Chapter 188
Cassie
No, no, no.
The words screamed through my mind even as huge raspy screams erupted from my throat. This couldn’t be happening. It couldn’t.
“Cassie.”
My screams died in my throat , as I struggled to get away from the man standing in the doorway with his mouth open and a shocked look on his face.
My movements were jerky, my balance completely off. I tumbled from the hospital bed to land on my ass with a thump. Wires and iv lines tore from my skin. Machines toppled over to surround me in shrieking machinery.
I scuttled backwards on my ass, pushing with my weak legs until I couldn’t go any further and I was wedged into a corner and the entire time I didn’t take my eyes from him.
Julian.
My husband stood alive and well. His handsome face was so familiar to me but at the same time he had changed. There was a speckling of grey at his temples now. More lines around his eyes but his face was still as ruggedly handsome as I remembered.
But he couldn’t be here. He was dead. I had seen him die. I’d tried and failed to save him and his hearts blood had bubbled up between my fingers.
Julian was dead but he was standing right in front of me.
How was that possible?
This was a dream. It had to be.
Wake up.
That’s what the voice had kept saying.
“Doctor what is wrong with her?” He took another step into the room, and then stopped as I hid my face away from him.
I didn’t want to see my dead mate. If this was a death dream then the goddess was cruel indeed to show me him. If I was to see him again then I wanted it to be a happy reunion in the afterlife.
I wanted it to be forever. I didn’t want this Julian. This angry hard faced man , so like the Julian I had first married.
“I think she is just in shock.” The doctor crouched down in front of me. Right in front of me so she hid my view of him.
Slowly she closed her hands around my wrists and tried to pull my hands down where they covered my face.
“Cassie.” She said softly. “You’re highness you’re safe I promise you. Just take a deep breath. It will help settle your heartbeat.”
I tried to do what she asked but it was impossible.
“That’s it. Just in and out. Your husband is just here to check on you. You remember Julian right. You remember him? Or are things a little fuzzy?”
Everything was fuzzy. I didn’t know what was reality or a death dream.
I shook my head, my lank hair whipping back and forth across my face. I peeked at his face thought my fingers. Why did he look the same but so different?
“Maybe you should step out.”
“Not a chance until I know she’s ok. I just need to make sure she’s ok and then I’ll go and get the boys.”
I dropped my hands to my lap and stared at him. “Niall and Noah.”
A look of surprise flickered across Julian’s face. His eyes darted to the doctors. “You told her their names?”
She shook her head. “No, they were the first thing she asked for. She already knew what you named them. If I had to guess I would say she heard. Some people in comas come out having heard everything that was discussed around them.” She said softly. “I’ve never heard anything from someone who was gone at long as Cassie but I guess a mothers love-“
“I want to see my boys.” I croaked. Tears were rolling down my cheeks.
Inching closer Julian crouched down. Bringing up almost level. I stared into his eyes for a second and then looked away. It was too intense looking into his eyes. The eyes of a ghost.
“I’ll go and get them. So you can see them.” He said softly. “They will be excited to meet you.”
“Not for long though your highness. She needs rest and-“
“We won’t stay long.” He snapped. “But she wants to see them and they are going to be excited to meet her.” He turned his eye to me with a smile. “You’re doing so well Cassie, and I’m so happy to see you awake and talking. Do you remember what happened?”
Mutely I nodded. Of course I remembered. I had taken my own life to be with him. And by doing so I had left my babies behind.
“I died.” I whispered. “I left my babies behind and died,” I took a deep breath and then let it out in a steady stream. “But they were fine. They were looked after and protected. People thought I was crazy because I could hear them crying when they weren’t with me.”
They exchanged a startled look. A look passing between them that I didn’t understand.
“Please may I see my babies.” I whispered. “Just for a second to say goodbye?”
“Goodbye?” Julian’s dark eyebrows shot down. “Why would you say goodbye now we have you back?” He seemed genuinely confused and truthfully so was I.
I blinked slowly. Cocking my head to the side. “Because I’m dead.” I said in a flat voice.
“You’re not dead Cassie.” The doctor gave a nervous chuckle. “We lost you for a few minutes but your vitals are good now. Some rest, and with a little time you can go home to your family and start to heal.”
“But-“
Julian reached for my hand. His fingers entwined with mine. “You’re not dead Cassie. You are right here. Finally back where you belong. You aren’t dead.” He said again more firmly. “You’re just confused and tired.”
I snatched my hand back. Even though his fingers were warm I didn’t want to touch a ghost. Not even one that looked and sounded like him.
“I am dead.” I snapped and my eyes flashed. “I took my own life because.” All eyes turned to me in shock. “Because you were dead as well.”
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