Chapter 196
Cassie
I took the bedroom for the next three days. Every morning Julian greeted me at the kitchen table with a smile and a nod but he didn’t touch me and we didn’t really talk. Things were so strained that I felt like I was living in a nightmare state again.
Maybe it would have been best, if I had just stayed where I was. Even if the loss of my mate made me want to die. Surely it was better than this? Because this wasn’t the Julian I remembered from my coma dream. There was a gaping chasm between us and I didn’t know how to cross it without letting him have Megan in his life.
The woman who had ripped us apart in this lifetime and killed him in the other. That’s how I was beginning to think about them. Two lifelines . The same but different and running parallel to each other. He kept choosing her and we kept paying the price.
So yes maybe it would have been better if I had stayed in the other life. I could have dealt with my grief, I could have gone and thrown myself into motherhood and let the kingdom rot.
Only deep down I knew I couldn’t and anyway there was no going back now. I was dead there. It was here that I needed to make a difference.
If I could find a way to do it anyway.
So I threw myself into being a mum to Niall and Noah and it was amazing. They were great little boys, mischievous but perfect little gentleman and I loved them so much. Life would have been lonely if I couldn’t spend my days playing and laughing with them.
Shaking my head. I watched as they ran the full length of the lawn in the back of the palace and then back again. Laughing their little heads off as they raced back towards me.
Together they flung themselves into my arms, toppling me over, so I fell laughing into the warm grass with my arms around them both.
“You two are just too fast.” I giggled as I squeezed them tight.
“I am the fastest.” Niall said with a proud jut of his chin.
In answer Noah turned to him with a little growl that drew his lips away from his teeth. “But I am strongest.” Another little growl and he launched himself at his brother.
They tumbled away, pup like growls erupting from both of them.
“Boys.” Julian barked out a command that didn’t stop them at all. “Boys that’s enough.” Striding past me , he gripped each one by the collar he lifted them apart and that’s when I saw the small changes to their bodies. Their teeth were longer. The usually short nails had elongated and their eyes were no longer human.
They had started to change and I hadn’t even noticed it.
Dropping them to their feet, Julian crouched in front of them. “What have I told you about controlling your animals.”
Two identical faces dropped. “We are sorry papa-“
“No. If you can’t control yourselves then that is enough rough housing for today.” Pulling himself up , he pointed back to the house. “Inside now and go the kitchen. We will do something a bit more calm until you learn to calm down and not let emotions get the better of you.”
They filled inside. Neither one of them looked at me.
“I’m sorry I didn’t realise-“ I began to say and froze when Julian turned that angry stare at me.
“Exactly that Cassie. You didn’t realise.” He glared at me.
“How was I meant to know that they could partially shift already? They are so young.” I countered.
“You know by talking to me. Something you don’t want to do.” Julian sighed and his shoulders slumped. “Something you clearly don’t want to do.”
I stared at him open mouthed. “It’s not that I don’t want to. It’s the fact that I feel like I don’t know you.”
“Of course you don’t. I don’t know you either and that’s something we have to work on. So -“ he took a deep breath, almost like he was trying to steady himself. “I think we need to step back. Maybe act like-“
“I see.” I took a step away from him and then turned on my heel and walked away back towards the house. At least there I could find a deserted room and hide myself away from him.
“Cassie?”
“I get it. My mum should be ok with putting me up for a while. I don’t have anything to pack really so I’ll just go and call her.” I mumbled as I walked away. “Could I still see the boys?”
Had I really given up my life for this?
He caught me before I could step through the door. Trapping me against the wall, with his arms either side of my head.
“What are you going on about Cassie?” Leaning over me he growled low in his throat and my body reacted instantly.
“You said step back-“
“I didn’t mean I wanted you to leave you silly girl. I meant that we have to get to know each other. Properly. Like we should have done before we got married. I want to take you out on some dates. Have some fun and of course we have a party to arrange.”
I lifted my eyes to him. “A party?”
“Yes. To welcome you back. I have some amazing ideas. I think you will love it. But dates and spending time with each other first.” He nodded his head. “If you would like that?”
Chewing on my lip I mulled it over and then nodded. “Yes I would like it. But I have a request.”
Bite bite bite, I was chewing on my lip so hard that it was surprising that it wasn’t bleeding.
“Anything.” He paused.
“Can you sleep back in our bedrooms with me?”
For a second Julian hesitated and then his entire face went soft. “Of course I will. I thought you would never ask.”
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