Over And Over Again

Cynthia opens the letter she was holding first the air around us is cool and stale as if the next moment one of us takes a breath it will blow the others over.
Her eyes scan the paper before she reads it, we are waiting for her to read it out loud, but she seems lost in the words .

"Cynthia what does it say ?" I press her pulling her eyes away for just a second.

She looks up her eyes watery her breath a little shallow like she is in shock.

"*This Letter is from Dad give me a second and I’ll read it to you both*" She wipes a stray tear from her eyes but she’s smiling .

**To my Darling Girls ,
If you've found this like i knew my brilliant daughters would it means your mother and i are no longer with you and the man we feared the most is coming . Girls Arlo will stop at nothing to get the powers each of you hold. He tore through your mothers pack like they were nothing but you are all stronger than you know and braver than you think. When your Mother and I made a deal with the goddess we knew you would be special but we had no idea just how wonderful you would become we saw the light in your eyes when you were all small babies.
I wish I could be in this fight with you to protect you and keep you all from harm , You must know that Arlo is no longer human nor wolf his need for power has created something worse he is a wolftaur forever stuck between his two form, and his desire to take the power of the first is what drives him the most.
Through the years your mother and I have searched for way to kill him to end the slaughter and we may have found something in this envelope I have placed some pages of a book we only found these few and they have the mark of your mothers pack . The symbols shine in the moonlight and when you find the missing piece your mother is sure it will reveal a way to kill him .
I do not know how far into this fight you are, but I pray you have found the other half of the page.
You girls are my everything my entire world and I will be watching over you in this life and in the next .
I love you all so much my daughters of the moon
Dad x ***

Cynthia tips the envelope and more paper comes out I scramble to pick them up my hands trembling with the hope that this is the missing pages from the book I found .

I turn them over and they are the pages from the book I found in Calder library we found them , tears fall from my eyes like a waterfall it’s all I can do I’m so overwhelmed finally we have something the last few weeks have gone by in a blur and finally we have might have a way to end this fight , this whole time we were going to fight with no end goal and now .

"This is it this could be the thing that saves us , if this tells us how to kill Arlo, we could avoid a fight all together "

Both my sisters are staring down at me smiles on their faces the elation I know I feel seeping from them to a warm glow of happiness surrounding all of us .
We all wipe our tears and take a quiet moment to each read the letter and look at the papers , seeing my father’s handwriting makes me miss him so much more.
Artemis is the first to pick up my mother’s letter all of us are apprehensive about this we have no idea what could be in here and she knows more about what we are than anyone.
**
Arti opens the letter and scans over it and her eyes fill with tears all over again but again they are happy tears.

**My Precious moon babies
I am so sorry that I am no longer with you , that I’m not there to guide you through this life and through the gifts you will grow to have.
By now I hope you know what you all are and what you are born of , I have so much I want to say to you in this letter, but I fear time is running out .
As I write this rogues are testing the borders in this pack , it is likely that your father and I will have to leave and fight them and I know it will be the end for us but the sacrifice will be worth it to keep you safe Arlo has fixated on my family and your father and I made sure our children were kept a secret I hope the sacrifice that we will inevitably have to make will keep you hidden a little longer.
I am not naive in thinking that if you have found this my worst fears have been realized and he has found you enclosed in the box is some papers I managed to salvage from my former life with images and annotations for the gifts you may grow to have .
I often wish I could have bought you up surrounded by the stories of your ancestors to use them to guide you into your powers but it was not destined to be and our lives with you have been better than we could have ever hoped.
I love the three of you more than you can imagine my gifts from the goddess and I want you to know that I times of peril trust your wolves it is said that in our line our wolves carry the memories of those before us.
Trust them to guide you to do what’s right .
All of my love in this life and the next
Mum x
**

Hot tears are pouring down my face now the pain in my chest tightening with every breath .

Our parents knew all along that they would eventually have to die when they left that day, they knew they wouldn't be coming back , they knew that we would be eating dinner alone from that day on wards.

I look up at Artemis and Cynthia both their faces showing the deep voided sadness that my own carries.

Artemis takes some intense deep breaths trying to compose her breathing enough to form a sentence

"*They knew . They knew all the time all our lives that they might not get to see us grow up they knew we would be left here alone* " A flash of betray crosses her face she was mad at them.

"Arti what are you saying I’m sure they didn’t want to leave "

"*Sel I’m sure they didn’t want to leave to, but they did they left us* "
She takes a sharp intake of breath .

"*They left me . 25 years old with 2 younger sisters and a huge secret that crushed me for most of my life. They left me alone to try to make things normal for you to see you both go to school and to college* "

Her sobbing is now uncontrollable we move in close to her enveloping her in a hug soothing her while she lets out the stress of the last few years . I had never given much thought to how it must have been for her to be starting her own life and then take responsibility of 2 others , to find her mate but never really fully be able to give herself over because she was giving so much to us .

Guilt washes over me for all the times I stayed out late or argued with her for no reason and I lean in closer to her to hold her tightly I am about to apologise before Cynthia gets there first .

"I’m sorry for all you have been through , all this time I forgot your life got put on hold so we could live a somewhat normal one we owe you more than you could ever imagine Arti "

We simultaneously lean in and kiss her on each cheek feeling her smile as we do .

"*Neither of you have anything to be sorry for and truthfully I have no reason to be angry at mum and dad, but I have held this for so long so hear they knew I wish they could have told us sooner*"
She pauses and pulls away .

"*Don’t get me wrong though girls if I had to make that choice again, I would make it over and over if it meant we could safe and happy* "

In that moment I realise Artemis is more than my sister she is the person I look up to most she’s strong and brave in every sense of the word in a fight and in life she does what’s best for other people not only did she choose not to live a normal 20 something life she also was willing to die to protect those around her she.
After a few moments of silence, the laughter comes back into out circle we each read our parents letters remaining more about growing up together and terrorizing one another .

We spend 3 or 4 more hours just enjoying each other company eating delicious food we discuss Artemis and Ryan's Luna ceremony and when we will do that Cynthia getting excited at the thought of planning a party .

Arti informs us that Ryan is getting impatient to see her we look up at her bedroom window and we can see him leaning over eyes like a sad puppy focused one her .
We clean up the mess and all head back inside taking the leftover pizza knowing full well that one of the many hungry wolves in this house will finish it off .

I say goodbye to them dropping each of them at their respective doors and then I’m stood between the 2 doors one my own the other Calder's .

Making the choice I turn the doorknob and step inside .