I want a wolf

I needed some fresh air, I walked out of the house. It was a beautiful day! I was looking for Joshua, but Bonnie said he was out with Jaggar. The thought alone made me feel sad. Joshua’s wolf is amazing. Jaggar is also a big one. One of the biggest wolves I’ve ever seen. His fur is golden brown, almost the same colour as Joshua’s hair. I bet Joshua is gonna be the leadwarrior some day. Especially because he’s a Beta, hopefully my Beta once.

Joshua tries to minimize talking about Jaggar. I know he’s scared of hurting me. He knows I’m dying to meet mine some day. But at the same time, I wanted to know everything about feeling and interacting with your inner self. We learn about it at school, but it’s not the same as experiencing it. They said that your wolf is an mirror of your true self, your inner soul. But with no filter. Beasts doesn’t know how to lie. Your wolf will always love you and be fair to you. Joshua told me that it’s nice to always have someone to talk to. Someone who knows exactly how you feel.

Speaking about the devil. I see a golden wolf running towards me. “Hey Golden Retriever,” I tease Jaggar. I hear a growl leaving his mouth, I know he hates it when I call him that. But he loves me the same time, Jaggar being part of Joshua makes him automatically family to me.

*Don’t you dare calling me a dog, midget.*

*Hahaha, I thought you liked it - being the big golden retriever? Taken care of everyone?*

I mindlinked Jaggar back. We don’t often speak to the other’s wolf directly. The human side and wolf side share the same thoughts, but it’s easier for a human to think and analyze. The wolf is better following instincts. So when it comes to follow instinct or nature, wolf will automatically take over but the wolf let the human do the thinking in 90 percent of the time. But because Joshua is in wolf form right now, Jaggar is dominating if he wants to. And apparently he wants that now. I smile. Jaggar can handle it, like Joshua. They’re both the funny guys, always making people laugh and into a joke.

*Jaggar, can you shift for me please? I want to talk to Joshua.*

*Sure do. Are you gonna stop watching or do you want to look at my big dick? If not, I recommend to turn around.*

Oh dear Goddess, sometimes I forget Jaggar is the big-mouthed one. I turn around and hear bones cracking. I wait 30 seconds and turn around. Joshua is now in his jogging pants and asks me: “What’s up bud? I heard you wanted to talk to me?”. “Yes,” I answer “tell me everything about the phase before your connection with Jaggar. How did that feel?”
Joshua is thinking. “Hmmm.. You sure, you wanna know? I hope you soon find out yourself..”

I got frustrated, why does nobody wants to talk to me? Why need I to wait, every single fucking time? I feel my anger grow. “If you don’t talk with me, right now, I will kick your fucking ass Joshua!” and a growl left my mouth. I didn’t notice. While I’m waiting for an answer, I see Joshua staring at me, his eyes wide open; slowly walking backwards. “What the fuck Adam! You’re creeping the shit out of me! Did you just growl at me? And what’s wrong with that glow around you? I know you’re an Alpha, man, but seriously. Your aura is high level shit! My wolf goes nuts, he wants to run!”

I’m surprised. I laugh at Joshua, sheepishly, brushing my hand through my hair.. “Sorry, Josh. It wasn’t my intention to. Did I growl? I never noticed. I don’t know what’s happening with me. I’m a bit scared too. Last week I growled for the first time, remember? When I was with mom. After you left her office. I was freaking angry at her. My aura even got bigger than it was now, my mother had to bow for me. Every single day after that, I feel my power grow. That’s why I wanted you to tell me about your days before Jaggar came to the surface. Maybe it’s my wolf, maybe he reaches the surface soon.”

“Your MOTHER bowed her head for YOU?” I see Joshua is completely out of his mind. “I know, man. That was our reaction too. She thinks I’m gonna be powerful. But we don’t know why I can growl and at the same time my wolf isn’t on the surface yet.” I react to his question. “So tell me, how was it, the days before you felt Jaggar?”