Let's See
I was lost in my own world, chasing that forbidden pleasure, drowning in thoughts I shouldn’t be having. My body was warm, pulsing with sensations that weren’t supposed to exist at that moment, in that house.
Then..... footsteps. Coming up the stairs.
I froze.
“Bella? Cesar? Where is everybody?”
My heart stopped. That voice, my mother-in-law.
Panic surged through me like ice water. If someone found me here... like this... God, this would be worse than humiliation. Worse than embarrassment. This would be the end of everything.
I yanked my hands away from my body, off my breasts, off my aching core, trying to fix my clothes, to put myself back together. My breath was shaky, and ragged as I listened, praying that she wouldn’t find me, wouldn’t see me like this. That we wouldn’t meet eye to eye.
Just when I thought she might take that final step, that our eyes would lock and she’d know Everything, suddenly another voice cut through the air from downstairs.
“Mrs. Cincinnati?”
“Yes, darling?” my mother-in-law replied. “Oh, you have my little boy. Where’s Bella?”
“She’s upstairs,” the voice said. It must have been the maid.
Relief flooded me as I heard my mother-in-law’s heels clicking down the staircase again.
I let out a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding. Thank God. Now was my chance.
I tiptoed away from the door, making sure no one saw me. Thank God Bella and Cyrus were still… busy banging. They hadn’t noticed I was outside. Hadn’t heard me. This was perfect, my escape window.
I just had to get the hell out of here before anyone saw me. My thoughts were racing. My face was flushed. I shook my head, trying to erase everything from my mind, but it wasn’t working. That moment. That sound. That sight. I couldn’t stop thinking about what had just happened.
I paused and strained my ears. I could hear voices in the kitchen, my mother-in-law and the maid. Good. They were distracted. Without wasting another second, I tiptoed through the hallway, rushed down the stairs as quietly as I could, and bolted straight for the door.
I nearly ran out of Bella and Cyrus’s house.
I could have rejoiced in the fact that no one had caught me. That no one had seen me, stopped me, or even suspected a thing. I could have breathed easily. But I didn’t.
The moment I stepped into my bedroom, I went straight to the bathroom. I tore my clothes off as if they were burning me, threw them on the floor, and blasted the shower cold, ice cold. I stepped into it, letting the water hit me like punishment.
I stood there, hoping, praying that the freezing water would wash it all away. The thoughts, the images, the sounds, the feelings. What I did.
I couldn’t believe it. I was the worst person. I kept repeating it in my head like a curse. Who does that? Who even does that?
I did. I did that.
This was worse than anything I could have imagined myself doing. Worse than betrayal. Worse than weakness. I stayed in that shower for far too long. Until I was shaking. Until my skin was numb and my teeth were chattering uncontrollably.
When I finally turned off the water, I grabbed a towel, dried off without even looking in the mirror, and stumbled back to the bed. I sat there frozen.
I kept replaying it over and over in my head. Different scenarios of how it could have gone. What if Bella had opened the door? What if Cyrus had? Or worse… what if my mother-in-law had seen me? What if the maid had heard?
The shame gripped me so tightly I could barely breathe. Is this who I am now? Is this who I’ve become?
But then, after sitting in silence, staring at the wall for what felt like forever, another thought crept in.
I deserved that. I deserved to feel that wanted too.NI deserved to experience that mind-numbing pleasure. To be touched. To be desired. To feel alive.
To be loved. To give love, too.
But then reality came crashing in again, hard.
That’s not me. That’s not my story. That’s not my fate.
Because my reality is to die… Cullen's virgin wife.
The last thing I wanted today was to see my mother-in-law, Bella, or anyone else from that house. I couldn’t face them not after what happened happened.
So I got dressed quickly, told the maid to call the driver, and slipped out before anyone could stop me. I knew my new bodyguard would get an alert and probably stalk me around town, but I didn’t care.
I went around the city for hours, trying to lose myself. I did a little shopping and wandered in and out of stores until one caught my eye. A lingerie boutique.
Something inside me shifted. I walked in.
Maybe it was time to take back a little control. Maybe I could do something. Anything. I had never really tried before, not with Cullen. But maybe now I would.
Even if he didn’t love me. Even if he never would. Maybe… maybe I could seduce him. If I couldn’t have his heart, maybe I could at least take his body.
Maybe I finally could get something out of this marriage.
I picked out a red lace set the bold, daring, unapologetically sexy. The kind of lingerie that screamed confidence, desire, and power. I bought it without overthinking. And when I left the boutique, I felt lighter. Not better, but a little stronger.
After shopping, I went to a quiet restaurant, had lunch, and stayed out as long as I could. I didn’t want to go home too early and risk having dinner with my mother-in-law. She always asked questions I didn’t want to answer. Always looked at me with that too-kind smile that felt like a lie.
By the time I returned home, it was just past seven. I handed my shopping bags to the maid and told her I’d already had dinner, hoping it would buy me the solitude I needed.
I went upstairs and ran a hot bubble bath. I lit candles around the bathroom, turned off the lights, and let myself soak.
When I got out, I put on the red lingerie. It hugged my body in all the right ways. I slid on a silky bathrobe over it, then slipped into a pair of red stiletto heels that matched perfectly.
Standing in front of the mirror, I took a breath. My makeup was flawless. My skin glowed. My eyes held fire. My body was magic..!
I looked sexy. I looked amazing. Let’s see if Cullen can pass this up.
Bella told me today, that even though Cullen was supposedly in love with her, he still slept with other women. That meant one thing, he didn’t have to love someone to sleep with them.
And if that’s all I could get… Then tonight, I’d take it.
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