99: Please be alive.
**Jonathan pov**
I went after Aife and I refused to return close to the cabin unless I found her. Tracking her down felt like hell - either she was far too good at disappearing, or she ran faster than anyone could imagine.
First, I tried to follow the direction I saw a fading footsteps in, but no longer than mere minutes later, they faded for good. I stood in some bizarre crossroads of nothing but trees, snow and mountains surrounding me.
I looked around, took a deep breath, and tried to decide in which direction I should go.
As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t trust my instincts anymore.
Aife Was missing and she should have gone in any direction and at this point lunch there might be million different places she might be hiding.
Killian trusted me to keep her safe, but first, for me to do that, I had to find her.
I stood there, looking like a complete fool, a lost soul, for a good while until I had enough.
I groaned, ran a hand through my hair and cursed under my breath. “Come on, Jonathan, you can do this. You can’t let him down while he’s taking the worst of the tasks. Killian is out there, standing face to face with a monster that might as well kill us all and you’re just standing around like a lost puppy? Fuck you, get a grip on yourself!” I hissed.
Finally, I dropped my arms to my sides and took another deep breath. “Okay, think. If you were a pregnant, scared woman, where would you hide?” I muttered as I scanned the surroundings.
There was a massive chance that Aife might have decided to run for good. In that case, she would be far away by now.
However, there also was a chance that she wasn’t running at all. She might have decided to find a shelter and spend the night there until it was safe to resurface and check the situation.
I stressed my bottom lip between my teeth. Both options sounded valid, regardless of everything else, so I knew that I had to choose between the two of them.
My biggest problem was that I didn’t know Aife that well to know what she might do, how her thought process worked and how she reached in stressful situations.
All I knew was that she had to be scared if she saw no other choice but to run away from the cabin while all of us happened to be out.
“Fuck!” I growled as I grabbed my hair and pulled at it.
“Why couldn’t I stay around? Why didn’t I check if Zion and Kala were still near the cabin? How could I let myself believe that confessing my feelings was more important than ensuring she was safe? Selfish, so fucking selfish of me!”
The frustration only kept growing as I stood there, rooted on the spot. I was wasting time I didn’t have and that pissed me off more than anything ever had.
Zion was making sure his mate was safe, Killian was putting his life on the line, Aife was Goddess knew where and I? Well, I stood here and enjoyed a fucking pitty party I didn’t deserve.
“No more pity parties, Jonathan, breathe, calm down and get on the way before she gets into bigger trouble or Goddess forbid, someone dies,” I hissed again but didn’t move a muscle.
The problem was that for some reason, while I knew I had to start moving, my legs refused to do it.
Not only that, my mind refused to do so as well. Almost like my body and mind knew something I didn’t and kept me frozen on the spot for some unknown reason.
Just as I took a deep breath, hoping it could calm my raging nerves and rid me of the unexplainable anxiety, I heard something in the distance.
The sound was awful - a growl, something that resembled a cry and I was pretty sure bones were breaking too.
My heart sank as I held my breath and listened. It wasn’t a battle between multiple opponents, this was a fight between two giants and I knew exactly who they were.
Killian and Bane.
“F-fuck,” I breathed out shakily, pulling my hands into tight fists and digging my nails into my palms. “Goddess, if you can hear me, I beg you, please, make sure he survives this. Don’t take him from me, it’s too soon,” I pleaded under my breath, eyes squeezed shut as I kept listening.
The sounds in the background became louder and I could hear the pain in his growls, snarls and screams.
My Killian, my Alpha, was suffering because of some sick freak that had possessed the body he had no business in using as his own.
It was a split second decision, I knew I had to be mad for what I did and most likely would regret the consequences, but my fear overruled the logical thinking.
I spun on my heel and ran back towards the cabin, towards where those awful sounds were coming from.
I ran like my life depended on it, and maybe it really did, because it sure as fuck felt like it did.
I threw all the caution to the wind, forgot every command and goal we had had all this time, and focused only on one thing - Killian.
“Please be alive, please be alive,” I kept chanting as I was already getting out of breath, running through the snow that was reaching up to my knees already.
When I reached the cabin, I didn’t see Bane anywhere in sight, so I breathed out in relief, but I knew it was too soon to relax.
I quickly scanned the area and didn’t see any of our pack mates either, so I took off in the direction in which I saw Killian run in earlier.
I knew I reached the right area even before I saw it. The stench of blood was so overpowering, my knees nearly gave out from under me, but I kept pushing and just ran.
Once I got closer, I saw him - alone, laying in the pool of his own blood, no men, no Bane, just my Killian in his battered wolf form, torn and broken like an old rag doll.
“No, no, no,” I cried out in panic as I ran toward him and dropped to my knees next to his still bleeding body. His eyes were closed, chest barely moving with shallow breaths, “don’t you fucking dare to die on me. Don’t you dare to die before I get the chance to love you!”
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