Chapter 13: She Has To Change
-Rogan-
I couldn’t do it …
I wanted to, or … No, I didn’t really want to. I didn’t want to see my own mate in pain, and especially not because of me, but I also had a pack I needed to look after. How could I do both? How could I protect them and protect her? I shouldn’t even want to protect her. I should reject her, and just get on with it.
“Well?” she asked again. “Or are you going to try and reject me again?”
“You want to go insane?”
She shrugged.
“I’m dead anyway,” she said, and her words hit me deeply.
My wolf whimpered inside my head. He couldn’t even think of her dying without it hurting him, and me too. It was just … it was too much. Her death would only cause us more pain.
“So, I think I will take my chances. At least if I am insane, you will never get an answer out of me,” she said.
*She is too smart …*
Yeah, she knew what she was doing, and it was clear she was willing to sacrifice herself for their cause, but that was not surprising. They had all been brainwashed to do that, but I was surprised how much Serena wanted to talk about this. I was surprised she hadn’t just kept quiet. Instead, she talked and talked. Either she was very nervous, and she was talking so much in order to distract herself and confuse me, or she was actually interested.
*That’s why we need to give her a chance! We might just be able to change her. *
I couldn’t be sure though. I couldn’t be sure Serena was really a curious person, or she wasn’t just trying to distract me, but fuck … just thinking her name. Damn, it fit her so well. She had long blond hair and these unbelievably blue eyes, and a body made to be worshipped by us … No! fuck … I couldn’t think thoughts like those. It was too dangerous. I would only end up wanting her more.
“I’m waiting alpha of all alphas,” she said in a taunting way, though I liked hearing her call me that.
It meant she knew my power.
“You could also make it easier for the both of us,” I said. “Just tell me where you are hiding.”
That made her smile a little.
“Yes, because I am that stupid.”
“Why do you want me to hurt you?”
“I don’t,” she said. “But it is not like I would ever expect you to just let me go. As you said, you want an answer so you can “protect” your people. You animals like to stick together. I get that, but I will never accept your ways.”
“Our ways?” I asked.
“Killing the innocent.”
I sighed, shaking my head.
“Serena,” I said, and she looked almost a little shocked, as I said her name. It so easily moved over my lips though, and I wished I didn’t have to say it in here and where I was about to extract information from her. No, I wanted to say it while we were lying in bed, hopefully naked and both completely spent from hours of mating, but we were enemies, and I could never love a killer like her. “I protect the innocent. I protect my people who are the innocent. I don’t kill humans. Only if they come for me or my people, do I kill them, but it is my job as alpha to protect them.”
She just laughed a little and shook her head, and I knew she wouldn’t believe me.
“Right,” she just laughed. “And I am not tied to a chair right now.”
“You don’t have to be,” I said.
She turned quiet and looked at me confused.
“Just tell me where you are hiding.”
She narrowed her eyes.
“No.”
“Serena, this war might just end both sides. As I said in war there are no winners,” I said.
“There will be,” she said. “We will save everyone.”
“You are killing children and women. How are you saving anyone?”
“All animals or they will grow up to be!” she snarled.
I shook my head, disappointed, but I couldn’t just expect her to believe me right away. She had been a part of the hunters’ society since she was a kid, trained to be the killer she is today. It was probably her parents who put her gun in her hands the first time or brought her out to kill one of us.
“They are just kids,” I said.
She didn’t seem to change her mind though, just because I pointed out how young they were.
“You really think we are the evil ones.”
“Yes,” she said calmly.
I stood up again, placing the chair a little further away, then I turned around and walked out of there. I needed a moment to just get my head back in the game.
*This isn’t working, Rogan.*
“That is what I have been trying to tell you!” I growled lowly, as I rested my back against the wall beside the door.
*No, I mean this torture. We can’t do it.*
“Then I must do it this time. I must reject her.”
*You really think you can?*
No, I wasn’t at all sure I could. It had felt so unsatisfying hearing how much she wanted me to. It had practically been an insult to me. Not being desired by your own mate, even if she was the enemy, certainly stung.
“I don’t know what else to do,” I said.
*Give her a chance.*
“I can’t …”
*Show her our world. This one isn’t a believer. She doesn’t trust blindly. She needs to see it.*
“See we aren’t the evil ones?”
*Yes.*
“She is deep into this brainwashing. It might not change her mind.”
*Do we got another choice?*
“I can’t have her. She and I will still be enemies,” I said. “And I have promised myself to another.”
*Start by showing her who the real enemy is. Then let us take it from there.*
I sighed, not sure if this was a good idea. How could I explain I was showing this hunter around? Most would just want me to get on with the interrogation, and not spend my time trying to get her onto our side, but just hurting her in there, putting pressure on her knee, it had hurt me so badly. I wasn’t sure I could do other things to her. I didn’t even think I could let someone else do it, without wanting to kill them right after. It might just trigger something else inside of me, and I would try and protect her. I would end up killing one of my own most likely.
*Rogan?*
I didn’t have another choice, did I? Either Serena changed or … there wasn’t another option. She had to change.
“Fine,” I said.
*What?!*
My wolf couldn’t believe what I was saying, and really, I couldn’t either.
“We will try your way.”
*You’re serious?!*
My wolf really seemed to perk up, and I felt him becoming more in sync with me again, and less hostile after I had made this decision.
“I’m serious,” I said.
My wolf started to run around excitedly inside of me.
“But if she doesn’t change you know what will happen,” I said.
My wolf froze, and slowly lowered his head.
*She dies.*
That she did. She couldn’t be allowed to live. We couldn’t risk it … So, Serena had better change, because otherwise there was a good chance I would die with her, and I couldn’t die. My time here wasn’t over, and I had things to do.
“This better not blow up in our face,” I whispered, as I pushed away from the door and went to look for some clothes.