Chapter 73: Sawyer

Bryn is pissed and I can’t say I blame her. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking in that hospital room. No, I know what I was thinking. The guy who brought her to the hospital said he was a TA for one of her medical classes, which means he knows enough about the body to take care of someone. At least that’s where my mind went. The fact that Bryn had been rushed to the hospital while I was stuck at practice had me thinking once again about what would happen to her if I wasn’t around all the time. Maddox wouldn’t be enough. She needs a whole team of people to take care of her and the baby. So that means bringing more guys into our relationship.

Shit, I don’t know what made me think any of that was a good idea, but I can’t make sense of my recent thoughts. There is this panic inside me that something will happen to her and she’ll be alone. It scares me, and in my panicked state I let some stupid shit drop out of my mouth.

I wonder how long she’s going to be mad at me for. Would bribing her with her favorite cupcakes be too much? It wouldn’t hurt, I guess. I pull the food delivery app up on my phone and select her favorite cafe and order four of her favorite treats from there plus one of those sweet blended decaf coffee drinks she likes. All vegan and she makes really sexy moaning sounds when she enjoys them. Not that she will let me touch her today or any day until her fury has dissipated. For now, I will just have to enjoy watching her.

The front door opens and I quickly place the order and lock my phone so she won’t see what I’ve been up to.

“Hey! How did it go?” I call out over my shoulder from where I’m sitting on the couch.

I’m trying to play things cool, but what I really want to do is jump up and grab my girl and check every part of her to make sure she’s okay. I don’t because she’s mad, and me invading her space won’t help. She appears in my peripheral vision, so I turn my head to look at her. My heart picks up every time I look at her, but now it’s because I’m not sure where I stand with her. I never want to upset her to where she won’t want me to be a part of her life.

She moves to stand in front of me and my hands twitch because of how strong the urge to reach out for her is. I don’t say anything when she looks down at me. She doesn’t look angry right now, but I’m not sure what that means.

Should I say something?

“B- “

“Don’t.” She says, and I snap my mouth shut.

She sighs and walks closer to me and climbs onto my lap. My arms automatically wrap around her and her arms come around my neck. Our eyes are focused on each other, but neither of us says anything. It isn’t until she lets out another sigh and leans closer and rests her forehead against mine.

“Sawyer, I’m not sure what has you feeling like. I need all kinds of men to be happy, but I know you would’t do this without a reason. I don’t care what that reason is, though.” She pulls back and looks me in the eyes again. “I’m happy with how things are right now. If anything changes, then fine, but this is new and I’m still trying to wrap my head around it. If there is someone else I find interesting, then I will discuss it with you, but until then, can we handle what’s happening right now? Just because we are okay with this arrangement, id doesn’t mean some random stranger will be. So let’s not jump into a whole other set of changes before we’ve settled the one we’re currently in. Okay?”

“Yeah. Shit B, I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s been going on in my head, but you’re right. This is about the three of us and making this happen. I mean, if everyone is still in agreement.” I look over at Maddox and he nods.

“I’m in, but I reserve veto power before another asshole joins this family.” He grumbles with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face.

Bryn laughs. “Calm down, big guy. We don’t need to worry about that for a while, and of course you get a say. Now…since that’s been discussed, I have something to tell you. I’ve decided how we can both announce our baby and Maddox being a part of our family all in one post on Instagram.”

I raise a brow at her. “Oh yeah? How?”

She smiles and explains her idea. It’s smart, especially the part about turning off comments. I’m sure we will get all kinds of whispers when we go out, but if we can minimize the hurtful words Bryn might see, then I’m on board. We spend the rest of the night we mess around with taking different photos to post on social media. Bryn enjoys her cupcakes but gets sleepy after and goes to bed early, leaving Maddox and I alone.

“What the fuck were you thinking, man?” He asks when we both have a beer in our hands and are watching some random movie on TV.

“I wasn’t.” I admit.

“No shit. You made a real mess. It’s a good thing she didn’t decide to hold it against you.”

I laugh. “She wouldn’t. Not that I enjoy her being mad at me, but she isn’t a normally angry person. She also doesn’t hold grudges. We fought a lot growing up, but when we fixed things, that was it. We didn’t resist that fight or let it keep us apart.”

“That nice and all but kids' problems and the kinds of things we’ll be dealing with now are very different.” He says and I nod.

He’s right. This isn’t a friendly disagreement. What we do now could affect our futures a lot more than when we were kids. Fuck, we’re bringing our own kid into this screwed up world, so we can’t be fucking things up now.

“You’re right. I was being stupid, and I deserved worse from her, but I’m glad she wanted to tell everyone about the baby. She’s worried about what these things could do for my career, but all I want to do is tell everyone and show her off. I don’t want her to have to hide or lie about anything in our lives. Fuck if I don’t get a contract. I’ll work with my brother if I have to. She thinks my dreams revolve around hockey, but things are different now. Her and that baby mean more to me than hockey ever will.” I say.

“Glad to hear it, man.” I look over at Maddox and try to figure out what has him looking like, the beer he’s drinking just turned bad. “What?”

He glances my way for a second, but then looks down at his beer and sighs. “I want to be here for her in any way I can, but maybe it shouldn’t be as…what would I be? Her lover? It doesn’t make sense for me to be more than a friend.”

“Too late for that, brother.” I open my social media account and turn my phone so he can see what Bryn posted before passing out for the night.

She had us bring out a tripod, and we took a photo of her standing between us and each of us, resting a hand on her belly and kissing her cheek. It’s lame as fuck, but she loved it.

“Shit. It’s real then.” He says with a weak laugh.

He runs his hands through his hair nervously, but there’s a smile on his face.

“You know where you stand with her. So both of you need to stop questioning everything and just relax. I don’t have any doubt that we can make this work, so you guys shouldn’t either.” I tell him and tip my beer at him. “We’re brothers now.”

“We always were man.”

We don’t talk much more after that, and once the movie ends, we make our way to the bedroom and climb in on either side of Bryn. She immediately curls into my side and wraps her arms and legs around me. Maddox spoons her from behind and we stay like that the whole night. When I wake up though, my mind is working a thousand miles a minute. Zach and I made some good money on the last investment we made. We need to do more. If I don’t play hockey, then I want to have a nest egg at my disposal for our family.

I grab my phone and call Zach.

“Hey bro. What’s up?” He says when he answers.

“We need to talk.” I tell him.

It’s time to grow up and make some adult decisions.