10: Goodbye, Jasmine

**Jasmine**

*Breathe, Jasmine. In and out, in and out*. I kept repeating these words over and over again as I painfully took in gasps of air. London, who had thankfully come yesterday and stayed with me in my room after hearing about Damon's antics, was holding a wet cloth which she gently dabbed on my head. It was not helping though; my body was on fire. It was a feeling so familiar to me, resembling the day I was bitten. However now, it felt as though I was being engulfed in thick, hot lava. There was no escaping it, and all I could do was scream in agony. The most frightening part was that it was not even near nightfall yet, and I was told that the pain would only escalate then.
"I hate him!" It practically ripped out from my mouth in a sort of loud roar as I thrashed against the bed which now, against my body, made me ache all over.
"I know you do Sweety." London said. She had now resorted to throwing buckets of ice-cold water on my body to keep me cool. Landon was right next to her, seeing as he needed to be here for the mess he created. This was, however, not only his fault, and the person directly responsible for my pain was not here. God knew where he was at a time like this.
Another surge of pain shot through me, and I found myself throwing up the breakfast I had eaten all over the floor next to me. London scrunched up her nose and so did Landon who eventually went to grab a mop to clean it up. This type of transformation did wonders to my dignity. At some point London had to even help me to the bathroom and by afternoon, she and Landon were exhausted from hearing me scream in agony, screech out in hatred and string out many, many cuss words. And so, when the sun began setting, I tried convincing them to leave me be.
"P-please. You guys need to r-rest for just a little while. It won't g-get any better than this..." I pleaded. After a few more yells and even louder screams they finally took my advice and left me in the room- alone. I was thankful. Having people surrounding me like they were, had me on edge. I needed space and air. It was not long before I heard the door being unlocked and someone walking into the room, and then carefully locking the door behind them. At first, I assumed that it was Landon or London. However, as soon as I took in a breath of air, I had it all figured out. I began to shiver and quake at the scent and my skin became electrified, no longer on fire but rather covered in a pleasant tingly sensation. I turned around and saw Damon standing in the corner of the room, just staring at me with eyes twisted into a confused look and arms folded. But his eyes weren't his. They swirled with red which engulfed the tiny specks of hazel left. He said nothing to me, just stared and breathed. But his presence was apparently enough. The pain, although still dreadfully excruciating, was at least more bearable. But after a while, I grew frustrated at the lack of words between us, and finally muttered something.
"You came."
He nodded, neared the bed, and then sat on it, making it creak slightly.
"Your screams can be heard throughout the entire pack grounds. It's really bothering my pack members, so I thought I'd come here for just a little while to get you to stop making such a noise." Of course, he never showed up because he cared. That was miles apart from who Damon was, and who I wanted him to be.
"So, this rich community," I began as I remembered how strange it was the first time I had come here, "is actually just full of werewolves?"
He nodded, and then explained that he owned the property for at least a whopping one hundred square kilometres which enclosed his pack grounds.
"Wow, rich and powerful. I sure am lucky." It was sarcastic, but he didn't seem to pick it up as he uttered a low, "You're damn right." So, I rolled my eyes and turned away from him, already having had enough of our little conversation. Logically, it would have made sense for him to leave me be and let me continue to scream in agony, seeing as the sun was almost completely gone. He, however, had other ideas and soon lay down on the bed, next to me. I was confused, but turned away from him, so as not to face him. This, in turn, gave him the opportunity to snake his arm around my waist and pull me right up against his chest. I was extremely confused by his strange actions but chose to lie in silence. We both did, neither one of us willing to talk. All we did was feel the electric pulses moving through our bodies, drawing us to this state of togetherness.
"Why?" I hadn't meant to say it out loud.
"Why what?" His voice made me shiver almost in some sort of sick, sadistic, form of pleasure. And so, I took a gulp before I continued. "Why does the pain go away when you touch me, or when you're near?"
"Because" he then turned me around, so I was facing him and staring at me through his red eyes, "That's how mates work. We are dependent on each other for strength. Werewolves are designed that way- whole and yet somehow constantly in a state of being incomplete, always awaiting our other half. So, the answer to your question is that I am currently taking all of that away simply by touching you and being near you."
"So why have you decided to take my pain away? Is it some sort of tactic into getting me to owe you or something?" I asked.
He chuckled which was strange and yet quite pleasant to my ears. "The human half of me hates you, but this werewolf half doesn't. I just don't want you to suffer too much because of me. I know it's difficult but think of me as one person with two totally different sides, my wolf side and my human side. Both these sides are Damon, just different forms of me. The same will happen to you after you transform."
It was all so strange. But I could not say I didn't believe him, given how much more he seemed to be able tolerate me when his eyes were red, and his teeth were out. I couldn't agree with him on his idea that werewolves were incomplete and waiting for their mates though. I couldn't believe it, because I always saw myself as complete, not needing anyone else to fill any gaps. To me, mates seemed to just be side effects of being half wolf. It was a sort of animalistic part of being a werewolf, which I was sure one could ignore. And so was this half of Damon. It wouldn't last forever, and once the human side of him was in control, I was sure that I'd be receiving the same cruel, heartless treatment. Nonetheless I didn't move from his embrace. I couldn't, because all I could do was think about the oath, I had made to myself. And so, I let this be the last little bit of indulgence.
***

By the time the moon was out, not even Damon's presence could keep the pain away. It was searing hot as it scorched through my flesh, and my bones ached and felt brittle.
I let out a loud, screech which sent London running to get another shot of morphine. In her mind, the morphine gave her solace. That would be the only logical explanation for her constantly injecting me with drugs which were not helping. Landon just paced up and down, which really was just making me angrier. The only person who seemed to actually know how to keep their distance, was Damon who just stood there. Right now, his eyes were back to hazel. Although I could see he was trying to remain indifferent, he couldn’t hide that subtle flash of concern which lingered beneath his indifference.
Suddenly, my gums began to sting, and inside my mouth I began to taste the metallic taste of blood.
"She's turning! Stand back Landon!" London said pulling Landon away from me.
The loud sounds of bones cracking as well as the eardrum-shattering sound of my screeches filled the air. Each and every one of my bones shattered and started to reform and the pain it caused was unbearable. My skin was on fire and thick, black hairs grew from it. Hot tears fell from my eyes and soon I arched my back as my spinal cord snapped. It was all downhill from there as the pain only grew and grew. Imagine having your skin being ripped clean from your flesh and your body being thrown into an enormous blender. Then imagine being trampled over by millions and millions of feet made of shards of rough rock. That is what it felt like, but worse. My body then jolted and thrashed, causing it to fall off of the bed. I stayed there for a while, just panting heavily, until I realised that the pain had stopped. Slowly, I rose to my feet... But they were no longer feet. Instead, I stood on four paws- black fur-covered paws, to be exact.
"No way!" It was London's voice, and I looked at her as she spoke. "She's a black-furred wolf. How is this even possible?”
Damon just stayed silent, eyeing me cautiously. Was there something wrong? Was I mutated? I tried to ask these questions but all that left my mouth were a few grunts and growls. Surprisingly though, they seemed to understand me.
"No, it's just, females do not usually get black fur. Black fur is usually reserved for wolves of a certain rare and powerful breed. Most of the time, black fur indicates position in the werewolf hierarchy too."
So then what position was I?
"Alpha. You have an Alpha's fur." Landon burst out. Damon growled in response to his words and said very coldly, "She is not an Alpha. She is a Luna and that's the position she will keep."
But I didn't care. Alpha, Luna, Omega, Delta- thank you, teen supernatural phase. I couldn't give a damn about what position my fur made me. All I knew was that oath I had made. And so, I eyed the window. I was heavy enough now to break through those burglar bars and through the window. That was my aim. London saw where my eyes were looking as she eyed me and then the window. The other two were so busy arguing and baring teeth, that they did not even notice when she nodded and said lowly, "Go."
I bowed my head, took a few steps back and then charged for the window, using my large wolf-like body to launch myself towards it. At first, I was sceptical that it would even work. But soon I found my body launched up in mid-air. The ground was moving closer and closer towards me, and I found myself reciting my oath. ‘I will die, before I become someone's captive.’ That's all I could think of as my body fell to the ground and the tears began to fall. I wished to die human, but this was enough, and at least now I could be with my parents. At least now I wouldn't need to live this life of secrets and shackles. I would die Jasmine.

My body soon hit the ground with a loud thump, and I lay there for a few moments, certain I was about to die because of the impact. But I didn't. In fact, I hardly even felt any pain except a little sting here or there. And so, I opened my eyes and looked around, at the beautiful lawn and wolf statues to my right. I was alive, I was free, and I was in his front yard. I was just about to run and break through the gate, when I heard the loud thuds of footsteps. As soon as I turned my head to see where the sound was coming from, I regretted it. A large snarling black wolf, much larger than I was and with large glowing red eyes, stood a few feet away from me.

"*You are not getting away from me.*" His mouth never opened but yet I still heard him.
"*Leave me alone, Damon.*" I never spoke either, instead, I tried to use my mind, the way he had.
But he put his paw down, ready to charge at me and then let out a loud, threatening growl. If I wanted any freedom at all, I knew I would need to run as though my life depended on it- because it did. So I sprinted, letting my limbs push me forward as fast as possible. Surprisingly, I was faster than he was, given that I was less bulky and now pumping with adrenaline. We made our way to the familiar guard who glanced at us questioningly as we passed by, and then I decided to turn left into the thick woods, confident that I could lose him, make my way home, grab a few things, and then make my escape.
"*You think because you're fast I won't-*"
It took me a moment, but I figured out how not to hear him. I just had to think of nothing and ignore all his efforts to even try to speak. All I could see in front of me were trees. Everything looked the same, but I knew I needed to keep running. I knew that at the edge of these woods would be the road I was familiar with, and I could find my way home. I wouldn't stop running. I'd escape him, I needed to. Suddenly, I heard pants and thuds behind me and my skin underneath my black fur began to tingle. He was getting closer. Luckily for me though, in the distance, I could see traces of light, probably the streetlamps, and I bolted towards them, panting and heaving in relief. The road was empty, thankfully, but even so, I chose to still stay at the edge of the woods as I followed it. It was only when I arrived at the bridge and saw the raging water of the river in front of me, that I dared to enter the road. Some part of me hoped Damon would stop here, but I couldn't indulge in it.

***

It took about ten more minutes before I arrived at my apartment. At first, I was happy and even relieved, until I looked at my reflection in the glass door leading to the building. What stared back at me was an unnaturally large wolf with thick black fur. My eyes, however, were no longer an angelic white, but instead a deep red colour, resembling Damon's. Was this really me? Was I really this monster?
Suddenly I heard a few voices which led me to another one of my world-renowned decisions... I broke the door, shattering it to pieces as I entered. I hadn't meant to, I just forgot that my body was too large for the door. Luckily, the night guard seemed to have been asleep and not even the shattering of glass awoke his deep slumber. I took the opportunity to use the stairs, fully aware that I would not be able to go into the elevator. After I'd reached the first floor, with much difficulty I might add, I made my way to my door, thanking the stars that it was midnight and most people on my floor were old and already tucked up snug in bed. But as soon as I reached the door, I was mortified to find it open and immediately proceeded with caution. Everything in the kitchen seemed fine and only a few dirty dishes caught my attention. I then made my way further into the apartment, towards the lounge area but stopped suddenly when I saw someone sitting on one of my couches. He was tall, had well-kept, dark brown hair, striking golden eyes, a breathtakingly gorgeous face and was, from what I could see, well-built as the muscles beneath the fabric of his black blazer threatened to break through. It took just a moment before I realised that the man sitting in my apartment was the devil himself- Lucien Cyrus.
My plan was initially to back away and make a run for it, until a strange scent invaded my nose, drawing me nearer to its familiarity.
"Jasmine?" His deep voice uttered, almost frightening me half to death. I looked down, confused and hoping that I was now human. However, my body remained unchanged and was still cloaked in fur, which meant that he knew that I was this creature. It also meant something else, something which was turning this night from nightmarish into its own version of hellish.
"I-it can't be!" He said suddenly standing up on his feet and thereafter pacing up and down before me with a face contorted in horror. "You've been tainted!"
His eyes flashed to me when the last word left his mouth and I saw within the gold, specks of maddening red beginning to form which sent chills up and down my spine. Lucien was usually calm and cool. He never raised his voice. But now, he was on the brink of yelling and practically keeping himself from ripping me to shreds. So, I concluded that there could only be one explanation for his sudden change in eye-colour and calm demeanour- he was undoubtedly a werewolf. As the seconds passed by, he began growling and howling and slowly his bones started cracking. I had never felt such pure rage, malice and downright terrifying power radiate from someone the way it radiated from him. Not even from Damon. Slowly, I backed away in terror. Lucien noticed and snarled as thick black fur coated his face and his mouth and his nose began to elongate to form a snout.
"*You should never have let yourself be turned. You should have never let yourself become *His*." He now stood up on all- fours. He was massive and made me seem tiny like a little cat in comparison to a lion. He smiled darkly, baring his sharp fangs, with an evil glint in his eyes. "Oh no no my little Vixen, you are *mine*.”
I was curious about his choice of words. *His…* Did Lucien know about Damon? Unfortunately, I didn’t have the luxury of asking. Lucien was making it all too clear that he didn’t intend to let me leave this apartment. And so, the real game of cat and mouse began, with him pouncing on me. I, however had the paranoid advantage of pure, raw adrenaline on my side and dodged him swiftly, turned sharply and bolted. This time I was not as fortunate as I was when I’d arrived and found a few horrified and shocked humans here and there. It took all of me to ignore them, instead of ripping them limb from limb like the wolf part of me wanted to. Eventually I made my way downstairs and out of the apartment building, only to see another pair of red eyes coming towards me from the distance. *Just great*, I thought, now I had two beasts after me and absolutely nowhere to run to. I had no time to dwell on this though as I heard the loud thudding and screeching of paws and claws on the ground. So, I continued to run, trying my best to follow the road ahead. It wasn't until a moment or so later that I remembered the river that I had passed on the way here. I knew I could not turn back, so instead, I would need to follow this road to the next bridge. It took me an eternity of adrenaline fuelled sprinting before I made my way to the bridge, with Lucien hot on my tail. Despite his size, he was unnaturally fast, unlike Damon. Once I had reached the bridge I halted. Once again, I was facing something life threatening and all I could think of was my oath. I would not live a captive; I would rather die free. And so, as I heard the loud thuds closing in on me, I jumped off of the bridge, throwing myself into the raging icy water. At first, I sank really low, almost to the bottom of the river given my new size and weight. Finally, after a few terrifying moments of struggling against the rough current which thrust me forward, I found myself with my head above the water and paws desperately paddling through the water. To me, this was the best decision I had ever made. The water would get rid of my scent, and there would be no way that both of them would follow me to the death in this icy river. I would swim until my limbs gave in, or until I was a safe distance away from this place, whichever came first. Whatever came after that... well I'd get to that part when it arrived. For now, I was safe, and I was out of reach from the crazy beasts waiting to capture me. And for a moment, I finally cleared up my mind and opened it up for communication, knowing that both Damon and Lucien would be near enough to hear what I had to say.
"*Goodbye.*"
But it wasn't just a goodbye to Damon and Lucien. Instead, it was a final farewell to the old Jasmine.

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So this chapter was hectically long, but I figured I needed to get the show on the road because from this point, we are finally getting into the actual action packed and mind-blowing part of the story. I literally cannot wait to release the next chapter! Also, just to clarify, I know in a lot of werewolf novels mind-links are usually between pack members. However here I am making it a general mode of communication between werewolves. Hope you loved this chapter!