Chapter 94
**Megan**
He sits down on our bed and pulls me onto his lap. Moving my hands around his neck I lay my head on his shoulder. One hand is on my thigh with his other caressing up and down my back. We stay in a comfortable silence for a few minutes just holding each other. I enjoy being in his arms, having him holding me, making me feel safe it’s one of the most relaxing things for me.
“I thought I had upset you...made you angry,” I break our silence first, he sighs deeply and closes his eyes.
“I am angry, but not at you,” he says after opening his eyes. He looks at me and his blue eyes meet my green eyes. “I’m never angry at you,” he says making me smile a little. “I’m upset for you though,” he says. “To me you have a beautiful body regardless of the scars you made yourself and the scars that...” he trails off and his eyes darken slightly. I move my hand down over his chest and then up to his jaw. “Anyway urm yeah, it just upsets me that you are ashamed of your body when there is no need to be. I guess I just want you to feel right again, I want the Megan that Melanie and Yasmin have told me about, the Megan that has no reason to be afraid of anything,” he pauses “I’m angry at the person who has done this and I’m upset at the fact you feel the way you do,” he explains and rests his forehead against mine.
I move my hands back around his neck and hug him. He nuzzles into my neck and holds me tightly to his body. He pulls back from our hug and looks me in the eyes.
“Tell me how you feel okay,” he says and I nod.
“I’m more comfortable showing you my body,” I say quietly and I don’t miss the small quick smirk on his face.
“I think I’m happy about that,” he says and I smile.
“I’m just not to comfortable with other people,” I pause and take a deep breath. “I don’t really know how to explain it, my fear of showing skin to other people is different to my fear with you,” I say not looking at him.
“Tell me,” he urges. I sigh and look down.
“It’s the reactions mostly, I’m scared that when you see all of my body – as you’ve only seen little bits never it all together – that you’ll be disgusted and just full on repulsed by it,” I say quietly and try my best not to make eye contact with him. He sighs deeply and frowns “With other people it’s similar but I don’t want them to see me as a victim,” I pause “because that is what they’ll do,” I say now looking at him. He holds my hand in his and kisses my shoulder
“Have I ever looked at you like you disgust me?” he asks. I frown and look at him “Every time I’ve seen your scars have I looked at them in disgust? Earlier when we were in the bath did I look at you in that way?” he asks and I look down.
“No,” I say quietly and take his hands in mine.
“Do you know why?” he asks and I shake my head “because to me every part of you is beautiful,” he says and I feel myself blush and slowly shake my head. “I know that’s not what you want to hear because you don’t believe that but to me it’s true,” he kisses my forehead making me smile a little. I move my head back so my lips skim his. He moves his hand up to my neck, stroking my neck with the back of his knuckles he leans in and kisses me. I pull back and press my forehead against his.
“I really don’t know where I would be right now if I didn’t have you,” I say and softly press my lips to his.
He moves his hand to the back of my neck and presses me closer to him. I pull back and move off him and stand between his legs. His hands move down my thighs then up again as he looks at me. I smile a little and lift up the skirt of my dress and move on top of him. Logan leans forward and presses his lips to mine briefly and then strokes his nose along mine.
“We should join the others,” he breathes and moves his hands up to cup my face.
“I don’t really want to,” I say and rest my hands on his wet chest. “I also think you should have thought about the bed before you sat down on it,” I say referring to his wet board shorts.
“You don’t seem to mind,” he says causing me to smile and kiss his jaw line. He nuzzles my neck his lips softly pressed to my skin. “Your hair smells nice,” he says.
“Thank you it’s my boyfriend’s shampoo,” I say and I feel him smile.
“Well your boyfriend must smell amazing,” he says,
“I guess,” I say and he looks at me. I giggle and kiss him softly on the lips. He moves his hand to the nape of my neck, holding me in place.
He deepens the kiss, his tongue dancing with mine. His hands move down my back to my bum. He lifts me and moves more onto the bed with me in his arms. I move onto the bed and pull him on top of me never breaking our kiss. I relax and feel him relax in my arms. He pulls away from the kiss and then rests his head on my chest.
“Did I tell you that My Aunt and Uncle told me that you and I were like friends when we were younger,” he says after a moment of silence. I move up onto my elbows putting all my weight on my forearms.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“Well I used to visit my Aunt and Uncle a lot and well I apparently climbed a tree to get you down from it because you got yourself stuck and you would say hi to me all the time,” he pauses “and you had gotten lost in the park after you chased a cat from the street all the way to the park,” he pauses “I remember that actually but I didn’t know it was you,” he explains.
“I don’t remember,” I say quietly.
“You were only about five years old,” he says and starts to kiss up my neck.
“You were 12?” I ask. He nods nips my neck with his teeth making me gasp. I close my eyes as I feel him kiss under my ear. He moves his hand up my thigh as he kisses my jaw line.
“Is the bikini new?” he asks pulling away and looking at me. I shake my head “Hmm I’ve just never seen it,”
“Well you don’t go through my underwear drawer so you wouldn’t have,” I say and he laughs. He leans down and kisses my chest.
“I like it,” I smile at his comment and lift his chin up to kiss him. He moves the skirt of my dress up to my hips. I untie the knot at my waist.
Then the door opens. Logan pulls back and looks behind him. I tilt my head to look behind Logan to see Yasmin and Carl stood at the door.
“Told you,” Yasmin says.
“What do you want?” Logan snaps.
“You’re uncle is here,” he says.
“Ok get out,” he snaps once more.
“Can I join?” Carl asks innocently , Logan sighs and drops his head in anger.
“No you fucking can’t,” I snap at Carl and his eyes widen. Yasmin laughs and walks off.
“Oh,” Carl says in fake shock “I am outraged by that Language,” he says and moves his head so I can see the side of his face. He lifts his nose in the air “Hmph,” he says “I cannot believe you choose a woman over me, a MAN!” he says towards Logan and shuts our door. I giggle and move my arms around Logan’s neck.
“Thank you,” Logan says and leans in to kiss me. I move my hands down his back. He lifts my dress further up exposing my stomach. He pulls away from our kiss and I feel his lips on my stomach. Logan kisses up my stomach as he lifts my dress over my head.
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