228
Margot and I got together every weekend, sometimes at her house and sometimes at mine. The crew had met her and they all liked her and she became part of our circle without any effort. Our kids played together and we’d sneak off to some corner and a few times we really had to act quickly.
We had rules for this friends with benefits situation that we found ourselves in. Weekends we were together, sometimes sleeping over but during the week we focused on our jobs and our kids. We weren’t dating other people and we weren’t dating each other either, not really.
I had turned twenty-six and Christmas was around the corner. Every year we had Christmas together at my house with Chandra, Lauren, Billy and Joey. We exchanged gifts, ate our fill and drank wine. It was usually a peaceful day but this year we’d include Margot and her son, Robbie.
It was Saturday afternoon and I lay on Margot’s couch and watched some movie portraying the life of Vikings. The violence didn’t bother me but Margot looked away every time someone got butchered or beheaded and there were quite a few of those.
An odd sensation had filled me ever since last night and even Echo was puzzled by it. Margot knew what I was since she grew up in a wolf pack but was human. Robbie was half wolf and Margot was happy when she met Joey and he gave her some much needed pointers.
The feeling had only increased that morning when Riley and I drove to Centralia to spend the weekend with Margot and Robbie. We didn’t have any plans and the weather was cold enough to warrant that we’d stay indoors.
I was just dozing off when I heard Riley and Margot in the kitchen and the conversation was enough for me to snap open my eyes.
“If you’re Robbie’s mommy does that mean you’re my mommy too?”
“I could be, Riley.”
I stood up from the couch and walked into the kitchen as Riley turned her sweet smile on me and I couldn’t help but smile back at her. “Why don’t you go see what Robbie’s up to?”
“Okay, Daddy.”
I watched her as she bound out of the kitchen and ran down the hallway to Robbie’s room where he was playing with his action figures. Margot watched me intently as I turned back towards her and she swallowed nervously.
“I’m sorry, she caught me off guard.”
I didn’t know how to feel about what Riley had asked. “You tell her no, Margot. You’re not her mother.”
“It was an honest answer, Ethan. I could be her mother and you could be Robbie’s dad if you gave a little of yourself to us.”
“We both agreed on being friends with benefits.”
“Yeah, well things can change and things have changed.”
“How have things changed?” I was feeling irritated because Riley had a mother. It didn’t matter that she was dead.
“How dense are you, Ethan? Can’t you see that I’m in love with you? I have been for months now.” Margot dragged a hand through her hair as I took a step backwards.
“You want more.” The truth bulldozed into me and knocked the breath from my lungs.
“Yes, I want more.”
I shook my head sadly as I leaned on my arms on the counter and looked at her. “I can’t give you more, Margot.”
“Why not? We’ve been in a relationship even if you don’t want to admit it to yourself. Why do you keep clinging to the memory of your dead fiancé?”
“Don’t. Don’t talk about things you have no clue about!” I turned around and walked out of her kitchen and pulled my jacket on by the front door.
“You’re leaving? You don’t even want to discuss this?”
Riley appeared in the doorway, her eyes wide. “Grab your bag, princess.” I turned to look at Margot again and I could see anger mixed with pain in her eyes. “It’s better if I don’t, you’ll only hurt worse. I told you months ago that I didn’t want anything more, you agreed. It’s better this way, trust me, Margot. I’m not the man you marry.”
I took Riley’s bag from her and picked her up, opened the front door and walked out as Margot yelled my name and then I heard her cry. I closed off my emotions as I strapped Riley in and drove the twenty minutes back to Chehalis.
Echo grumbled at me and I thought about what I had just done. Was I being stupid? I couldn’t tell her that I still loved Luce, that without a bond replacing the love I felt for her it would never go away, that Luciana would always fill my heart.
When I looked at Riley I imagined that this was what she had looked like as a child. She had Luce’s gentleness but also her fierceness. She was brave and strong and beautiful like her mother. If I gave Margot more I’d just be lying to her.
“It’s better this way, Wynter.”
“I know, Echo.”
Riley fidgeted in her seat and her foot kicked me in the back of my seat. “I’m sorry, Daddy.”
“It’s okay, princess, but try not to kick me again.”
“Not that, I’m sorry about Margot.”
“It wasn’t your fault, you don’t have to say you’re sorry.” I looked at her in the rearview mirror and gave her a smile.
“Okay.” Her foot landed smack in the middle of my back again and I narrowed my eyes at her as she giggled.
“Alright, you run inside and I’ll grab the bags.”
I parked the car and Riley unbuckled herself and left the car door and the front door wide open. I could only shake my head at her antics. Her winter boots lay discarded at the bottom of the stairs and her jacket halfway up the stairs.
“Riley! Pick up your stuff, young lady!”
“My arms have no energy left, Daddy!”
I smiled despite trying to teach her manners and picked her stuff up from the floor. I placed my backpack in the walk-in closet and sighed as I sat down on my bed and took my shoes off. I changed my jeans for sweats and headed back down to the kitchen.
For some reason I hadn’t been ready to take that leap and make Margot a chosen half. There was nothing wrong with her. She was a good listener, a great mom to Robbie and she had spunk. I had no clue what was wrong with me.
Chandra snapped her fingers in front of my face and I blinked as she stood in front of me. “What’s going on with you?”
“Nothing.”
“Fine … why are you back so soon?”
“Margot and I had a slight disagreement.” I stood up from where I’d been sitting and switched the coffee machine on.
“About?”
“I take it Joey isn’t home for you to interrogate.”
“Did you tell her that your real name’s not Ethan?”
My hand froze on the cabinet handle and I turned around to see Chandra smiling and looking very pleased with herself as she now sat on my chair. I had no words and I had no idea how she knew what she knew.
“When you’re guard’s down I can hear your dragon. I’m a spirit fae, Ethan.”
“You can’t tell anyone.”
“I don’t know what your real name is, your dragon mostly calls you an idiot.” I smiled briefly because that was mostly true.
“Shit, Chandra.”
“So spill. What happened with Margot?”
I finished the coffee and sat down next to Chandra and then I told her about Margot wanting more. “Luciana didn’t die in childbirth, she was killed right after, stabbed to death and I was too late to stop it.”
“Ethan … you can’t blame yourself for the rest of your life.”
“Easier said than done. Margot’s perfect really but I’m scared shitless to love again. I’ve lost everything once before and I don’t think I can go through that again.”
“Everybody’s scared most of the time. Take me and Lauren for example. I’ve always known that I liked girls but Lauren likes guys, well she did. The thing is we met, the bond pulled us closer and she resisted because she had just gotten out of a really violent relationship and even though she liked me as a friend she didn’t want to bond with me and have a relationship.”
“What did you do?”
“I kept at it, Ethan. I showed her what real love was like, what a relationship between us would be like and the first time she kissed me, it was magical. We’ve never looked back and yeah her parents freaked out a lot and that’s how we ended up in Chehalis.”
“I don’t think that’s in the cards for me.”
“It could be if you opened yourself up. That’s how life works. Am I afraid of losing Lauren? Of course I am, but I’m not going to let that fear take over my life or stop me from living it with her, not today and not tomorrow. I’ll take every single moment with her that I can, that’s what love is.”
“Let’s say you’re right and we could have this happy ever after, the problem you’re forgetting is that I can’t bond with Margot at all. Dragons only bond with humans if they’re a fated bonded half. If I took her it would have to be because I truly love her and that’s the part where I stumble.”
“Fine, we’ll get you a nice dragon girl.”
A smile crept up to my mouth even though I didn’t want to smile and Chandra smiled back at me. “If Margot was dragonkin, maybe we could’ve had something. The thing is we both agreed on being friends with benefits. She’s the one that suddenly wanted more.”
“Oh Ethan, how stupid you men are. Women never really want to be friends with benefits, they’ll always want more at some point.”
“We could be friends with benefits.” Chandra laughed loudly at my remark and shook her head.
“Trust me, we’ll break your back without even trying.”
“Thanks, now I’ve got that image in my head.”
Chandra’s shoulders shook as she laughed. “One more for the shower and that’s why I’m your best friend.”
“Right … best friend.”
“Why don’t you go take care of that while I grab Riley from upstairs. We’re making pancakes and you’re welcome to join once you’ve unhitched that tent.”
I closed my eyes as Chandra laughed and practically ran from the kitchen. “Lee-lee, come on we’re making pancakes!”
“Coming Cha-Cha!”
I heard Riley’s footsteps coming down the stairs and her happy giggle as Chandra picked her up. The front door closed and I looked down at my erection. ‘Get a grip on yourself, Grey,’ I thought to myself and sighed audibly.
Log in with Google Account
Chapters
Favorite
Settings
