Chapter 43: Sawyer

Things are moving at lightning speed now. Now that it’s in everyone’s head that Bryn and I are getting married, there is no changing anyone’s minds. Not that I ever would. Bryn told me her idea last night when we were laying on the small full sized bed in her old room. I had my hand on her belly the whole time, imagining what our baby will look like. She fell asleep not long after, but I stayed up and watched her. I couldn’t believe how things have changed so much.

All these years apart, but we still ended up here. We couldn’t fight fate, so why try? Maybe it was a blessing when we moved here. Bryn saved me and is now giving me an amazing gift. I just hope I can make her happy. Now more than ever, I have to get a contract on a pro team. Hockey isn’t as popular a sport as football, but the pay isn’t bad and I could take care of my family. Zach would also offer to help me find a job if it came down to it, but I hope that’s long after I’m too old to play hockey.

I wish I could convince Bryn to let me take care of her so she wouldn’t have to work, but I know how much that work means to her. How could I ask her to accept my dreams and then give up her own? That would make me a hypocrite and the worst husband ever.

Husband…

I never thought I would be married before. I was thirty, if at all. Now we’re planning a shot gun wedding before we have to report back to school. Thankfully, since this is a small town, it wasn’t hard getting the marriage certificate and Bryn’s dad will be our officiant. Apparently, all you have to do is go on a website and you can be certified. Crazy, but possible. Bryn’s sister still had her wedding dress and fixed it up for Bryn to wear.

Bryn refused to let her sister change the dress, but Poppy was insistent and pulled it out last night from storage and has been working on it all night. We have to be back at school by tomorrow night, so the quickie ceremony is going to be tomorrow morning. That gives us today to get everything we need. Which isn’t much given the time crunch, but the family still wants it to feel like a wedding so the women have set off on a trip to Main St. The guys are on babysitting duty. Zach has been so kind as to let me handle Milly myself as a look into what my future will be like. Asshole.

The big difference, though, is that we’ll be having a son, and he won’t be as cranky as Milly is. She clearly hates all men, and hasn’t been shy about letting us know. I don’t think she’s stopped crying since the girls left.

“I’m going to the hardware store to pick up the stuff on Poppy’s list. She wants us to build an arch for flowers or something. I’m not sure.” Zach is looking through his messages, so I peek over his shoulder and see Poppy has sent him all kinds of pictures.

“Seems a little excessive.” I say just as Milly reaches across my chest and grabs onto her dad’s shirt. “Looks like the princess wants her dad.”

“Nice try, bro, but I have work to do.” He turns and grabs Milly’s hands and waves them around. “Daddy will be back, baby girl. Be nice to Uncle Sawyer!”

He kisses her on the cheek and leaves without glancing back. If he did, he would have seen me flipping him off and mouthing curse words at him. The confident way he’s striding away tells me he knows all too well what I’m doing. As soon as he’s out the door, Milly starts up again.

“Come on, kid, can’t you go easy on Uncle Sawyer? I’ve held a baby like three times in my whole life, and you know because you’re the only baby I’ve ever held!” That does nothing to calm her down.

“You have to relax, son. She can sense your anxiety,” Bryn’s dad says.

He walks over to us and takes Milly from me. She latches onto his thin t-shirt and is crying so hard her face is turning red. He rocks in place and hums some song I don’t know, and Milly turns to look at him. Slowly, she calms down, and she watches him like he’s the most fascinating thing she’s ever seen.

“See, just stay calm. You’ll get the hang of it.”

I blow out a breath and drop on the nearest soft surface. “I don’t know. Our kid is going to be better behaved than this princess. She’s the only baby in the family, so she gets all the attention. Maybe she’s just a little too spoiled.”

Bryn’s dad laughs. “Maybe, but all babies cry and get upset. It can be frustrating when no one understands what you want. Don’t worry though, I know you’ll be a good dad.”

I consider that for a second. “How do you know? I mean, my dad wasn’t a great example. What if I turn out like him?”

“Tell me, son, would you run out on Bryn and leave her alone with a baby to raise on her own? Think carefully because you’re about to commit to a lifetime with someone and that shouldn’t be taken lightly. I don’t just mean that because I will have to kill you if you hurt my daughter, but can you see yourself ever hurting her in that way?” He asks.

I shake my head. “No way.”

He nods. “Yet you left and didn’t speak to her for several years. So how do you know whatever kept you away then won’t happen again?”

It’s a fair question. One that Bryn has asked for, too. Truthfully, I have never dived deep into the reason I never contacted her back then. I was being honest when I said I was being stupid, but it was more than that.

“I never want to hurt Bryn like that again. Back then, I was trying so hard to make a name for myself in hockey that I lost sight of who I was. I guess, in a way, Bryn represented the old me I was trying to get rid of, but I would still look for her. Any time I saw her with a guy, I would make a scene or threaten the guy to back off. I told myself that it was me protecting her, but I know now it’s because I didn’t want to see her with anyone. Then we met again and that same feeling crept up. Seeing her with other guys made me furious. Even if I wasn’t ready to admit it, it’s been obvious that Bryn was the girl I’ve always wanted.” I tell him.

He smirks and nods his head. “Sounds all too familiar. Did I ever tell you how me and Addie met?”

I shake my head.

“We went to the same high school together. She was a shy, quiet thing that no one talked to or hung out with, but I zoned in on her immediately. I was a jock just like you and my friends liked making jokes about her, and I laughed because that’s what was expected. Then we got assigned to a project together. She smiled at me that day and spoke so softly that I had to move closer just to hear her. We spent a whole week with each other after school, working on that project. Once it was over, I realized I missed spending time with her. She was the most interesting person I’d ever met, but you wouldn’t have known because of how quiet she was. I watched her open up when we were together, but once it was all done, she went back to being alone and I went back to my friends. Still, I would see her around and want to talk to her, but I wasn’t sure if she wanted me to. Then when my friends started saying shit about her, I got mad, and told them never to speak about her like that again. A few days later, I saw one of the guys on my team hitting on her and the other guys laughing. I knew they were up to something, so I walked over and kissed her. I told everyone that she was my girl and no one goes near her.”

I laugh at the image of Mr. R threatening a bunch of guys. He’s such a chill man it’s hard to visualize.

“So you guys were high school sweethearts?”

He chuckles. “Not exactly. At least not at first. After I kissed her, she dragged my ass outside and laid into me. She told me I was an idiot for letting those guys get the best of me, and that if I wanted to kiss her, then I should have asked. She was fuming and still the cutest thing I ever seen. So I asked her if I could kiss her and she said only if I’m the only girl I ever kiss again. She was.”

“Sounds like a good relationship.”

He shrugs. “We had our rough patches. Like when I got recruited to play ball for Seattle. Addie was still in school and on her way to college, and I had a decision to make. I could play ball or I could stay with Addie and get a job. To me, the choice was easy. We got married as soon as she graduated and went on to college together.”

Shit. That sounds all too familiar…