289

Matt

Moments stretched on. I braced myself for the worst. Then, he turned back to the woman.
"Lilith," he said, his voice filled with affection. "I didn't know you knew Matt."
Lilith? The name poked at something in the back of my mind. She smiled back at him, her eyes twinkling with warmth.
"We just met today." She wiggled her eyebrows. "Oren's lackey chased him into the subway."
Trent's eyes narrowed. He glanced at me briefly. She placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Pack business. I hear it's hard feeding a bunch of werewolves when you don't care about anything but spending money how you like."
Trent's shoulders relaxed, and he chuckled. "I wouldn't know anything about that. David and Blue account for every penny and make sure the residuals have residuals…"
I worried my lip, watching them, shuffling my feet. I wanted to escape, but that anxiety was pushed down. I felt a wave of calm wash over me.
He knows, my mother whispered.
My heart seized at that. Trent's gaze turned back to me. His gaze was searching. There was no hostility, but I was braced for it. Suddenly, the book slipped from my hands and floated to the counter.
"Put it on my tab," Trent said and turned to Lilith. "Could we borrow your back room, Mistress Ashgrave?"
She beamed at him. "You were always my favorite son-in-law."
I blinked. Son-in-law? I looked at Lilith. This woman was my grandmother? I had questions. They fought for words and sense and order, but I couldn't get them out.
Trent approached me slowly, cautiously almost.
"Can we talk?"
My jaw trembled. My heart pounded in my chest. I was too goddamn old to feel like this, yet I nodded shakily. He walked me back beyond the books. He ushered me into a seat before taking the other.
I had never felt so young and unprepared for a conversation in my whole life. Trent settled into the seat across from me. I dropped my gaze to the table. My heart sank as I realized that this conversation was more than I was ready to deal with right now. Trent was my biological father. Had he ever known? When he had found out? Had he found out when I did? Had Lilith told him? I can't help but feel a sense of betrayal and anger welling up inside me. How could my own mother keep this secret from me? What was I supposed to do with all of this now? In the middle of everything with Blue Moon and Ginevra's situation?
My life was about to change, and I wasn't ready for it. I couldn't be here. I was about to push to my feet.
"I—"
"Have you been to a healer?"
I looked up, meeting his gaze. I dropped my gaze to everything he'd pulled out while I had been in my own mind. I didn't recognize any of it, but as Trent's eyes met mine, I could see the pain etched into every line of his face. It's a pain that I recognize all too well, a pain that's been haunting me for years, that I had been trying to forget and escape from in ways that had never necessarily made sense.
I swallowed and nodded.
"They prescribed you a course?"
I winced. "S-Sort of."
"Could I see?"
I fumbled for the bag I had been given. The vials rolled across the table. I flushed as a wave of light corralled the vials and stood them all up. He narrowed his eyes at the vials.
"A week… at half doses." His eyes jumped up to me. "You need more than that."
My face burned. "I… Well… with everything that happened with Oren and…."
"You're hiding it," he said softly. "I understand why, but you're not going to last much longer. It's not money…" He paused. "Though, perhaps it is from what I understand of the Blue Moon financial situation."
"It's not…" I said. "I… Investments and stuff."
"And Eve's estate?"
I looked up at him, my eyes widening. I wasn't sure how to respond, how to process those words, or what they meant, let alone the fact that this man, who I've always believed to be a stranger, knew something like that existed.
I swallowed. "I don't know."
"… I would be happy to look into it for you," Trent said. "Your grandmother would be just as happy."
My chest clenched tight. "Could we…"
I stammered my voice barely above a whisper. "I-I didn't know. I just found out. My lineage test…"
"I know," Trent said, his expression softening slightly. "I understand."
He looked down. A bittersweet happiness glinted in his eyes.
"Eve never spoke to me, not directly anyway, after the day Oren…" He set his jaw. "She kept you a secret from me, from the world, to protect you."
I shake my head, my heart aching with a sense of loss and betrayal.
"I don't understand," I say, my voice trembling. "Why couldn't she just… Why couldn't we just…"
"Leave?" Trent sighed, his eyes clouding over with sadness. "The same reason it was so hard for Lucy to leave Blue Moon."
My stomach lurched. I could taste her skin. I could hear her moaning. I could see her tearful eyes. They melted and mingled with my mothers, and before I realized it, I was up and searching for a bathroom. I felt Trent's hands on me, guiding me to a sink. I threw up nothing but blood and bile. I choked and coughed.
The sense of loathing and shame crashed down on me. I could hear my own voice from not so long ago. Trent rubbed my back and spoke to me.
"There's nothing…"
Trent hushed me. "Deep breaths, or you're going to pass out."
I leaned over the sink, not willing to move. "I'm no better than him…"
"That's not true," Trent said. "Oren…. is fully aware of the cruelty he inflicts. He enjoys it, revels in it… You are remorseful, and that may not make a difference to Lucy, but it should make a difference to you."
I sniffled, dry heaving. "Even if it did… I don't know if I could ever forgive myself."
For not knowing, for not listening… For being so deep into everything I'd been taught…
"Would it be fair to blame a child soldier for the lives they've taken?"
My stomach churned. Images from a course on war from college flashed through my mind. I shook my head.
"Like it or not, Matthew, you are barely a step away from a child soldier. We can talk about it, you can work through it, but one day, you will have to come to peace with that and the fact that this war started long before you were even an idea."
I sniffled, letting the words sink in. When I didn't feel like I was going to puke anymore. I sat up.
"Your mother loved you… more than anything, and she did what she thought was best for you."
"I've… never heard of your coven."
"We prefer to keep a low profile…We've been aligned with Blood Moon since long before the Moon Wars."
I winced, thinking about David. "You work for a teenager who hates me."
He laughed. "David doesn't hate you all that much. He is in love with Lucy, though, so he's got some animosity towards you, but…"
"Does he know?"
"I haven't gotten around to telling him yet, but I think he's worked out most of it."
I cursed. "P-Peter saw me in the hospital."
"He'll be looking into why you two are here and how long you've been here."
I nodded.
"Can you tell me more about her?" I ask, my voice barely above a whisper. "About who she was… who you were together?"
"Sure…. after you clean up and I get something on your stomach."
I nodded and let him help me rinse my mouth. He steered me to lie on a couch. Within a few minutes, there was something hot in my hands, a warm blanket over me, and a cool compress on my head. It was all perfect.
"How'd you know?"
Trent nods, his expression softening once more. "Eve and I were in training together. She'd get sick like this when she pushed herself too hard… It was part of the reason she wrote that fancy recipe book." He took a deep breath. "Eve was a remarkable woman. She was a true white wolf shifter and a healer, just like you before she was infected. She was a member of the White Moon Pack, and she was loved by everyone who knew her."
I frowned. "Infected?"
"Oren's doing… Then, he went in front of the Council, declaring they were mates… there was no means to fight for the testing as the liaison at the time was as corrupted as they came, and the compulsions on her were strong."
"I thought… The White Moon Pack were all werewolves."
Was everything I knew about werewolves a lie?
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