CHAPTER 32: WOUNDS OF THE PAST

I stayed at Penelope’s side the whole evening. I didn’t leave her side nor a minute removed my eyes from her, occasionally checking her condition and putting comfort in her sleep by gently patting a damp cloth on her face and arms. I disregarded my own drowsiness and treated her with special care, just like how I treated my patients.


I didn’t plan to be wide awake the entire night and looked after her while sleeping, but there were a few more hiccups of painful statements that she unconsciously murmured, which led me to settle in her room and watch her closely. I would only be restless if I left her on her own, so I decided to stay.


I remembered myself in her, too intoxicated and wasn’t aware of my surroundings, during the night after I discovered and witnessed how my fiance was cheating on me with my best friend. I remembered all the pain, how it tightly gripped my heart and ruthlessly shattered it into shards, with what I witnessed earlier in Penelope’s actions.


All the painful details of that day came back inside my head like haunted nightmares clawing me in my sleep and like avenging tides that raged at the sea on a stormy night. I never thought it would ever resurface again after almost five years that had passed by. I thought I got over the nightmares as the years went on.


*Flashback*


A week from now was Antonette’s birthday, but I wanted to surprise her by dropping to her apartment unannounced. Due to my hectic schedule as Mr. Hunt’s personal physician and assistant, I admit that it had been a while since the last time I surprised her and dated her out. Today wasn’t quite a busy day, so I decided to make it up to her and asked her out personally. I knew her work schedule by heart and today was her day off.


Everything was all set. Early on, I already reserved a table for two at a fancy and high-end restaurant where I knew she would be delighted and overwhelmed. It was a fine dining restaurant near the beach where I am perfectly aware that she loves the most. I am seldom given the opportunity to have an unoccupied day due to Mr. Hunt’s condition, so I would definitely seize this moment to spend it with the woman of my dreams and the one I was destined to marry months from now.


I couldn’t contain the excitement I felt, because I knew perfectly that my untimely arrival will incredulously stupefy and bedazzle her. My mind was filled with visions of her angelic face expressing shock and bewilderment, as well as beaming with utmost joy and delight.


As I was on my way to her apartment, I remembered the day I first beheld her extraordinary beauty and charm. She was one of my patients’ family members and everything started there. She answered my prayers and accepted me as her boyfriend after a year of endless courtship. From that day on, everything around me was bright and rainbow-filled. We had been in a relationship for almost six years when I proposed to her, to which she immediately said yes. Marrying her and being my wife was my goal in life now. I wanted to spend forever with her, be the mother of my children while we fulfill our dreams together and grow old in each other's love. Without a shadow of a doubt, she was my soulmate, because we were in sync in so many ways and blended with each other perfectly.


Without prolonging the intense feeling of anticipation and thrill, I swiftly alighted my car the moment I arrived at the foot of her apartment’s building. Carrying a bouquet of white tulips, which was her favorite flower, I happily walked towards the entrance and made my way to the elevator. Everyone who was with me inside the compact space were smiling at me while gazing at the one I was dearly holding. The smile at the corners of my lips didn’t leave my face and carried it with me while I headed out on her floor.


Once in front of her apartment door, I fetched the spare key she gave me inside my trouser’s pocket. Dimness welcomed me the minute I silently opened the door. I smiled wider at the sight of it while shaking my head with amusement. Antonette was always known for her thriftiness. She’d rather conserve power, especially when she was alone with herself. The silence and the homey atmosphere her place exudes always puts my mind at ease. It always makes me daydream of how she would be the time we get married.


I let myself in and walked straight towards her room without changing the dimness of my surroundings. Full of life and eager to behold her astonishment, I slightly opened the door before taking a peek. Her bed was still in utmost order, uncrumpled and meticulously fixed. I heard the splashing of water that came from her shower, which was at the corner of her room. The bathroom door was left open. Not wanting to disturb her privacy, I sat at the foot of her bed and waited patiently for her to come out.


I was sitting for quite some time while quietly staring at the bouquet, thinking of her initial reaction at the sight of me, when all of a sudden I heard a deep and hair-raising moan coming from the bathroom. My forehead hastily creased and I sharpened my ears at the sound I heard. It was a female voice sweetly moaning and whispering in ecstasy.


I laughed at myself while slowly shaking my head, thinking that she might suddenly felt horny and wanted to ease off the heat by touching herself. I couldn’t blame her. It had been a while since we last made love. And besides, just like anyone else, she also has cravings and erotic desires that sometimes I can’t fulfill as much as I wanted to.


After a little longer of hearing her delicious cries of lust and salacious desires, another heavy and panting moan was heard from within, but this time it wasn’t from her. It didn’t come from her, but it was a man’s voice. Calling her name in succession and cursing loudly while moaning hoarsely, which immediately jolted me off the bed.


In an instant, my feet had a mind of its own and headed swiftly towards the wide open bathroom. It was deeply occupied with the moans that come from two different sound quality. I could feel my heart thumping in an extremely rapid pace as if there were race horses running in speed while my body was sweating and shaking with tremendous nervousness and fear.


I was a step away from seeing what’s inside when I heard Antonette’s rasp voice pleading exasperatedly. “Deeper please! Aah! Yes, yes! That’s it, Matthew! Fuck me senselessly!”


I took a step back after hearing her words. Hardly believing what I heard as anger filled my heart, not only for the only woman I loved the most and put at the pedestal all my life, but also for the man she called Matthew. My mind was immediately specter with thick dark clouds as I tried to control the scornful rage within me.


I don’t know what had gotten into me, but I made a bold step and took sight of the inside, which I wished I didn’t. My jaws literally clenched with enormous fury, together with my hands as I witnessed the treachery that was happening. I could feel every muscle and ligament inside of me contracting with utmost disgust and wrath. My brain was exploding in tons of why as I quietly stared at the two sinful souls, who weren't fully aware of their surroundings and were mindful of their lasciviousness.


Leaning on the wall with eyes closed and mouth widely open, was Antonette, all naked in her birth suit and drenched in water from the free-falling shower. Behind her and also with eyes completely shut closed, was Matthew, who happened to be my only best friend, was now forcefully pounding my fiance and grinding his dick at her rear while heavily moaning and seemed in a trance.


I couldn’t suppress the anger any longer. I would be having a heart attack if I didn’t burst it out this instant. Grabbing whatever I could hold at the bathroom sink near me, I swiftly threw a bottle of what I think was a lotion at them. It hit Matthew’s arms, which made him look at me with dreaded fright and utmost consternation.


“ASSHOLES! FUCKING PIGS!”


“Lewis! I… I can explain, buddy!”


“Lewis!” Antonette shouted frantically before frightfully covering her nakedness, using Matthew’s body as her cover up.


“EXPLAIN? EXPLAIN THIS YOU THICK-FACED MOTHERFUCKER!”


Without saying anything else, I rushed towards them and gave my asshole and traitor best friend a taste of my furious knuckle. I punched him several times, not wanting to stop as I heard Antonette’s pleas and cries at his back. He succumbed at his feet and laid on the floor with an unrecognizable face, which was stricken with blood.


“Lewis! Don’t kill him! Please, please!”


My eyes set upon the woman who I thought didn’t have the nerve to betray me and who I trusted all my life with. I stared at her with utmost disgust and loathe. I have never hit a woman my entire life, because of high regards to them and fear of God, but in every rule there’s an exemption and tonight, deep rage brings about the devil inside me that I never imagined existed. I slapped Antonette with all my might, causing the corner of her lip to bleed and making her slump on the floor next to her kept boy.


“How could you do this to me, Antonette! I trusted you all my life! We’re engaged, for Christ’s sake! If I only knew how a slut you are, I never would have loved you the way I did and spent those years of putting you on the pedestal! You sickened me! You make me want to puke the life out of me!”


“I’m sorry, Lewis! I got carried away! Forgive me, please! I love you, Lewis, please give me another chance! Let’s fix this. I promise, I will be faithful to you more than I ever did in the past. Please forgive me, my love, I’m deeply sorry!”


“Carried away? Forgive you? Fix? Fix what! Do you hear what you are saying, Antonette? Are you even in your right mind now? Who would forgive you with what you had just done?” She was about to crawl towards me, but my ultimatum made her stop from doing so. “Don’t you dare come near me, Antonette. I may not contain myself and kill you with my bare hands. You disgust me to the brim! I no longer want to see your face again, not even a silhouette of yours!”


Without further ado, I hastily removed the ring she gave me, which according to her was her symbol of eternal love for me and threw it to her face. I stared at her one last time before marching with heavy steps away from them.


*Flashback Concluded*


From that day onwards, I removed Antonette from my life. I started living my life the way I did, before the day I met her. I suffered a lot that I almost took my own life because of regret and misery, but gladly surpassed those agonies and grieves as years passed. I didn't expect that it would haunt me again tonight as I witnessed Penelope’s sufferings. I dig deep inside my heart, searching for any signs of pain from within. The wounds of the past were still there, but I’d be damned if I let it resurface again now that I completely got over Antonette for such a longtime.