Chapter 34: Bryn

I hate to sound insecure about how many girls Sawyer has been with, but what girl would when you imagine hundreds of girls trapped all over him and…touching him the same way you have? It’s not a fair thought since we weren’t together then, but it makes me feel like just another number. How am I supposed to feel?

He seems to be sincere and I want to believe him, but maybe I just don’t trust him yet. I mean, we haven’t gone public with our relationship, so no one knows about us yet. Everything between us has been kept in this house, so he could still get propositioned all the time.

Uh! I hate this.

“Bryn?”

His voice brings me back from the spiral of thoughts I was about to drown in.

“Hm?”

“Are you okay?” He asks and I force a smile on my face.

“Of course I am. Now, let’s watch a movie.” I climb off his lap and decide to pick a romcom with Rebel Wilson.

She’s hilarious, and I love her! I watch the TV and try to not let Sawyer see me tense. He leans over and grabs my legs and resting them on his lap. Then he starts messaging my calves, which I stare at him with complete shock. What is he doing?

“So, this girl is in some sort of coma?” He asks, as if messaging my legs is completely normal.

“Uh…yeah sort of…” I stumble over my words when he hits a particularly sore part of my leg.

I’ve been doing a lot of running around campus trying to complete all the classes I need in order to finish my degree. I tried to cram as much into the first years as possible so I can cut my time here short and start looking for a job around the time of most draft picks. That has me wondering…

“Are you planning on finishing college before joining a team, or will you leave without finishing?” I ask suddenly.

Sawyer glances my way in confusion. “What?”

“If you get drafted, are you okay leaving college without a degree of any kind? Isn’t it good to have a backup in case sports don’t work out?” I’m not sure why I’m asking this right now, but I’m curious.

He looks a little unsettled by the question, but shrugs it off. “Hockey is my life, so I would leave in a heartbeat. I’ve studied long enough that I could probably finish a basic business degree online. That could be a backup option.”

I want to say that he should have a more secure plan, but I don’t want to fight. So for now, I let the subject go and try to focus on the movie again. Our food comes about halfway in and we enjoy it and Sawyer even laughs at a few of the funny scenes in the movie. All in all, it was a laid back night that felt light and…domestic. We even go to sleep that night fully dressed and cuddled together.

The days leading up to Sawyer’s first game are full of anxiety and a bit of snapping on his part. He claims it’s because he has to go without sex that whole week, but I think he’s nervous. As much as he likes to act like this being his last chance is no big deal. He has been doing everything possible to make sure he succeeds. He’s been working out at a slower pace and nothing too strainious. I’ve been cooking and preparing special meals for him to keep his energy up without crashing. The other guys have been great too. I was worried when we first met that they would give me a hard time, but we’ve grown to have equal respect for each other.

Now and then, one of them will make a comment that is some sort of playful dedication of love or admiration toward me, but I don’t take any of it to heart. They’re good guys and none of them have stepped over the line with me, probably because Sawyer threatened them. Coach doesn’t know about us yet, but Sawyer admitted to telling the guys. He also admitted that he makes sure at least one of them has an eye on me.

To that, I went on a rant about the invasion of privacy and respecting boundaries. The guys looked like scolded children by the time I was done and stormed out. Later, Sawyer apologized profusely and begged for me not to punish him too harshly. I settled on having him message my legs again, and my back. Since he is going without sex, I made sure to be naked and covered from the waist down for my message. He was cursing the whole time and ended up taking five minutes to force his hard on to disappear.

I guess being sex deprived makes the guys play harder. They have so much pent up frustration that they bring that into the game. I tried to explain to them that pent-up aggression doesn’t mean positive results. They could even take things too far if they aren’t careful. Sawyer could get carried away and injure himself again. None of them listen, but they take my ban on drinking seriously. None of them has taken a sip of alcohol the whole week. I know for a fact since I use a breathalyzer on them every day.

When game day arrives, the guys are so tense and ready to go; I worry that a fight might break out before the whistle is blown. I decide to rub some lavender essential oil on their chests to help calm them long enough for the game to start. This is a home game, so the guys and Coach sit in a room and watch game play of the other team until it’s time to get ready. I check on all the guys and instruct them on a few stretches for them to do.

An hour later and the guys are heading for the rink. I follow behind them and take my place near the Coach, so I’m ready to go if anything happens. There are medics here as well, but for minor things, I’m available.

The puck hits the ice, and it’s a blur of movement. I can tell right away that the team we’re up against is far more aggressive. They’re knocking our guys into the sides and tripping them up like baffling.

“Shit.” Coach hisses before yelling something toward the guys.

My eyes follow Sawyer as he moves over the ice, and I’m mesmerized by how graceful he is even after his injury. If he isn’t considered for the draft, then I know for a fact the whole process is rigged, and I would make sure everyone knows it.

Sawyer steals the puck away from the other team and the biggest guy on their team takes off behind Sawyer, trying to catch him. Sawyer tries to make a fancy move, and it ends with the guy body slamming him hard. I’m starting to get mad as the guy continues to single Sawyer out. Things get ugly when he shoves Sawyer one too many times. Sawyer pushes the guy hard, making the guy stumble slightly, but it’s enough to have the guy barreling toward Sawyer.

“Ah shit! Becket! Get your ass together!” Coach yells.

It’s too late. Sawyer and the guy are grabbing each other and wrestling. Soon more guys join in and there is chaos on the ice. Whistles are being blown, the crowd is changing from boos to excitement.

“Coach, we need to stop this. Sawyer’s leg could get injured again if they keep going like this.”

He sighs and walks over to the door leading out to the ice. With little effort, he throws the barrier door open and immediately walks onto the ice and. He doesn’t slip once and soon is pushing his way through the mess of players and helping separate them all. It takes some time, but soon the players start to calm down and Coach calls for a break so I can check on the guys.

Coach calls for a time out and all the guys pile into the seats behind me. They sit in the row of seats in front of me and I start to check them over. Thankfully, their helmets cover a small a good amount go their faces, but Sawyer has a bit of blood coming down from the corner of his eyebrow.

“Sawyer…” I hate seeing him hurt, but it isn’t serious enough to need stitches.

Instead, I clean his face and offer him some sips of a sports drink and then the whistle blows again and he’s on his feet.

The guys slide back onto the ice and stand in their positions and get ready for the puck drop. Sawyer hold sit together even when instigated, he’s amazing out there.