A confidant

Lilian's POV

Yuria reached out her hand and placed a comforting hand on my arm and patted it.



"Because you care about him, Lilian." She said and I sighed. I wasn't so sure... Was that the reason?


"And also because you see something in him that is worth fighting for." She went on.


"But still, that doesn’t mean you have to put up with any and everything that he throws your way. You deserve better than to be treated like an afterthought." She said.



Strangely, I found it endearing that she didn't address me with honorifics. Rather she called me by my name without having to call me my lady or the likes of it. That was refreshing. It was more friendly, it made me feel closer to her.



Notwithstanding, her words struck a chord within me, it resonated very well with the thoughts that had been circling in my mind for days.



"You’re right," I murmured and looked down at my hands. "I do care about him, but… it’s getting harder and harder, even more difficult to keep fighting for someone who doesn’t seem to want to fight for me." I decided.




Yuria squeezed my arm gently, I saw her lips part into a wane smile as she regarded me.



"Maybe it’s time to focus on yourself for a while." Shebsuggested and I nodded my head. " Give him the space he so desperately needs, and take that time to figure out what you truly need, too. You shouldn’t have to be subjected to having to sacrifice your own happiness for someone else’s." She told me and I nodded my head. I appreciated her advice.




"You’re right," I repeated, this time with more conviction. "I need to stop letting him dictate my feelings and emotions. I’ve been so wrapped up in trying to make things work with him that I’ve forgotten about myself." I said. I sighed sadly.



Yuria smiled at me, her eyes were warm and filled with encouragement.



"Exactly my point. Take a step back, Lilian. Focus on what makes you happy, on what you need." She said. "Alpha Kaiden will either come around or he won’t, but either way, you’ll be stronger for it." She said. I nodded my head at that. Those were the exact words I needed at the moment. I needed words of encouragement that would boost my ego.





"Thank you Yuria." I said to her. I didn't even know what I would have done if I hadn't met you. I would probably have died of boredom and loneliness. Or maybe from neglect.



"It's nothing." She smiled.
"Really," I said and then a thought came to my mind. "I should introduce you to Kaiden. " I said thinking out loud. That seemed to get her surprised.



"Ah," she laughed. "That is so unnecessary." She said with a chuckle.
"Nonsense." I said. "I should let him know that I have found a friend in the blue moon pack, who would have thought?" I said and she smiled without another word.



As we both sat there, I felt some sort of weight lift from off my shoulders. I felt relieved to say the least.



Talking to Yuria had given me a new perspective of some sort, a perspective that I desperately needed. I hadn’t realized until then how much I had been drowning in my own thoughts until I had the chance to voice them out loud to a friend. And oh the little relief that followed. And even though I was still unsure about what the future held with Kaiden, I just knew that it was about time I decided to take control of my own happiness.




"Thank you, Yuria," I said again, this time more sincerely as my eyes met her gaze. "I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear that." I said smiling.


Yuria’s smile widened, and she leaned in closer to me.

"That’s what friends are for, right? To remind each other of their worth and to help them see the bigger picture. And we are friends are we not?" she asked me. That was a silly question. Of course we were.



"And trust me, Lilian, you’re worth so much more than what you’ve been putting yourself through." She said to me.



I smiled back at her, I could feel the sweet and peaceful feeling a warmth spread through my chest. It was strange, but in that moment, I felt closer to Yuria than I had to anyone else in a long time.


She was just that friend I was looking for. One that I needed desperately even though I didn't realize it until then. She had a way of making me feel seen, understood, without even trying. Good thing she was a female, otherwise…


It was quite refreshing, and I found myself grateful to have her around.


"Do you want to stay here a bit longer?" Yuria asked me, her tone was light as she spoke. "Or should we head back and join the festivities? I’m sure they’ll be wondering where you’ve disappeared to." She reasoned.



She was right. I was the Luna and my presence was needed at the feast. Kaiden was probably searching for me. Or not…


I considered her question and I glanced back towards the packhouse where the feast was probably already in full swing.


The thought of facing Kaiden still made my heart race and thump uneasily with anxiety, but Yuria’s was right. I needed to be there.



"Let’s stay here for a while," I decided. "I’m not ready to face everything just yet. Plus, it’s nice here. Quiet, peaceful. It gives me time to think." I said.



Yuria nodded her head in agreement.
"Sounds perfect to me." She said and then let out a sigh and we both fell silent for a short while.



And so we stayed there, the two of us sat together in the noisy silence of the woods.




For the first time in days, I felt a peace and calmness in my body. Maybe things weren’t exactly perfect with Kaiden, and maybe they never would be.


But for now at the very least, I had found a somewhat friend in Yuria, someone who understood me without needing to go through a series of explanations.
And that, in itself, was something to hold on to.