Chapter 61

Tyson
The spasms of the yearling buck as I drank it gave me a satisfaction that worried me… I should not like its fear, or the way I went about this… yet… its bleating end, and me *ripping it the fuck apart* as my wolf stopped the beating drum in my chest…. It quelled my hellfire, and my stomach finally stopped grumbling…
My clawed hands were covered in blood when I shifted. Well, to be fair the entire top half of my body. I thanked the gods Samira went to bed at 1am, I’d been out here all night. I didn’t even know what time it was, just that the moon was just starting to get low in the sky. The sun had not yet made dawn, so it was still late.
I reflected on my actions with regret now. Not even the soul was left, just scraps of blood and fur. That was why I hunted an animal and not a man…. I don’t think it right I kill some random innocent, and alter their afterlife when I am *fine* without indulging this!
The contradiction of slaying innocents while condemning my brother for it didn’t escape me either.
I was ashamed…. I didn’t give it a fair chance, nor did I chase it… I just wanted it.
I wanted it and I was *there*…. Just consuming it… I didn’t even wait for it to die… . I don’t even know If I had control…
Maybe I didn’t?
My whole life has consisted of suppression and control…. For the sakes of those around me I endure…. Except in that moment…
I scared myself at how much I enjoyed it…
I knew myself…. I’ll do this again. I looked at my clawed hands… How satisfied I was looking at them in this state… I terrified my servants with my wild appearance and unsightly grin. I couldn’t get the damn smile off my face.
There is no way around it. I’m going to have to resign to my office after this. I didn’t feel stable enough to go to bed, the whole reason for going out in the first place.
I’m *not* going to bed now!
I made my way back to the locker room, and my Royal Guard bowed, parting way as I casually went in, and turned on the hot water. As hot as it would go…. I had to brace myself against the tile, and dip my head down so the water could get my hair.
I used the soap they had down here, and I went to my office. I remained in just boxers. The feeling of fabric on my bare skin made it crawl…. My body wanted to be the beast, yet I need to remain the man. Nothing will get done if I shift again.
Plus I think I’ve given enough time… It was time to summon my parents. I know they knew where Kaizen was, and that he was likely safe for mom not to fuss. I’d given enough time… Any longer and I might not be able to do this right….
Any longer and I may need to be put down myself…
I felt mom’s hands on the sides of my face. On reflex I shook her off and away…. I can’t hurt her. I don’t know how far this ability goes… Is it everyone, is the reaping passive, or is it triggered when I stress, or hunger too much?
“Tyson you look… thinner.” She tried saying it nicely, trying to soothe me. I showed her respect by bowing my head, but I cannot let her embrace me…
“I endure.” I said almost sounding like a damn priest… I am no zealot… “Please have a seat… I can’t allow affection right now. It wouldn’t be fair.” I half lied… I didn’t want to tell her and break her heart. I know she’s already ashamed she produced a Child of the Night, a monster….
“I already know you want me to give you his location, but I can’t do that…. I don’t rightly know where they are.” She said truthfully. Her heart would have given her away… maybe. Mom’s a good liar; you kind of have to be mated to a god.
“I know you’ve had *some* contact with them mom. Tell me what you know.” I hesitantly took her hand and saw a flash of her on the phone…. “At least give me his phone number.”
“You’re asking me to condemn my child to die.” She said like a Luna. Dad appeared behind her.
“Don’t push your mother.” He growled.
“I wasn’t.” I said firmly. “I only ask Kaizen’s phone number.”
“I will not have you sending a raid team. I said I’d let you be a man, but I *won’t* let you raid their homes in the middle of the night.” Father crossed his arms, and we glared at each other a long time. I can’t take him….
But it didn’t mean I wouldn’t try. He challenged me in my own house, and dared me to do something about it.
“Stop the both of you …. For information so valuable, I want you to Promise you won’t bring chaos nor destruction to their happiness… As your Third, I have no place, nor right to ask anything of you, so I ask this as your mother.”
“I can promise that.” I said firmly. “I won’t involve the mortals… I only want Kaizen and hos thralls.”
“Here.” Said mom scribbling the number on some paper.
“You shouldn’t have given him anything. He’s a king; he should have been able to get a Shadow to give it.” Growled dad. Mom growled back.
“You know I have to.” She snapped. “Well, I *want* to… This needs to be finished. I’m *tired* of worrying about my babies…”
“…Sorry for putting you through this mom.” I said filled with a bit of genuine shame. “But I can’t ignore the additional deaths, nor can I pardon now…” I shook my head. “If he hadn’t killed Lupe…”
“I know.” They both said more or less at the same time.
Mom continued. “Just as when I killed Brutus, grandfather still had to punish us *both.* The issue is that there’s a trail of 29 murder charges and 4 counts of treason against him…. 25 Warriors… 4 Counsil staff….”
Why’d they have to kill council….?
“And I’m not charging him for the 20 or so Rogues.” I added.
“I almost forgot about that.” Said dad. “I know you avenge them for honor, but defending a traitor to condemn your brother isn’t noble…. It’s selfish. You should drop Lupe, since *actual* evidence was given.”