Book 2 Chapter 6
The clinic sat on a quiet, palm-lined street in an upscale Athens suburb. For some reason, It didn’t look like a hospital but like a modern art gallery made of white marble and glass. But inside, the scent of disinfectant and the soft hum of medical machines gave it away.
It sucked Yalda all too quickly, it reminded her of how sick Alexander had been when she had returned to New York, and it broke her heart of course. Ioannis must have senses her unease because he had squeezed her hand reassuringly.
Dr. Eleni Petrova, a woman with silver hair and sharp blue eyes, set the ultrasound wand back in its cradle after using it on Yalda. The screen beside Yalda went dark, erasing the small, flickering image that had kept both her and Ioannis silent for the past few minutes.
“Three months,” Dr. Petrova said calmly, checking the printout. “The baby is strong, developing well. It has a steady heartbeat.”
Yalda didn’t move at all, her hands rested on her lap stiffly, she didn't know whether or not to smile. It was good news, most certainly, but why did she feel so lost?
“But,” the doctor continued, her tone turning more serious, “we need to talk about you, Yalda.”
Yalda's breath faltered as she flipped through the report and looked up.
“Your results show severe anemia, low ferritin, and vitamin D deficiency. You’re malnourished and exhausted. Your body is fighting to keep up, but it’s struggling. You also mentioned insomnia, loss of appetite, and low mood. These are all signs of major depression.” Dr. Petrova explained.
Yalda let out a shuddering breath. She didn't even know how to respond at the moment. She knew she was depressed after all, and she knew she hadn't been feeding properly so she wasn't surprised she was malnourished, though it was embarrassing.
Ioannis leaned forward, his jaw set. “What’s the risk?” he asked.
Dr. Petrova met Yalda’s gaze though all Yalda wanted to do was look away.
“The risk is miscarriage, Yalda. A serious one. You need to rest, eat well, and take your supplements. But more than that, you need emotional support. I strongly recommend therapy. You need to take care of your mind as much as your body.” She said.
Yalda looked at the vase of hydrangeas in the corner, the vivid blues and purples seemed too bright for the sterile room, it distracted her but not enough. She gave a small nod, still unable to say anything. She looked like someone who had given up before the fight even began and she couldn't help it.
Ioannis spoke again. “We’ll follow every instruction, Doctor. The supplements, the diet, everything. Please recommend the best specialist for both prenatal and psychological care.”
“I will do just that, you have nothing to worry about." Dr. Petrova said, glancing at Yalda one more time. “You have to want to get better, Yalda. For yourself, and for the baby.”
Yalda nodded again, she knew that, she knew that so much. Riley has said it countless times and she knew she was right. But then, did she want to get better? Did she want to let go of the pain? Did she want to let go of Alexander?
~~
The drive back to the villa was silent. Ioannis’s Bentley glided down the coastal highway, the soft hum of the engine filling the thick air between them.
Ioannis didn’t speak. His hand rested on the steering wheel, his jaw was clenched tightly, and his thoughts were a tangled mess. The doctor’s words echoed over and over again in his head: Malnourished, depressed, risk of miscarriage.
He had known Yalda was going through a lot at the moment, but he hadn't thought it had gotten to her so much. It was almost killing her at this point.
He stole a glance at Yalda, she was leaning her head against the window, staring blankly outside. The sunlight traced her face in gold, but she looked far away, lost somewhere he knew he couldn’t reach.
He couldn’t stand the silence anymore, it was making him lose his mind.
“Yalda,” he said quietly.
“Hm?” she answered, not looking away from the window.
“About the therapy, will you go?” he asked gently, knowing this was a sensitive topic. He didn't want to push or pressure her.
“No.” she replied.
The answer was immediate and final. He wanted to argue, to reason with her, but he knew it would only push her further away.
“Alright,” he said. “Let's focus on healing your body first. We’ll talk about this some other time.”
She nodded slowly, and for a moment, he thought she wasn't going to respond, but then she spoke quietly:
"Thank you."
But he didn't want her gratitude, he just wanted her to get better, to be fine, to go back to being the vibrant person he knew she could be.
The rest of the drive was quiet, and when they arrived at the villa, Ioannis led her upstairs to the bedroom. Sunlight streamed through the tall glass windows from where he'd parted the curtains earlier.
Yalda walked straight to the window and drew the curtains, it was too bright and she felt too exposed. She stood there for a moment longer, staring at nothing in particular, the exhaustion was written all over her. Ioannis stayed near the doorway, he watched her shoulders begin to tremble slightly.
He didn’t say anything, he just walked toward her and stopped behind her, close enough to feel the warmth of her body. She sniffled quietly and that was all he needed to close the gap between them.
He wrapped his arms around her from behind firmly. It wasn’t the kind of hug meant to comfort; it was the kind meant to hold someone together when they were falling apart. He could tell she was falling apart right in front of him and this was the only way he knew how to hold her together.
He pressed his face into her hair, breathing her in like his life depended on it.
“Yalda,” he said. "You'll be fine. Don't cry.”
She leaned back against him, her body gave in slightly to his warmth. Then he turned her around, cupping her face in his hands. His thumb brushed under her tired eyes to wipe the tears that had escaped.
He stared down into her eyes deeply and his heart broke on seeing more tears swirling in them. He wanted to fix her so badly, to clear her mind and numb the ache in her soul just so she could breathe and sleep well for a moment.
“Can I touch you?” he asked quietly.
She knew what he meant; he wasn’t talking about comfort. He meant intimacy, he meant the one thing that always seemed to pull them back from the edge.
Yalda’s chest tightened.
Her thoughts were conflicted at the moment and she didn't know how to respond. There was the guilt from being here with ioannis and wanting him to make her forget everything, it felt like she was betraying Alexander.
But her body knew Ioannis, and being so close to him with him asking if he could touch her sexually made it ache with familiarity. She wanted to feel something, anything that wasn't grief and guilt.
But could she truly let herself feel?
Ioannis didn’t move, he just waited, still holding her face in his hands, his breath steady. She stared up at his as she struggled to find an answer.
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