Chapter 19
**Megan**
I looked at Melanie waiting for her to start to explain to me why she had decided to block me on IM.
“When I was at the hospital to visit you, you said something, do you remember?” she asks.
“I don’t think so, I was on that many painkillers,” I mumble.
“Well you said how he would use me against you and threaten to do things to me if you didn’t you know,” I nod and I suddenly saw where this was going when I saw her eyes slowly start to well. I sigh and hug her, she slowly hugs me back. “I’m sorry,” she cries.
“Why are you saying sorry? It’s not your fault and well he would have forced me anyway so it doesn’t really matter,”
“But,”
“Really Melanie you’re really going to cry over this?” I ask, pulling away from her and looking at her. She sighs and looks down at her lap “I don’t blame you so why are you blaming yourself?” I ask.
“I don’t know it just seems that it is sort of my fault,”
“Say it back to yourself Melanie,” I state “doesn’t it sound a little bit dumb?” I ask. She sighs and closes her eyes.
“I guess it does,” she mumbles.
“So are you going to stop crying? It’s sort of making me feel awkward,” she laughed “I haven’t seen you cry since you were about ten, I’m going to find it strange,” I say, sitting back and looking down at my lap.
“So are you going to tell me what it’s like living with Mr Peters?” she asks
“It’s nothing amazing he walks around all day with no top on and he’s so quiet it’s-”
“You said it’s nothing amazing when he walks around topless are you out of your mind woman?” she asks. I sigh and roll my eyes at her, her obsession with him did become a little too girly and creepy sometimes. I’m amazed she hasn’t got some kind of fan club towards him or a shrine. “Don’t roll your eyes at me,” she says, huffing and folding her arms “it isn’t my fault I find him attractive,” she mutters. I smile a little and look down at my lap.
The door slowly opens making me and Melanie look at the person that had decided to interrupt us and stood there in his black attire was her brother Brendan. He smiles and then folds his arms while leaning against her door frame.
“What do you want?” Melanie hisses.
“I came to say hi to Megan,”he states.
“You’ve said it now bye,”
“Shut up you dirty Goth,”
“Say’s the one who looks like he’s off to a funeral,” Melanie comments.
“You’re so childish sometimes,” he huffs and turns his attention to me “how are you?” he asks.
“Been better,” I mumble “but been worse as well,”
“You’re on the mend though right?” he asks.
“Brendan, she doesn’t want to talk about it,” Melanie snaps. He growls and walks up to her dragging her up by her arms “get off me,” she snaps. He ignores her and drags her towards the closet and shoves her in then quickly shuts the door and jams it shut with a chair.
“You’re so fucking moody, I’ll let you out when you decide to be kind for once,”he said and walks over to me. He smiles and I just look away from him. He sits down on her bed in the same spot Melanie previously was and crosses his legs while looking at me.”I got myself kicked out as soon as I heard it on the news,” I look at him “don’t start having ago at me, I just wanted to see you and make sure you were ok, the shits downstairs wouldn’t let me come home so I got myself kicked out and then they wouldn’t let me come and see you,” he explains. I sigh and look down at my feet playing with my converse laces. “You never said anything about it when I left,”
“Yeah I never told anyone for a while,” I say, still staring at my laces.
“I know,”he said and then there was silence between us. All we could hear was Melanie calling her brother all the names under the sun. “That night at my leaving party,”
“Can we not,” I said looking at him “I mean I hadn’t really had the best week that week and well I did have a boyfriend,”
“I know you had a boyfriend but it wasn’t like he was being a boyfriend that night,”
“Plus you’re my best friend's brother,” I say, and then I look back down at my feet as I feel myself slowly start to cry.
“What happened that week?”
“What do you think?” I ask looking at him “it doesn’t take a genius to find out now does it?”
“He should be tortured for what he’s done,”he said and then takes my hand “he’s a sick bastard and I can’t believe Melanie didn’t tell me,”
“I swore her to secrecy and well I wouldn’t have told her if Tyler hadn’t had found out,” I say.
“And this teacher what’s he like?” he asks me while lacing his fingers with mine.
I take my hand out of his and wipe the tears from my cheeks “he’s ok, putting up with my shit for some weird reason when he shouldn’t really,” I pause “I wouldn’t be surprised if he gave up on me soon,” I pause again, “he keeps saying stuff like everything will be ok and that I’m safe now when I really aren’t,”
“Why aren’t you?”
“Because no one seems to realise my father could get out at any time because he is mentally ill, I’m not stupid if he pleads insanity or the judge realises he’s not mentally stable give it six maybe twelve months and he’ll be out and I seem to be the only person that sees that,”
“Yeah and do you really think anyone will let him near you? No they won’t because people care about you Megan,” he states. I slowly shake my head, no one cares, they feel sympathy for me and that’s what he told me all along. I wasn't stupid and I wasn’t going to fall for people's lies.
“Yeah well what if I end up like him?” I ask looking at him “people said that people who have gone through stuff like me end up becoming just as insane as the person that made them insane,” I say. He sighs and gives me that sympathetic look I hate.
“You won’t end up insane,”
“How do you know I’m not already?” I ask “I’m on so many different meds right now no one fully knows, my psychologist yesterday said my morbid thoughts and dreams will turn me insane,” I pause “I don’t sleep Brendan because every time I do I have nightmares, I only sleep fully when I’ve had a lot to drink and even then I’m having a nightmare,” he remains silent and looks down at his feet “yeah you know nothing,” I said and got up off the bed.
“You are going to be ok,”he says, getting up and turning to face him.
“No I’m not Brendan,”
“Yes you are and you’re not going to go insane yeah you’re on meds but they’re to help you with all the shit,”
“Yeah they’re really helping Brendan,” I said and slowly started to lift my sleeves up “helping a lot don’t you think?” I ask, showing him my wrists “I have more too,” I added.
“You don’t want to die though,” I cut in.
“Yes I do, I don't want to be here if it wasn’t for that stupid man downstairs I would have got what I wanted the night I went into hospital,” I say. He frowns “yeah I goaded him made him beat me like he’s never beat me before, all I wanted was him to kill me but he couldn’t do that could he? No he has to put me through more fucking hell,” I said and then hold my head in my hands. “I haven’t wanted to be alive for a long time,” I cry and then I feel his arms go around me. “Get off,” I snap, moving away from him “don’t touch me, please,” I beg and walk out of the room.
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