Chapter 19

I stopped talking, and he didn't drive too fast either. Everything is quiet, and he respects my need for silence by not bothering me or speaking to me.
I'm freezing now because his car has air conditioning, but I'm not complaining to him. I can still stand the cold; I don't want to ask him for a favor. I did not ask him for it. I didn't ask him to drive me home; he just did it, and I won't thank him for it.
My head is literally hurting, and I'd like to sleep. I need to get some rest because I still have school later, and if I used to be so excited for night class, now I'm not sure how I should feel anymore. I know Jas wouldn't want to meet me yet because the situation was so new. I'm not going to force him to see me, and I'm not going to see him even if I really want to. I'll accept his decision to avoid me at first because I'm sure he'll return.
"You may take a nap; I'll wake you up when we get at your place," Ivan stated, looking in the rearview mirror at me.
"I don't trust you; perhaps you'll take me somewhere else," I said, embracing myself since I was cold.
"I'm sorry for not turning off the air conditioner," he said in the rearview mirror. "Why don't you say you're getting cold? You're just putting up with everything. I'm here to listen."
I'm not sure why, but as he said those words, I had the impression he was trying to say something else. I'm looking for someone to talk to, but he's not the right guy for the job. Even if I wanted to speak with someone, I had no idea who it was. Apart from Jas, Aly is my sole friend, but I don't want to bother her. I'll be on my own as long as I can be on my own.
Ivan turned off the air conditioner, but the chill in my body persisted. I felt like I was about to pass out from the cold.
We were close to my house seeing as I knew what we were going through, but I can"t help not to tremble. I lifted my legs in the seat, and I hugged my own knee. Because I was getting a headache, I knelt down and closed my eyes.
Ivan asked, anxious, "Hey, are you okay?" I didn't respond since I knew he could sense I wasn't feeling well. "You're getting cold; why did you walk in the rain? Where's the umbrella I provided you? Why didn't you use it?" he followed up with a series of questions.
I never responded to him. I don't have the energy to speak, and I desperately want to sleep. I was cold, but the heat in my eyes was palpable.
I noticed him driving faster, and we arrived at my apartment quickly. He rushed out and opened the passenger door where I was seated.
"What happened? You're pale!" he exclaimed, his brow furrowed in worry.
I tried to get out of the car by stepping on the floor with my foot, but my strength was insufficient. I fell on his body because my knees were cold and I couldn't stand up properly. He has me caught in his grasp, and I don't have the strength to push him away.
With his right hand, he is embracing my waist and placing his left palm on my forehead to check me. "You have a fever. This is what the stubborn get," he added and I was taken aback when he lifted me to my apartment.
I don't have the strength to stop him, and I don't want to further hurt myself. I'm already battling too much and need anyone's help, so if he's the one who's willing to help, I won't protest, even if I'm annoyed with him. I'll simply assume that this is his way of making up for all he did to me the other day.
He asked, "The door is locked; where is the key?"
"I-in m-my b-bag," I stuttered back.
He gently placed me on the floor, and my apartment's wall supported me. He fished in my handbag for the key and opened the door as soon as he found it.
"Where is your room? Is this it?" he questioned as he picked me up again.
He entered my room after I nodded. He carefully placed me on my bed before turning on the ceiling light switch, which I had not turned on since moving into the apartment.
"You have to take a bath because you're saturated from the rain," he remarked.
I'd like to tell him that I'm unable to move. I'm exhausted and want to sleep. I am not going to die. When I wake up and have had enough rest, I'll take a bath.
"If you can't take a bath, just change your clothes. Is it okay with you for me to find your clothes?" he asked and I nodded.
If I don't get dressed, I won't lose my cold. I could force myself to get dressed but I couldn"t take a bath.I heard her steps and opening my cabinet. I can't see him since my lid is too heavy to look at him, but I can feel and hear him. As he closed my cabinet and returned to me, I heard him.
"Get dressed. I'll be back in 10 minutes," he said, placing my clothes on the bed. "I'm sure you're done getting dressed."
I nodded once again, and he assisted me in sitting up. I leaned against the bed's headboard to keep from falling over.
He said, "I'm going out. I'm going to purchase your medicine as well," and I heard his footsteps approaching the doorway.
When I heard the door close, I started dressing. I have no rights to feel awkward because of him preparing my clothes. I'm in desperate need of help right now, and I owe him gratitude I had previously mistakenly believed that I should not be grateful to him. I'm not sure where I would have ended up if it hadn't been for him.
I dumped my old clothing in the garbage bin of my study table when I got dressed. I could easily put it on because it was on the side of my bed. Another thing is that I just throw paper there so it doesn't become dirty or stink. I'll just fix everything once I'm feeling better.
My bed sheet was a little damp, but I didn't have the strength to change it. I couldn't even open the blanket, so I didn't bother; that's fine with me, and at least the cold is lessening. I rapidly fell asleep and was completely unconscious of what was going on around me.
Ivan's pov
Before I left to go buy medicine, I locked the main door. I couldn't help but be concerned because her fever was so high. It was what was bothering her? Why was she wandering down the side of the highway before, ignoring the rain? What if I hadn't seen her at all? She is not in the right frame of mind and she could be in danger. And I'm furious at the person she was with before.
It saw it! I noticed this in her Facebook stories. I saw that someone was with her, and I'm interested as to where that person went. Why did he or she leave El? If I only knew that she is with a man and let her go like that, I would hit that man.
I feel like something went wrong even El didn't even tell me she had a problem. And, if my suspicions are accurate, she has a problem due of that man, I would look for that man to be thrashed till he passed out.
He has no privilege to hurt El. I knew she was kind even though I didn't know her well. Among the women I've met, she's remarkable, stunning, and one-of-a-kind. I haven't had a relationship because I don't see anything exceptional in girl, yet when our paths cross, she captures my attention right away.
I go through the mechanics of teasing her to get her attention. She didn't care if I was the dean's son or an outstanding student, and I was well-known at school, so I devised a strategy to get her attention. I yearn for her attention and for her to allow me to like and get to know her, but she is impossible to reach. She had to be at the top of her form to notice me. Many girls like me, but the person I prefer is uninterested in me.
If she wants something else, I will accept. Because that is the world's reality, I am powerless to do anything. I can't buy the affection of the person I desire, no matter how much money I have. However, I will not allow her to adore someone who only hurts her.
She doesn't deserve to be wounded; she deserves to be loved and appreciated. I'm longing for her attention, love, and care and then the man she wants will just hurt her? That can't be right; I'm not accepting it.
I returned to her apartment as soon as I finished buying the medicine. She's tough, bold, and self-sufficient. She was the only one in the apartment and I was thankful that I had seen her earlier. I'm so thankful that I was given the opportunity to help her, and to take care of her. I knew she needed help and I was willing to give it to her.
When I got to her apartment, I peeked at her in her room. She had changed his clothes and was asleep. Her blanket was not in order, so I arranged it to cover her whole body. I also check if her temperature but there is no change in how hot he was before.I
went back to the kitchen and prepared lukewarm water. I took it to her room and then I looked for a face towel in her drawer. I sat on the side of her bed and began wiping her arm, neck, and face as soon as I got a face cloth.
At the same moment, I'm happy and sad. I'm overjoyed because I've been given the opportunity to look after her. I'm saddened by her state; she's unwell and plainly has problems.
I couldn't take my gaze away from her. She was stunning, especially now that I'm looking at her so attentively. Her brows and eyelashes were dark and thick, her nose was little and pointed, and her lips were thin and pinkish, matching the form of her round face well.
"Do you like someone right now? Did he hurt you? You'll tell me who the man who hurt you is when you're okay, and I'll take vengeance for hurting you," I said, as if she wasn't sleeping.
While she was sleeping, I grabbed my phone out of the pocket of my shorts and took a picture of her. I knew she'd be upset because of what I'd done, but I wouldn't tell her. She won't take my phone, so she won't be able to view it. I simply want it to be my wallpaper because it inspires me every day.
I checked her Facebook, but there isn't a single photo of her. I can only see her photos on her stories because her account is private and limited.
I'm hoping she'll accept my friend request if she gets well. Despite the fact that we had a conversation, she declined my friend request the last time I sent it. I'm not sure why, but I was ecstatic when he replied that day. And, because I was having so much fun, I announced on social media that my crush and I had previously talked. Many people questioned who she was after reading my post, but I did not reply. Unless El agrees to introduce her as my crush to everyone, they won't know who I'm referring about. Maybe when the time comes that she agrees to let me introduce her to my world, I will be the happiest man in the world.
"Just love me, El. It's not hard to love me. I'm fine even if you just learned to love me. I won't leave you and hurt you. I'm serious with you and I just loved you now. It"s not just like an infatuation. I am aware of what I am feeling and I know that I am falling for you."I took her hair which had fallen on her face and hung it behind her ear.
"You're stunning, El, and the man you love is extremely fortunate, and I sincerely hope I'm that man."
I still don"t feel her appreciation for me but she has already captured my heart. I also don"t know why I fell for her right away. I'm delighted every time she gets irritated with me because it means she's paying attention to me. I lose my exhaustion every time I hear her speak, and I know what I feel for her isn't just admiration. I can only be sure once, and I am certain of my feelings for her.