Book 2 Chapter 5
They went upstairs after breakfast. The villa was still and quiet, the only sound was the faint hum of the sea outside and Loki's noisy breathing as he trailed behind them on the stairs.
When they reached the bedroom, Ioannis didn’t say much, he just watched her with those quiet, observing eyes of his. Yalda sat on the edge of the bed, she didn't lie down just yet for fear that she was throwing up, she'd been trying so hard to not give into the nausea and bring back what little food she'd had during breakfast.
“Are you comfortable?” he asked, noticing she was seated stiffly at the edge of the bed.
She nodded faintly. “Yeah."
He pulled the curtains halfway, letting in enough light to keep the room from feeling shut in.
"Are you going to lie down?" He asked.
She nodded once more.
"I will. I'm just catching my breath." She murmured. "Are you going to the office?"
He shook his head.
"No, you're stuck with me." He said, attempting to be humorous. But Yalda felt bad, of course she did. She was sure he had better things to do than staying back to babysit the girl who'd left him without looking back.
"I can look after myself while you're out, you know." She said. "You don't have to cancel your plans because of me."
"I know you can look after yourself." He said blowing out a breath. "Don't worry about anything. Just rest."
Rest....
She wasn't even sure what that was anymore. It wasn't like she was physically tired, she hadn't done anything after all, so why did she need to rest? She'd been doing nothing for the past 3 months so she wasn't sure what she needed was rest.
"That's all I've been doing for three months." She told him quietly.
He seemed to think about it for a moment before he nodded. He made his way over to the bed and sat beside her.
"What do you want to do then?" He asked her.
And it was the worse question he could have asked because Yalda had no idea what she wanted to do. She didn't even have the will to do anything, she was mainly just existing.
"I don't know." She replied rubbing her temple wearily. "I'm sorry."
"That's alright." He responded immediately. "Would you like to go swimming? Or read a book or something? We could go out and get some air if you want, it'll make you feel better."
She once would have been more than glad to do all that, but right now, she had no interest in doing anything at all. She lowered her gaze from his as her shoulders sagged dejectedly.
He studied her for a moment, he could see that she wasn't interested, but he didn't give up just yet.
"We could get fresh vegetables from the garden and cook something with Alina." He suggested knowing cooking had a way of relaxing her.
The nausea kicked in once more at the mention of food and Yalda had to hold her breath tos stop herself to gagging and throwing up.
Everything was overwhelming; Ioannis's kindness, the grief, the pregnancy, the nausea, the dizziness. Everything was too much, she felt like she was bottling too much and she couldn't do it anymore, she spoke before she had a chance to think it through.
“I’m pregnant.” she said quietly.
Her heart thudded heavily before it skipped a beat. She hadn’t meant to say it, at least not like this, not without thinking it through first.
She stared down at her restless hands unable to meet his gaze. A brief moment of silence settled before he spoke at last.
“Pregnant?” Ioannis’s voice was low, almost unreadable.
She nodded slowly. “Yes.”
The word seemed to hang between them. When she finally forced herself to look up, he was watching her, not in shock exactly, but in what seemed to be disbelief, like he was still processing what she had told him. His dark eyes raked over her face, searching, and then down to her body as though searching for a sign.
Yalda’s chest tightened, she could hardly breathe at all.
“I thought you should know.” she said quietly.
It was bad enough that he had to deal with her, but would he be okay with dealing with another's baby?
For a heartbeat, she expected him to turn away, but he didn’t. Rather, his eyes softened as he reached out and pulled her into his arm for a comforting hug.
“That’s beautiful,” he said against her hair. "Look at you, you'll be a mom soon."
Yalda froze. She didn’t know how to react. He almost sounded like he was proud of her for being pregnant.
“I’m happy for you,” he added. “Truly.”
Her lips parted, but no sound came. She wasn’t sure what she’d expected, but this certainly wasn't it.
“Ioannis…”
He pulled back just enough to look at her. “You’re carrying a life, Yalda. That’s never anything less than a miracle.”
Her eyes burned suddenly. She tried to look away, but he didn’t let her.
"Talk to me, why aren't you excited?"
“I don’t know if I can do this,” she answered quietly, her voice was trembling from the emotion swirling in her chets. “I don’t even know if I should.”
“Why not?”
Wasn't it obvious?
“Because I can barely take care of myself,” she replied. “I’m not ready. Ioannis, I don’t even think I’m a good person."
Ioannis listened without interrupting, his hand still rested against her cheek. And it was only when he was sure she was done talking before he spoke.
“You will be,” he said. "I know it."
She shook her head, her tears were beginning to streak down her face now. “You don’t know that.”
“I do,” he said. “Because you love that child already, don’t you?”
Her breath caught. She looked up at him through her tears. “I do,” she admitted, barely a whisper. “I love it more than anything, but I'm scared.”
He shook his head.
"There's no need to be scared,” he said. “Love is always enough to begin with, and I will be with you every step of the way."
Something in her chest cracked open, she pressed a trembling hand against her lips, trying to contain the sob that rose, but it broke free anyway. Ioannis pulled her back into his arms, his palm rubbed her back soothingly.
“Breathe,” he murmured. “Just breathe.”
Yalda clung to him, her tears wet the fabric of his shirt but like always, he didn't seem to mind.
"I'm so lost." She cried quietly. "I don't know what to do."
He reached down so his hand against her abdomen lightly. “This is good news, Yalda,” he murmured. “A life is always good news.”
Her throat closed up again. “I wish he were here,” she croaked. It was probably insensitive to say that to him but she couldn't help it.
Ioannis nodded slowly. “I know. And he would’ve been proud of you.”
The words shattered her. Tears welled up again, spilling down her cheeks in hot streaks.
He let her cry, holding her the entire time. He didn’t fill the silence with platitudes or empty promises, he just held her comfortingly.
And when her breathing began to even out again, he finally spoke.
“You’re going to be fine,” he said quietly. “I’ll make sure of it.”
She blinked up at him, unable to speak.
“I’m going to take care of you and the baby if you’ll let me.”
She felt so bad that she'd once again brought her baggage into his life. He deserved to be loved by someone who didn't toil him so much, someone without so much issues.
“Ioannis...."
“Don’t argue,” he interrupted gently but firmly. “You need rest, stability, and safety. All of which I can provide.”
She let out a shaky breath, she didn't know what else to say.
For a long moment, neither of them spoke. The sea wind slipped through the window, carrying the faint scent of salt and jasmine. Yalda’s heartbeat began to slow, syncing unconsciously to the steady rhythm of his.
When he finally stepped back, she was a lot calmer.
“Go get dressed.” he said.
She blinked. “For what?" She asked quietly.
“We’re going to the hospital.” he replied. "We'll get you checked and ensure you're all good."
Yalda hesitated, still trying to process the weight of everything that had just happened. Then she nodded. “Okay.”
"Take care your time."
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