Chapter 65: Moon goddess, please...
~Raphael's POV~
I shouldn't have left her alone. It was a stupid move on my part. It was foolish of me.
Her hands were so cold. Colder than any ice I had dipped my hands into during training.
Moon Goddess, please…
I couldn't even complete the sentence I didn’t know if I had the right to ask anything of her after deliberately ignoring her all these years. I hadn't done that on purpose. I just simply stopped believing after countless failures in finding a mate.
Even the mating ritual of getting a compatibility mate had failed. None of the bond rituals held on my behalf had ever worked.
So, I hated her. Blamed her for giving me a problematic wolf and making me mateless not to add that I was an immortal that had been existing for over a decade. Anyone in my state would have ran mad just like I did.
My fingers traced Ava’s pale, cracked lips. What do I need to do to undo whatever Lara might have done to her? I don't want her to die. I can't live without her. I just can't.
"My king?"
It was Caleb’s voice. When had he come into the room? Had I already lost myself so much that I can't even sense someone entering a room? I sincerely do not want to go back to the life I was living before Ava came into my life. I won't be able to resist the beast allure of destruction.
Most especially tasting Ava's gentleness and the mate’s bond.
I turned to him. He looked haggard and exhausted, probably mirroring my own reflection. His hair was a mess, strands scattered across his face. He looked like one of the living dead clan.
If he looked this bad, then my own reflection must be worse.
"Are the ministers still demanding I reject her as my mate?"
Those baboons were the reason I left Ava’s side that morning. If it weren’t for them, Ava… Ava would be fine. I would have protected her.
"Do not bother with them, my king. I will take care of them. However, there is a new problem."
Caleb's voice was strained, edged with something close to fear.
Was he afraid of me? Did he think I would lose my mind and go on a killing rampage?
I decided to read his mind to spare myself the guessing game.
He looks terrible. Should I say something to him? Has he even eaten? Ahh… why did this have to happen now? I was supposed to be on a romantic trip with Gemma. Curse that witch girl!
That was all he was worried about? Guilt pressed against my chest.
"What’s the issue, Caleb?"
If I couldn’t send him on his trip with his mate, the least I could do was ease his burden. That was the bare minimum I owed him as his king.
My hand remained clamped tightly around Ava’s, hoping to transfer some of my warmth to her ever ice-cold skin. I had even been infusing mana magic to keep her warm, but no matter what I did, the warmth only lasted a few minutes before the cold returned.
The physicians and magicians were unable to remove the curse placed on her.
I had even summoned mages, including Minister Wan, despite my case against him, desperately hoping they could undo the curse. Yet, none of them could do a damn thing.
I never knew dark spells like the one Lara used still existed. I thought I had wiped them out three hundred years ago, after the destruction they had caused.
"My king, did you hear me?"
Caleb looked at me blankly.
No. I hadn’t heard a single word. I had been too lost in my thoughts.
What do I say now? This was embarrassing.
I skimmed his mind, hoping to catch a hint of what he had said.
I’m so scared. What if he loses control again? He wasn’t even listening to me. If anything happens to her, the entire witch clan will be wiped out. But even that won’t be enough to appease the beast inside him…
He sighed heavily, then closed his thoughts with; Why does evil always seem to find me?
"Caleb?"
"Hmm?"
He responded absentmindedly.
Caleb never addressed me so informally, no matter how close we were. Even though he was my friend, he was still afraid of me.
No, not of me. Of the beast inside me.
They always feared the beast, never its vessel.
Grey hadn't spoken to me since Ava’s incident. It was as if he had severed our bond entirely. I could feel the connection between us slowly breaking. If Ava don’t survive, there would be no stopping Grey from his bloodlust.
"What were you saying earlier?"
He shook his head as if trying to push away a troubling thought.
"Ahh… nothing much, my king."
He wasn’t looking at me. Something was wrong.
Imagine telling him to leave his mate’s side to meet with the Netherland kings. What if something happens to her while he’s away? No! He mustn’t find out about this invitation.
Netherlands? Why would they invite me?
The Netherlands was the only kingdom still standing that I hadn’t conquered. Quite unfortunate.
I still didn’t understand how they managed to survive after two hundred years of war, destruction, and death.
It had only been recently that I left them alone. That's if a hundred years ago is recent. Time is quite slow with people in Lystra.
Still, I couldn't shake the feeling that Neatherlandals were responsible for Theresa’s death.
And if truly they were responsible, I would wipe them out.
Bloodlust stirred within me, that ever-lingering thirst that was never truly satisfied. The thought of war excited me.
"My king, I will take my leave. Just concentrate on your mate. I will handle the ministers."
Although, there’s only so much I can do.
That was his last thought before he left the room. So, the ministers were still causing trouble.
If I remained here, it wouldn’t solve anything. Nor would it help Ava.
The best thing to do was to face the enemy head-on.
"You will dare?" Grey roared inside me.
Grey, staying here won’t help her. You know that, right?
"You are the reason she’s like this in the first place! You don’t deserve her!"
His relentless growls and howls of anger sent a splitting headache tearing through my skull.
This was the first time in over two weeks that Grey had made himself known. He was struggling against me, fighting for control.
He didn’t want me to leave Ava.
I don’t want to leave her either! My anger boiled over.
I am king, Grey. I cannot abandon my people for long. I spoke softer this time, a deep sadness creeping into my chest.
"You mean the same people who refuse to accept our mate as their queen?"
Grey snarled, slamming against the walls, human and beast separating us.
If those walls collapsed, it would be over.
Grey would kill every last minister, starting with Minister Wan, the main advocate of me rejecting Ava.
We can’t keep killing, Grey.
I exhaled sharply, exhausted.The only person who could ease my heart was hanging on the edge of death.
"All I know is, you will not leave this room."
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