9: I wish...
**Bane pov**
Aife didn’t let go. Fuck, I couldn’t even start to try to explain how good it felt to feel her skin against mine again.
Her touch was gentle, soothing, so familiar, but also, somehow she managed to silence the monster.
And the way she looked at me.. Fuck, it was like she could really see me, not the monster I was trapped in.
There was nothing else I could do but to lean into her touch more, demand without words for her to keep touching me and never let go.
I was a terribly selfish man and I knew that, but I didn’t care for as long as she still wanted me. Not to mention that she carried a life under her heart - a life we created together.
She looked so much more beautiful than I remembered her to be. Maybe it was the pregnancy glow everyone was talking about, I wasn’t sure, but now, there was something impossibly special about her.
“Bane,” she muttered my name and somehow, it sounded more like prayer on her lips than anything else. “I don’t think it’s a good idea. I want to, Goddess knows, damn it, I really want to go home with you, but.. I fear it might be a bad idea,” she whispered.
For the first time in my life, I learned how it felt when my heart cracked. Not only mine, but also that of the beast.
I was honestly taken aback because the beast seemed to feel the pain just as much as I did. It sure as fuck wasn’t mine, the creature was never meant to be a part of me, but somehow, it likely grew too tangled up with me.
“Please,” I finally muttered, leaning into her touch like a longing puppy. “I know we can fight this, whatever is really wrong with me, for as long as we fight together. I can’t stay away from you, this beast can’t stay away from you. And the monster, please believe me, he’s silent for as long as you touch me. He’s silent, my love.”
My whole body was shaking with both excitement and fear. I couldn’t just give up on her like this. I couldn’t stand here like an idiot and watch her leave me again.
To my utter surprise, the moment those thoughts flooded my mind, the beast whimpered. This awful, half rotten thing that looked like it could easily rule the world, it fucking whimpered like a small pup, desperate for any attention it could be given.
Aife kept looking at me like she could see through the horror appearance and see me. The very man that didn’t deserve her kindness and love in the slightest, the very monster hidden behind the appearance of another monster, yet she still loved him with all her heart.
“I’ll do anything in my power to keep you two safe. I’ll hang myself in silver, have wolfsbane injected in my veins, but I need you to be near. I know, for a fact, the beast won’t stop chasing you. I don’t know why he’s doing it, but he doesn’t want to hurt you. The only one who wishes ill is the very monster that’s staying silent right now,” I whispered, urging her to change her mind.
I didn’t know if there were people looking at us, and quite frankly, I didn’t care either. All that mattered was her and the look of absolute devotion in her eyes.
“Do you think my presence will fix anything?” Aife finally asked. I had no answer to her question, but the very fact that she questioned me at all was the only thing that truly mattered. If she asked something, it meant she was considering my words.
Before I could utter a word, she took a step closer, her body nearly pressed against that of the beast, “now, I don’t have to think only about myself, Bane. I need to think of the life I carry, the life, you said yourself, we created together. I’ve been protecting and hiding the baby all this time, I can’t just turn around and pretend the danger isn’t there anymore.”
I nodded like an eager fool. “Yes, I know, I understand. Trust me or not, I’ll do anything in my power to keep that baby and you safe. I know I’m putting you in a hard position and I fucking hate myself for that, but if nothing else eases your mind, know that myself and the beast, we both want to keep you safe. Two out of three creatures that absolutely don’t deserve you still want you so bad, it hurts.”
Her eyes softened right in front of me, a small smile spread across her lips and finally, I could see that little, stubborn spark shine in her eyes again. Goddess, I fucking missed it so much.
“I wish I could kiss you right now,” I whispered, “I wish I could kiss you like I used to, but the beast won’t release me. I wish.. I wish I could take back everything that happened and just be myself, just hold you the way you deserve to be held.”
“Maybe this was always meant to be,” she said quickly. “Maybe the Goddess paired us for a reason and she always intended for us to go through this together. She might be testing us, Bane.” Aife tried to reassure me.
If this truly was some kind of test, it had to be the sickest and most twisted test in the history of deity tests known to my kind.
Slowly, I released a heavy breath and leaned down further to press my forehead against hers. My eyes instantly fluttered closed, even the beast hummed in satisfaction at getting even closer to her. All I needed was a moment to savor, a memory to remember even after my time had come to an end.
When I opened my eyes again, hers were still closed, almost as if Aife needed to burn this moment in her memory just as desperately as I did.
“Please, I beg you, come home with me.”
***P.S. Still doing that “checking something” thing, PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT AFTER YOU FINISH READING THIS CHAPTER.***
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