236
Matt
Eliza's tears spilled over, and she turned away. I walked around her. My nose twitched at the sterile scent filling the hallways. She let out a frustrated sound and darted back into my path. Her eyes filled with a mix of desperation and guilt.
"What now?"
"You look sick, Matt," Eliza said, her voice quivering. "Don't you understand that you might be upset, but you're suffering by being away from the pack for so long?"
I almost laughed. Maybe I did. She looked shocked and appalled. There was a bitter irony in her words. Eliza, who had never shown genuine care for me, was suddenly concerned about my well-being? She was more desperate than I thought. I wondered what Tony told her when she accosted him outside his new place of work.
"It's not funny. You're so thin, and--"
"Don't play games, Eliza. We both know you couldn't give a damn about me, and you're one to talk. You've lost more weight than I have." I smirked. "Doesn't seem like being with the pack would do much more than kill me."
I pushed down the shock of terror at how true those words rang in me.
"That's not true! I raised--"
"You?" I asked, feeling my powers simmering.
She gasped and flinched back. Eliza's expression shifted between frustration and vulnerability. She knew I was the last person she could pull that shit with. Nanny, sure, but she was hardly ever around me. Tony was her favorite, and it wasn't that I cared, exactly, but I wasn't going to play along with this image she was probably still using to keep her place with Oren. I remember those hissed words she didn't think anyone had heard.
"I'm just the spare, right?"
Her eyes widened in horror. "Matt, I--"
"You shouldn't be wasting your time with me when Tony was the eldest, hm?"
"Matt, I... I just want what's best for you and Tony," she said. "I don't know why your mother would have--"
I snarked at her. "Don't you dare pin this on my mother, you vicious bitch."
"You--"
"My mother loved me more than anything. More than you could ever imagine, more than you could dream. You don't even have the right to think about her."
She set her jaw. I could hear her grinding her teeth, but there was no denial in her eyes, and I saw a bit of hope die in her eyes. She could see it in my face that I remembered more than enough that I wouldn't give a damn what she said.
"...The pack needs you both. Alpha needs you."
I scoffed. "Honestly, Eliza, I might have felt bad for you if you had just come clean and asked for help, but this is ridiculous."
"I--"
"Cut the shit," I said. "You're not here on Oren's behalf. Not really. He doesn't even know you're here. So, what do you want, Eliza?"
Her eyes widened. She blinked, and her lips trembled.
"What? Wondering how I would know that?"
She clenched her jaw. "Alpha has given me a mission to make sure you both come home."
"Both of us?" I asked, tilting my head. "Or just Tony and Quillan?"
Eliza hesitated, avoiding my gaze as she wrung her hands together. Her next words were barely more than a whisper.
"It doesn't have to be this way, Matt. Can't you both just be happy with the way things are meant to be?"
I cocked an eyebrow. "The way things are meant to be?"
I leaned closer, meeting her gaze. "You don't really think I'm stupid, hm? That Tony is stupid? You and I both know that bullshit about alphas being the leaders of the pack, providing, protecting, and all that isn't something that Oren ever believed in. He's a killer, a fear-monger--a terrorist, and that's all he'll ever be, and for some reason, you people love it."
"That's not true. Alpha is a great leader. He's going to lead us back to unity under the Goddess, and--"
"What does Oren's scheme for world domination have to do with you?" I tilted my head. "You can't honestly think that you're anything more than a tool to him..."
"Alpha needs me."
I scoffed. "If he did, he would have never mated our mother."
Her eyes widened. She clenched her jaw. "You don't know what you're talking about. Your mother was a part of the plan, and I understood that. And just like her, you should just fall in line, so we can all-- what's so funny?"
I smiled pleasantly, remembering my mother's empty smile, her fear, and the bone-deep anxiety that was written in her every movement in my memories.
"You."
"You remind me of her. You always have," she hissed. "Not knowing how good you have it, how lucky you are--"
"My mother never wanted him."
Her eyes widened.
"I can't even say for certain that she ever wanted children either, but she never wanted them with Oren... She didn't want the chains of Blue Moon, the small world. She had dreams of so much more, and she was well on her way to achieving every one of them, far outside of the tiny, insignificant world of the three packs... And he knew it. And he didn't care. And he didn't give her a choice." I narrowed my eyes. "Tell me, if she was your daughter, would you want that for her? Would you want her to kill herself because it was the only way out?"
Eliza's eyes widened as she stared up at me. "That doesn't matter--"
"Oh, but it does," I said. "Your daughter is unmated, isn't she?"
She swallowed audibly. "Matt--"
"Still of child-bearing age, hm? Strong, submissive--"
"Stop it."
"And you're not exactly as spry as you were." She shut her mouth, paling. "A female werewolf's greatest--"
"Shut up," she snarled. "Shut your fucking mouth, you little brat!"
I grinned. "So we get the truth. So glad we can speak frankly now."
"You know nothing," she said, her eyes glimmering with tears as she sneered at me. "That bitch you call a mother was--"
"I wonder how many children he'll get out of your daughter before she figure out a way out."
"Stop it--"
"I wonder if one of their kids will find her or if it'll be one of your grandchildren. Maybe it'll be you--" I smirked. "Maybe you'll see her on her knees servicing him the way you do for a bit of food--"
"Shut up!" She hissed. "Alpha would never betray me like that. I--I-- After everything I've done. I deserve to be luna! That wench was in the way, but she was necessary. She's not here anymore. The position is mine."
I tilted my head, staring at her. The callous way she was so focused on being with Oren was almost... amusing. I thought her maternal instincts were complicated, but this revelation cleared everything up.
She didn't have maternal instincts.
"Denial isn't just a river in Egypt." She snarled at me. "You and I both know that Oren isn't looking for a luna. Our mother wasn't his luna. She was a trophy--a breeder--a slave, and you?"
I scoffed. "You're just entertainment."
I turned as she seemed to go into shock at my words and left her there.
"We're not going back. We're going to have a great life away from the pack, so you all should just get comfortable in the hell that you've brought upon yourselves."
Eliza didn't follow me back to the waiting room. Smart of her. I wasn't sure how much longer I could keep my temper in check. I wasn't sure what else would come out of my mouth. When I got back, Tony was still talking with the doctors, and more people had left the waiting room. There was an empty spot next to Quillan. As I settled next to Quillan, he giggled.
"That's a lot of snacks."
"Well, I wasn't sure which would be best." I watched Eliza slip out of the hallway and out toward the exit. "Pick what you like."
"Can I have the chocolate things?"
I grinned at him and shuffled the snacks around. "Have at it, kid."
He smiled and took the package of chocolate muffins from the top. Maybe they were cookies. I didn't care, and it didn't matter. I sat back and popped open the can of coffee for myself with a deep sigh. Tony turned back, and I lifted his can over my head in salute. He nodded again, and another nurse came to him. Quillan hummed happily and ate. I opened a package of what looked like a cookie and put one in my mouth. It tasted like ash and blood. I gagged and swallowed past it, trying not to alert Quillan.
Then, I picked up the coffee and took a tentative sip. It tasted just the same.
The coppery, dry taste remained as I kept trying to swallow it down.
Then, I felt a warm trickle down my upper lip. I reached up. My hands were shaking. My heart pounded as I touched my nose, and my fingertips came away stained with blood.
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