Chapter 38: Sawyer

Well shit.

I didn’t mean to say that, and now Bryn is looking at me like a scared rabbit.

“W-what?” Her voice is trembling.

It would be easy to pretend I meant to say something else, or act like she heard me wrong, but I won’t. I wanted to tell her and although I didn't plan to do it this way, I won’t take it back.

“I said it’s a good thing I love you- “

“You love me?” She squeaks.

“That’s what I said, didn’t I? So be grateful, or I’d spank your ass. Actually, I still can. Do you think we could fit in that bathroom?” I’m overloading her so she will stop freaking out, but she just keeps staring at me like I’ve lost my mind.

I wave my hand in front of her face and smile. “Breath B or you’ll pass out.”

She sucks in a deep breath and lets it out. “Sorry. I’m sorry but…I think I’m hallucinating or something.” She looks around like she’s trying to find clues to confirm it.

“You’re not hallucinating, Bryn. Now stop freaking out.” I grab her hand and set hold it on my lap.

She’s freaking out, but so am I. Her reaction isn’t what I was expecting. Not that I thought she would scream with joy and throw herself in my arms or anything, but the frightened animal expression has me doubting myself.

“Sawyer…”

“Look B, I’m not expecting you to say anything, okay? I didn’t mean to blurt it out like that. If you want to forget like it ever happened, we- “

I’m cut off when she grabs my chin and turns my head to face her. As soon as we’re eye to eye, she leans over and kisses me. It’s soft, just like her, and I can smell the watermelon lip balm she always wears. I reach out and hold her in the kiss with my hand on the back of her head. She moans softly and I curse the fact that we need to sit on this damn plane for the next two hours. The tiny bathroom is looking better now if it means I can fuck her in it.

“Ladies and gentleman we are ready to get on our way but first…”

The pilot goes through the usual list of emergency exits and all that shit, forcing Bryn to break our kiss and sit back in her seat. She buckles it and sets her hands onto of her book. I’m confused by how she’s acting, but I can’t exactly ask her with this guy talking so loudly. When he gets through his monologue, everyone is ready to go. I glance at Bryn and she’s smirking, but her eyes are faced forward.

“Why do you look so smug?” I ask her as I adjust my seat belt.

This chair is way too small.

“Because you love me.” She says as if that clears everything up.
“I did. So?”

“You, Sawyer Beckett, star hockey player and ladies' man just told me he loves me.” She says and her smirk turns into a full on smile.

“Alright, you don’t have to go into all that…”

She laughs and finally looks at me. “I never thought you would say that to me.”

“I could never say it to anyone else.” I admit, and fuck, does it sound cheesy?

I don’t care. She’s my girl and I’m going to be sure she and everyone else know it. In fact…

“We should post a photo of us going home.” I tell her and take out my phone. “We can announce our relationship now and everyone will freak out while we’re out of town.”

She laughs. “I doubt they will have it out of their system in a day or two, but if you’re sure, then okay!”

She leans closer to me and we smile at the camera, but before I can take the picture, she leans closer and says,

“I love you too.” I accidentally take the picture when I turn to her and she kisses me again.

The photo is perfect.

“Sir, can you turn off your phone, please?” A flight attendant says, and I quickly apologize and do as she asks.

My heart is racing right now. I feel like we’re already airborne and floating above the clouds. She loves me too. Holy shit! I’m not sure what to do now. When I glance over at Bryn, she’s opened her book and is reading it like nothing happened. How can she be so chill right now? I’m fucking freaking out! Not in a bad way, but…

We’re taking off and Bryn grabs my arm suddenly and squeezes it tight. “Uh, I hate take-off,” she says.

That’s something I didn’t know about her. Of course, we’ve never flown together. Now that I think about it, there is a lot we’ve never done together. We spend so much time at home that I Haven’t even taken her on a proper date! Shit.

“We need to go on a date.” I blurt out when she releases my arm.

“What?” She looks confused.

“We’ve never been on a date. Like at a fancy restaurant or a movie.” What sort of stuff do people do on dates?

I can only think of those two things!

“We don’t need to do all that. What we do together is perfect! I like watching movies on the couch with takeout…it’s very us.”

She’s right. Things like that are easy for us. She’s never complained or hinted that she wanted anything more. Not like other girls do and have done to me. Which was why I never really dated anyone. I didn’t want to shell out all sorts of money just so people could take photos of us eating somewhere. Bryn isn’t like that at all. She likes to hang out at home in her pajamas and read. Or she’ll watch game tapes with me so we can talk about how I can play smarter.

I can’t imagine any of those puck bunnies being happy to watch game tapes all night.

“Are you sure you’re not interested in a normal date?” I ask her just in case.

She gives me a look that says ‘really?’

“Sawyer, those kinds of things don’t need to be planned out. Monday is dinner together, Tuesdays is takeout, Wednesday is sex day, blah blah blah. It’s dumb. Let’s just do what we want when we want.”

“Sex day?” I ask.

She smacks me hard. “Ow!”

“Oh, that didn’t hurt. And yeah, don’t some couples schedule sex?”

I shrug. “I don’t know, but that sounds like a terrible idea. Planning one day for sex? Why not at least three days?”

She shakes her head. “You horny hockey player.”

I hear a gasp and look over to the rows of seats on the other side of the aisle from us and see a scandalized old woman. She’s looking straight at me and has her hand over her heart like she’s close to death from shock alone.

“What? Don’t tell me you never a good fucking grandma.” She gasps even louder and glances over at the man snoring next to her.

She shakes him awake and starts going off about what she heard and I just laugh until I’m smacked again.

“Ow, woman, that hurt!”

“Shut up! I can’t believe you just said that! Her poor old lady heart. You could have given her a heart attack.” Bryn says, looking at the woman with sympathy.

“Well, her husband looks close to death. I doubt much goes on in bed between those two.”

“Oh, my god.” Bryn throws her hands up and picks her book up again. “There is something seriously wrong with you.”

I smile and lean in to whisper in her ear. “Yeah, but you love me.”

She turns her head and nods. “I do.”

She’s smiling at me and I’m smiling at her, too. We’re caught in this moment, just the two of us, and I don’t think I’ve felt like this before. I feel true happiness. Like even if I lost hockey, I would still have her, and that is more than enough for me. So I lean in and kiss her again, because I can and I never want to stop.

Our plane is only delayed for an hour, but we finally make it to the airport. It’s late, so there aren’t too many people around, which makes it easy to spot Bryn’s dad.

“Dad!” she calls out and jogs toward him.

He bugs her and lifts her feet off the ground. Seeing them always made me wish to have that, but then I remember all the bad times and am glad my mom is free of the man who fathered me. It’s funny how when you’re a kid, you don’t see someone for who they really are. It’s easy to see them in one way, even when they hurt you, but now I can admit that we were better off without our dad. Besides, Bryn’s parents have been for us in ways my father never was. They helped mom and made sure to make us feel like we belonged in their family too.

I lock eyes with Bryn’s dad and it’s as if he can read my mind because he nods at me and smiles.

We don’t need words between us. He knows what I want, and he’s given me his approval.