Chapter 53: Sawyer

Our next game creeps up too quickly. Or maybe this whole week has been so busy that I didn’t notice. Bryn had a doctor’s appointment where we got to hear the baby’s heart beast and make sure the little guy was doing okay. Bryn hasn’t been getting as sick as before and the doctor said by the time she moves into her second trimester…whatever that means…she might not get sick at all now. She also said her being exhausted is normal and might actually get better for a few weeks until about the third trimester.

She said a lot of medical shit that I didn’t understand, but Bryn and the baby are good, so that’s all that matters.

We’ve been practicing hard for the game we have this coming Friday, and it has me slipping into bed with Bryn and crashing without trying to feel her up. It isn’t often that we go to bed without at least some heavy making-out action. At first it felt weird, but I had also never slept in a bed with a girl over night until Bryn and I got together. I realize I don’t have to act desperate to get things going because she will be in my bed the next night and the next. The urgency to have sex has gone down, but it hasn’t slowed us down completely. In fact, Bryn has been starting things a lot more.

I can’t complain there, but as her belly has grown, we’ve had to get creative. No more flipping her over on her stomach and slamming into her. Now I have to get her on all fours, which is way fucking hotter. So yeah, I’m not complaining.

Her old pajamas that were these tiny shorts and a tank top have gotten a lot sexier, too. The top shows off her growing tits nicely, and it rides up a little because of her stomach. Some guys might find their pregnant girl less attractive in pregnancy, but Bryn looks as sexy as ever. I also feel a weird sense of pride seeing what I did to her. Some weird caveman shit, but I’m not ashamed of it. My wife is sexy as fuck and growing my kid. What’s not to be proud of?

Her belly barely showed until recently, so she was able to wear most of her old clothes. Now every morning she comes out of the closet with a huff and a pout. She whines about another piece of clothing not fitting and then tries again to make it happen. It’s fucking cute, and I promised her we would take a trip to Target (her favorite store) and get her some cute pregnancy clothes and shit.

That put a smile on her face.

“Alright baby, you lead the way.” I tell her when we walk into the store. “I don’t know shit about this place.”

She gasps and gives me a shocked look. “What? You’ve never been inside a target before?”

“Uh no. Why would I?” I ask with a shrug.

“Where do you shop then?” She asks as she pushes the cart to the opposite side of the store.

“I don’t know. Amazon or shops in the mall.”

She sighs and shakes her head. “So sad. This place has everything! See, you can shop for bananas and then walk across this section to shop for a bathing suit!”

I look around the area we’re in and take it in. She’s right. This area alone has produce, toilet paper and make-up.
“Not sure if this is genius or weird as shit.” I grumble.

“It’s awesome and makes things so much easier. Hey you want to see something cool?” Her eyes light up with excitement.
How in the hell can I say no to her?

“Sure.”

She squeals and does a little happy dance before pushing the cart toward the back of the store. I follow behind her and happen to see another guy doing the exact same thing. Our eyes meet and we tilt our heads at each other like we’re in this shit together. Bryn leads me through an aisle map until I start seeing tiny clothes and all sorts of toys.

“We can shop for the baby here too! See? There are clothes, diapers, cribs and even toys for the little one! Isn’t that awesome! I should buy something.” She starts sifting through a section of clothes, and I shake my head and grab her hand.

“We don’t know what the baby will be yet. Maybe we should wait to buy all this until we know. We don’t want to have a pink princess room and then put our son in it, do we?”

She pulls her hand away and places it with the other on her hips. “Sawyer Raven. So what if our son wants a princess room? Does that mean you’ll love him any less?”

I hold my hands up. “That’s not what I’m saying. I’ll love our kid no matter what, but shouldn’t we wait and let him decide what he likes on his own? Do we have the right to force that on him?”

She narrows her eyes on me, but then lets out a defeated breath. “You’re right. He should decide on his own when the time comes. Maybe we can find some gender neutral stuff. How about woodland animals? They’re super cute!”

“I don’t know what that would look like, but sure. Anything you want.” She perks back up and starts walking around, searching for anything that has a small animal on it. “Do girls like dinosaurs?” I ask when I see a white thing with a multicolored dinosaur riding a skateboard.

Bryn comes over and smiles when she sees it. “This is freaking awesome. I think it would be cool. I liked dinosaurs growing up, so yeah! Should we buy it?”

I smile at her and lean in for a kiss. “Yeah, let’s get it.”

She does her little dance again but then her happy expression fell. “We should probably budget, so we don’t go crazy buying stuff.”

I wrap my arm around her and kiss her again. “Don’t worry about a thing. I have enough money to pay for this. I might not be rich but I’ve been saving for a while and have a scholarship to play hockey. Zach helped me invest some money, and it allowed me to buy the apartment and my new truck. We don’t have to worry for now.”

“What? You have money saved up? Shouldn’t that stop you from being eligible for a scholarship?” She asks.

I shake my head. “Zach keeps it all in a savings account for me linked to his bank account.” I pause and try to keep my expression neutral. “Our dad has been sending us money since he left and at first we didn’t want it, but then Zach figured we should put it away just in case. He picked a few good investments and our money has been growing little by little. It’s a nest egg of sorts, but we aren’t millionaires. Sorry.”

She shakes her head and lifts herself up on her toes to wrap her arms around my neck and kiss me. Her small belly makes it a little more difficult for her to reach me, so I duck my head to meet her part way.

“I don’t care how much money you have, Sawyer. I never expected to be rich, so why would I care if you are? All I care about is us doing what we love. So don’t worry. We’ll always have exactly what we need.”

“I think I love you.” I tell her and she smiles up at me.

“I know I love you. Always have.” She says without hesitation.

“Really? Always? Even when I was an asshole to you?”

She sighs. “Unfortunately yes. I should have hated you, but I couldn’t. I felt hurt, but you were still my Sawyer, no matter what. Even if you moved on and had a happy life with another girl…you would always be mine. I always wanted you to be happy, even if that meant me not being in your life anymore.”

My chest starts to ache like a rock hit me. She loved me even when I hurt her and would have loved me even if I never made it back to her. I would have been a selfish bastard living my life while she would watch from the outside, always wishing it had been her. That kills me.

“I could never have been happy without you, B.” I say, but she laughs softly.

“You would have. So many girls threw themselves at you, and one would steal your heart and give you cute babies. I can see a whole other life you could have had- “

I cover her mouth before she can say any more. “Don’t. Don’t think about what life I would have had. The only life I want is with you. So get that shit out of your head. No one but you will ever be my girl.”