Chapter Twenty three
What is happening? I can’t marry Cyrus, not after Cullen and me. I slept with his younger brother a few days ago at his house and in his bedroom, that’s probably where we are going to live after we are married. This is wrong in so many levels, in so many countries, in so many traditions and morals. I can’t sleep with someone and his brother, my conscious won’t let me and if anyone ever found out in the family which they eventually will, I’ll be toast. Not even my father will be able to save me from my fate. Where is Cullen?
In another circumstance, just a few days ago this would be the happiest moment of my life. To have Cyrus, the man I have obsessed and crushed over for all of my life to ask me to marry him, but that night changed everything and it changed us. I want to say yes more than anything else in the world, I should be jumping up and down with joy right now, but I am filled with dread and fear. It’s crazy that I have fantasized of this moment in a dozen, probably hundreds ways but I never imagined this, not even close.
“Bella honey” my mom calls and takes me from the space of my own head to the present
Every one’s eyes are trained on me as I stand there like a deer caught on headlights. Cyrus isn’t on a knee anymore, he is sitting down on the floor by my seat watching me from beneath I can’t look at him with that shining ring lighting my eyes
“Oh! Sorry, I am still in shock….and surprised, obviously” I laugh and it sounds awkward even to my own ears.
There are frowns and concerns from most people in the room and I feel like they think I might actually be really crazy after all. I gather myself together
“Where is Cullen, he should have been here?”
“I already told you he is in Italy. Are you sure you’re feeling okay baby?” Mrs. Cedric asks. Well, if she is concerned I must look crazy
“I was just wondering about the engagement party. I thought, I could have the ring at the ceremony that looks more proper”
“There won’t be an engagement party. This is your engagement day, from here on out we will be discussing the wedding” Mr. Cedric answers
“The wedding?...I mean the wedding of course”
“Sweetie, are you going to answer the poor boy? He looks lost down there. Everyone here knows you have been in love with him ever since you were a little girl. Stop giving him such a hard time with that yes”
Thanks for the embarrassment mom. It’s clear that everyone is expecting a yes from me with all the encouraging smiles they have and by Cyrus father’s words, they probably already finalized everything and are only giving me a show of power. Making me think I have a say in this or what happens in my life. I don’t.
“Yes” my mouth says
“Fucking finally” Cyrus says as he stands to his full weight taking my left hand and placing the ring on my finger
“Language!” both his parents shout at the same time.
When the ring has set on my finger Cyrus inspects it while caressing my hand as he does and then kisses it and pulls me towards him. I have no option than hugging him back awkwardly, I hate that my feelings for Cyrus are still alive and well inside me.
From there on is a celebration, dad opens champagne and we all take a glass and cheer together. I am plastering on a fake smile but our parents seem to really be into it, I think I even saw Mr. Cedric laughing at one point. Later, our fathers move to my dad’s office to talk business and our mothers retire to the family room to start discussing the wedding. We are supposedly left alone together to talk and get to know each other as fiancées and future spouses.
“Bella fucking princess. Did you really have to make me kneel down there for so long?” Cyrus asks as soon as we are all alone. That’s the first thing he says to me.
“You weren’t kneeling, you were sitting. There is a difference”
“Were you trying to make a fool of me or what?”
“You’re paranoid. Where’s Cullen?”
“Would you stop that?”
“What?”
“Stop asking for my young brother every five minutes, my god! It’s embarrassing”
“I am sorry if asking for my best friend in the most important day of my life that would change us forever is upsetting for you”
“You should be jumping with joy and kissing my feet right now but yet you have a reaction to this that I wasn’t expecting. Did you really try to kill yourself? Did almost dying change your perspective in life?” I can’t believe he went there. I know he isn’t sensitive but no one other than my therapist talks about my attempt straight to my face.
Regarding the circumstances, it’s horrific to hear this coming from him. I stand and as politely as I can, say to him
“I would like to go to my room now. I am tired and you’re not great company right now”
“Would you like me to escort you to your room, my fiancée?”
“It’s just upstairs, in the same house we are. I think I’ll be fine”
“I insist” Cyrus answers as he takes my hand and leads the way upstairs to my room.
When we reach my bedroom he pulls me into the opposite door of my bedroom and shuts the door behind me, pushing my back against it.
“This is not my bedroom” I tell him
“I might have not been here in a while but I know where your bedroom is little princess. I heard you have got surveillance in there, I wouldn’t want them to see this” he says as he gives me that sarcastic smile again.
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