in it.”
I feel the tell-tell burn of tears at the back of my eyes at his words and begin to blink rapidly to try to keep them at bay.
Noticing, Bos smirks and with a clap of his hand on my shoulder he asks, “You okay there, Linc?”
“Yeah, sure, just got something in my eyes is all.”
“*Something in your eyes.* Yeah, sure. Of course.” Then, stepping back, he pulls Aspen back into his arms and nods towards the bathroom. “Get yourself cleaned up and go see your girl. I’m sure she’s missed you.”
Log in with Google Account
Chapters
Favorite
Settings
