25: More than just tolerate

**Tristan**

After the utterly embarrassing incident this morning, I thought I was completely done with all necessary interactions with His Majesty Lucien Michaels. I was, however, proved wrong exactly seven minutes before my lunchbreak, when the devil himself came waltzing into the office I worked in, drawing all of the room's attention to himself.

Naturally my response was to ignore him and carry on drafting an email to a client Damon was meeting the following day. I wished, more than anything for my own desk away from these gawking idiots. Most Personal Assistants I knew (which were not many) had their own little front desks. And yet here I was, subjected to the same treatment as every other office employee. Though I wondered if that was the point. And as I thought this, Lucien began nearing my desk, interrupting me from my thoughts and nearly distracting me from my task of ignoring him.

"Excuse me, kitten," he began talking to Pearl beside me, "but could I sit here?"

This was, perhaps one of the occasions I found myself completely despising Pearl who had, much to my own detriment, been enchanted by Lucien's flirtatious charm and smile. She nodded dreamily and began gathering up her things. But as soon as she reached for a stack of paperwork on her desk, I gripped at her hand firmly, immediately making her head snap towards me in sudden surprise. I shook my head at her in an effort to prevent her from leaving her seat, but unfortunately, I was outmatched by Lucien's charm as he gently rested his finger under her chin and tilted her head towards him. She gulped as she stared up into his eyes, and immediately I knew I was absolutely defeated for the second time today.

Slowly she got up from her chair and left to sit in one of the empty seats further back in the room. Lucien then decided to take her place, and the second he sat down, my eyes quickly returned to my laptop screen, and I hurriedly began typing.

"Ignoring me, are we?" Lucien muttered. Did the man actually work? In fact, I found myself wondering what the actual purpose for him being here was- besides annoying the shit out of me, but that was, of course, a given.

"Don't you have something better to do than sit around and annoy me all day?" I asked, never once taking my eyes off of my laptop screen. I heard him chuckle before saying, "There is nothing as satisfying as seeing that irritated look on your face. Besides, you broke my desk, it's only right I find a more conducive space to work in for the time being."

"And what work do you do?"

"Well right at this moment, annoying you seems to be my number one task. But I'm actually here to accompany my brother on his meetings. Unlike him, I carry a sort of charm around me that cannot be resisted... not even by someone as unfeeling as you, Love."

He was not wrong there, but I had no intention of saying this out loud. He'd already taken two of my wins, a third would have been embarrassing for me. And so, I began to ask about his brother, not to make him jealous, but in hopes of squeezing out some information from him.

"Earlier this morning your brother seemed to be troubled. Is he having trouble with his mate?"

At this Lucien scoffed and tugged at my chair, forcing me to remove my eyes from my laptop and instead I place them on him. They'd darkened again, and I could tell I had struck a nerve of his.

"Are you really still thinking about him? Did you lie when you said you had no feelings for him?" He was yelling now, and although I was more than happy to provoke him, I decided against it, in fear of causing a scene in the office. And so, I resorted to telling him a little slip of the truth.

"Of course, I don't have feelings for him. I was just curious. I find myself rather interested in the emotions and thoughts of other people. You, for example are jealous, not because you love me, but because you despise the idea of me having any sort of feelings towards your brother. You've already lost one woman to him, and the thought of losing another drives you mad."

I knew my words pushed the right buttons because when they left my mouth, his eyes began returning to their golden colour, and he dropped his eyes from mine, trying to avoid the intense gaze I held.

He stared at the ground for a moment before taking a deep breath and suddenly returning his gaze to mine again, this time mustering up a smile to wipe away all traces of the dread he felt because of the truth I'd just exposed. Instead, he held a hand out and said, "I'll tell you if you'll join me outside for a smoke."

I cocked an eyebrow and asked, rather surprised, "You smoke?"

"Sometimes. Now come along. I'll buy you some coffee and something to eat after, if you'd like."

It was my break time, and I was hungry for both food and answers... And so, I found myself accepting his offer. More time with Lucien was not my favourite way to pass a lunchbreak by, but I was certain it would help me in my task of seducing him.

***

The air outside was a little cooler than I expected, but a lot fresher than the air inside the stuffy office. Lucien and I had decided to converse in one of the more secluded areas so as to keep from being disrupted by our nosey co-workers. Once we'd found a quiet enough spot- near the underground parking area, he reached into his pockets and retrieved from them a lighter and a pack of cigarettes.

"Want one?" he asked after sliding one of his cigarettes between his lips. I declined.

"How often do you smoke?" I asked, purely out of curiosity.

He lit his cigarette, took a puff, and then exhaled sending smoke pouring from between his lips, before answering me. "More not than often. I don't really like the smell, and if I'm being honest, smoking does very little to bring me any sort of relief. Instead, I find comfort in the concept of smoking. Besides, it's not like cigarettes could kill werewolves... unfortunately." He mumbled the last bit out silently, but I caught onto what he'd said. Instead of questioning it, I decided to drop the issue of Lucien's cigarettes and instead return to the issue of Damon's dismal face.

"So why was your brother upset this morning?"

He took another puff at his cigarette and then said, "Rogue activity. It's becoming a problem, not only for the werewolf community, but for my own Vixen organisation. There was an incident sometime last week. One of my Vixens was targeted for being a suspected rogue. Unfortunately, the man who targeted her didn't quite know that every single Vixen is under my protection. And so, I sent a little message. When people hurt the people I care about, the people I am supposed to protect... well then I get a little unfriendly."

By "a little unfriendly" he meant psychotically blood thirsty. But that was not the only thing I found myself concerned by. I found myself caught off guard by the look that he gave me. It was the first time I'd been given such an intense stare by him, as though he were examining me. I found myself avoiding his eye contact, at least, until he spoke. Of course, I knew I would not easily give myself away as being part of Lucien and Damon's so-called rogue problem, but I could never be too careful around Lucien. He was much smarter than he appeared, and that fact had me wary.

"You don't seem to be the type of person to belong to a pack... or am I mistaken?"

I now had two options: to lie about belonging to a pack, or, to lie about not belonging to a pack. The former option would be rather difficult to execute, especially considering the edgy truth to it. The latter, however, would be easier, especially considering that he was right. I did not seem the type to belong to a pack.

"You are not mistaken. I don't belong to a pack." I said.

He nodded, then started blowing smoke from his lips. "Did your parents decide to raise you without the guidance of a pack, in a more human manner? I know a lot of wolves are resorting to a packless life these days, which is perhaps why hostile rogue activity has spiked so much. It's smart, stealing people away because they don't want to conform to traditional werewolf ways of living. But I must say I can't quite agree with the concept. People should be given their own independence. The world is changing, and so we can't stop ours from evolving either."

I listened to him carefully, drawn and captured by his way of thinking. I couldn't say I agreed with him, because if I did, it would go against everything I was raised to believe in. Instead, I found myself interested in the way he thought. So instead of commenting on his opinion regarding what my father and I were doing, I opted to answer his question. It was, perhaps, one of the only rare occasions I did not lie to him.

"A long time ago my mother left the pack in which she grew up after she met her mate. He was human, and therefore not used to werewolf customs... or werewolves in general. She left her home for him. Sometimes I wonder if it was her best decision. Goddess knows she might have lived longer if she hadn’t left."

"Lived longer?" Lucien asked before throwing the butt of his cigarette onto the ground and stamping on it. I gazed towards him and was surprised to find that intense, unnerving look on his face, and so I avoided his eyes again.

"My family died when I was younger. So, I've spent most of my life by myself." I said. And as I recalled the memory of losing them, I felt a sharp pain develop in my chest, one which I had been warding off for years. I gently pressed at my chest bone and let out a heavy sigh. Then suddenly, Lucien did something I never quite expected. He reached out towards me, grabbed at my hands and pulled me toward him, bringing my body right up against his chest. I was startled by the sudden contact and found myself stiffening against him. And as he held me tighter against him, I realised that I was unable to understand the reason for his behaviour. Firstly, Lucien was still in the very early stages of getting to understand and know me, and so I doubted he liked me enough to hold me like this without a good reason. Secondly, I had not shown any signs of being in any emotional pain. I had not cried, nor shown any sign of hurt on my face. And so, hugging me out of sympathy also did not quite make sense either.

But despite my confusion, I took a strange liking to the feeling of being held by him. It was warm and light and soft. Never before had I been held this way. Then, something unexpected happened. My arms began lifting slowly, almost by instinct, and I was soon clutching onto him as well. Surprisingly, he didn't reek of smoke, as I expected him to. There was only a subtle scent of it, but it was overshadowed by his own strong scent.

"It's hard, losing family. I'm sorry that you've been alone all this time." He whispered gently, leaned down and placed his soft lips against my forehead.

*What was he doing? What was the reason for his affectionate behaviour?* Again, I found myself unable to understand, unable to grasp at the reasons for his care. Eventually I grew so frustrated, that I had no choice but to ask.

"Why are you... embracing me?"

"Does it make you uncomfortable?"

I hesitated before answering, unable to gather or control my own thoughts. "N-no. I'm just confused."

Lucien chuckled softly, kissed at my forehead again and then said, "I figured, since you've been alone for most of your life, that you had forgotten what a warm embrace feels like. I just wanted to remind you. You don't have to be so cold all the time, Tristan. Doesn't it feel good being warm like this? Doesn't it feel good being held like this, being protected?"

I never answered him, and so he resumed speaking- because he clearly liked the sound of his own voice as well- which only made me more confused.

"Goddess have mercy on whoever lays a finger on a single strand of your hair... especially those rogues. That will be the day I release hell on Earth and eternally damn myself and everyone with me."

This time I looked up into his eyes, hoping to find answers within them, but was met by that same intense gaze. Instead of avoiding it though, I let it consume me as I asked, "You'd care if I were hurt?"

Lucien scoffed, as though the question itself was preposterous. "You're the one person in the world I'm allowed to protect, so of course I'd care. Like it or not, you're bound to me forever, and I'd be damned if I let anyone hurt you. I may not be yours, but you were mine the second I laid eyes on you, and I'll do anything in my power to keep you unharmed."

And it was then that I realised that there was no way of me understanding Lucien. He was too confusing to comprehend and too complex to decipher. But I liked the idea of him being challenging and unique. In fact, the more time I spent in his company, the more difficult I found it to dislike him. Then again, my mission was not to dislike him, but to seduce him, and although I would have rather died than fall in love with him, there was nothing stopping me from finding him a little more than just tolerable. I found Oliver more than tolerable and I was nowhere near in love with him. Perhaps the same could be true for Lucien… Perhaps there was a way to enjoy his company without delving into the forbidden fountain of love. But at the same time, I wondered how genuine my enjoyment of his company would be when deep down I knew I was only using him to get what I wanted.