Fenrir’s state of vulnerability

Fenrir's POV



I continued to kneel to submit at the foot of the bed, my knees turning sensitive from coming in full contact with the cold floor, not that I even noticed or cared. I didn't know what to do, or what to even say at that moment, a lot of confusing things went through my head. I just stayed there, locking gazes with the hazel-eyed goddess in my bed.



Ahh, Marsai…

If only she knew exactly the main thing that was going through my mind right now if only she knew how much I wanted to express my happiness right now.



Deep happiness, that I'm not quite sure words can explain well enough.



Great heavens above! The relief, the joy, the satisfaction of knowing that I, Fenrir Amarok, was her mate. Marsai's mate, and that she had confirmed it in front of all those naysayers that she called friends.

Marsai was mine, she knew it and even the heavens knew it. She was mine since the beginning of time, she was my mate and my wife and the heavens knew how much I wanted to scream it out right now, to tell her that.

My eyes roamed her face. She looked quite confused right now and I don't even blame her.



I was just as confused once, when I questioned myself over the fact that for some reason, I just couldn't ever bear the thought of Marsai just being far away from me. Even after her defiance, insults, and hurtful words, I always try to make sure every single step she takes is ensured with the utmost safety.



I could feel slight fear creeping in, clutching my insides, turning them cold. I could not lose her, Heavens above…if I lose Marsai…I'd…No, I couldn't. I just wouldn't be able to bear it.

I longed to tell her just how desperate I am to keep her, to make sure she's always by my side. because truthfully…Marsai is the only one I have in this entire world.



And wish to heaven that she knew that. Maybe if she did, she would…she might just understand…

Marsai is the closest person to me in this world, and it doesn't matter whether we fight or not, it is true. She was the only person that could openly defy me and ignore my commands and I, instead of giving up and pushing her away to get the punishment she deserved, I will still, amidst the great anger she usually stirs within me, find myself yearning for her, trying to bring her closer, thinking of her…. letting her invade my thoughts.



Deep down, something keeps on telling me this…maddening attraction to her has grown far beyond fondness.

Marsai has grown so much on me, that I cannot imagine a day without her. I finally admitted to myself that I could not live without Marsai.



Marsai's POV



I have been staring at him and he just stared back. I kept wondering why he was still kneeling there, naked on the floor and why he wasn't saying anything. In fact, I wondered why he was kneeling there in the first place.



I also couldn't say anything because I didn't know what to say either, I was just confused as to what exactly was happening. What would I say to a naked man that his whole body was calling to me like some magnet?



Mind you, the silence wasn't as awkward as one would imagine. I mean, at least not for me who was trying hard not to look at Fenrir's exposed body right now,… I can't believe I just confessed that…



It's not my fault, though. It's just that Fenrir looks so….so good looking right now, It's extremely distracting.



I mean, just take a look at him… his chest is so broad and manly, his skin is firm and smooth. Not to mention his biceps, abs….ohh…and the way the pale sunlight that managed to penetrate the bedroom window was displaying on his skin, giving it a kind of glow, and just to look down at his…



Whoa, Marsai!…what has gotten into you? I honestly didn't know. I think it has something to do with the mate bond, the enchantment of the mate bond is just making Fenrir look so…so irresistible right now. Because I don't think that on a normal day, I would say or think of him this way. My eyes couldn't stop taking in every detail of his being. I don't think I've ever noticed just how dark his hair was, it was a midnight black. His eyes were so strange and intriguing, a smoky grey that looked like the weather before a thunderstorm.

I removed my eyes from his body, reluctantly. Hoping he doesn't notice my stares because I just—

"Marsai" I looked up to his downcast face as I wondered what he was going to say and why he called my name. "Marsai, I…. you can't leave me"



I…huh?



I don't think I understand what he just said…"Wait, what?" I had to ask.



He looked deeper into my eyes, his grey eyes staring unblinkingly. "You heard me," he said. "You're not allowed to ever leave me. Ever."



Now, if it was…before, I would have defied his words without even trying to understand. I would have tried to make it clear that he does not own me, that I'm not his to keep and order…but that was because, before he would have said this with a commanding voice, like the tyrant I believe he was, but right now, he wasn't saying it as an order but…like a plea. He wasn't looking like a dictator laying out his rules, but like someone who was begging for the one, they loved not to leave them….



"Why?" I asked with sudden curiosity. "Why do you say that I can't leave you?"



He heaved a sigh before he continued, "Because…if you leave me….I'm afraid I might become a monster," his eyes glimmered with unshed tears and I felt my heart clutch. I hadn't expected him to be so….honest.

The Fenrir I thought I knew wasn't weak or emotional. But this Fenrir right here was showing me all his insecurities and fears.



"Because if you leave me, I'm afraid I might become a monster…" his words kept echoing in my head as I stared at him. So he also believed that I could calm his rage as well?



The scene at Rudolph's house began to play in my mind. It was obvious that calmed him there, just when he was about to attack like a real monster.



I moved from the bed and started to wiggle my way down. Undoubtedly, Fenrir's actions and words pricked at my heart. He looked so vulnerable…

When I stood before him, I gave him my hand. He looked slightly shocked at the gesture and I suddenly realized it was the first time I'm doing something other than defying him.

Gingerly, he took my hands and I helped him up. Trying hard to control myself against looking…down.

It was when he stood before me, towering over me and staring at me with his smoky grey eyes, did I finally notice a tingling sensation in my nose.

No, it wasn't an itch….it was…heavens! What was that scent??

My nose had picked up a scent, something extremely intoxicating and arousing. I looked hard at Fenrir and noticed…it was coming from him.



Heavenly spirits above! Was this…was this the mate scent? I mean, why was it so powerful all of a sudden. It smelt like…like all the goddamn good things in life.



Driven by the heavens knows what, I decided to take a step forward. I wasn't scared anymore but I was a little hesitant…and I don't exactly know why. Was it because, barely an inch of a step closer to him I had already begun to sniff at his skin? I know, it's embarrassing! Extremely weird…but…I couldn't help it.

I could swear, whatever it was, it was so irresistible. My nose moved on its own, touching down on his skin as it did so.