Not Interested
I pass the following days as if in a trance.
I tried to speak to Ralph several times, but I was unsuccessful. Each time I hear another excuse. Then he is busy finishing work so he will be free to go on a honeymoon with me, then again he is on a business trip and comes back late. Every time I try, I'm faced with another reason why I can't meet him.
I spend a lot of time with Elena.
She is so lively and has much to say about the school and her friends. The child really distracts me from my problems and I enjoy her presence at the Palace. I don't know what I would have done if she wasn't with me just now when all this was happening. She really is a lifesaver. But not only my life is miserable at this time. Chief Warrior Ivor is also nearing the end, suffering from his mate's behavior. Elena still ignores him, she doesn't even want to talk about him. Several times Ivor has attempted to speak to her, he has pulled all kinds of stunts to be alone with her to apologize. Yesterday he tried to stop the elevator Elena was in and lock himself in with her. He thought this would force her to listen to his reason for not telling her earlier about his true nature.
But Elena was quicker, and Ivor had to watch painfully as the elevator doors closed in his face.
The man is really at his wit's end now, a mate who ignores you is the worst thing that can happen to a wolf. That makes me wonder again how I managed to live without Jasper for so long. He said we had been mates since we were eighteen, which is longer than five years ago. Ooohh Moon Goddess, if only he could come now and take me with him! Does he already know that Ralph has brought the ceremony forward, I wonder. Presently I am standing on the balcony overlooking the Palace gates. For the umpteenth time, I stare into the distance, hoping to see Jasper arrive. But that just doesn't happen. Where is my mate? I ask myself, agitated.
"Saray! Elder Nicolas is here," I hear Alidya call out.
With a sigh, I turn around and walk to the entertainment room. And there I see the Elder standing, but his aura feels strange. Something intangible hangs over him. "Elder," I say respectfully to the man who looks at me closely. "Saray," he addresses me now. I frown, earlier he was calling me the Queen. I wonder what caused this change. "For the first time I witness a she-wolf who is uninterested in her mating ceremony," he reproaches me in a conspicuously even voice. "I have blessed three Royals on their special day and attended the coronation of an additional five. But you are an exception when it comes to the enthusiasm expected of you".
I sigh deeply and remain silent.
When several seconds have passed without either of us uttering a word, I hear the Elder again. "Saray, is there anything you want to confide in me?" he urges. Goodness, first Randall and now the Elder. They are not my best options to pour my heart out to. Both have Ralph's best interests at heart. But perhaps they suspect something; after all, they are old and experienced wolves of the highest rank. "Elder, what could be going on?" I counter his question. When he remains silent, I sigh again. "You are here to see me, Elder? Is this what it is about? My lack of interest in mating?" I ask him again.
"No, I'm here for a rehearsal. Everything has to run smoothly tomorrow, you can't afford to be hesitant or not know what to do in front of all the guests," he lectures me.
His words mentally sink me deeper into the abyss. All day I have wanted to forget that doomsday is already tomorrow. And now that the Elder is holding it out to me, I am close to despair. Jasper must come, and soon.
And then it happens.
The next hour was a complete disaster. I can barely concentrate and am doing everything wrong. The Elder and Alidya are about to lose patience and still, I can't remember anything I'm told.
Finally, the Elder gives up. "Goodness! Not only do you have no interest in what is about to happen tomorrow, but you make no effort to make it easy for us," he exclaims in frustration. "First, you and the King won't wait for the Oracle to decide your day, and then when you still choose to have the ceremony in two months, you bring it forward at the drop of a hat," he lashes out. "Do you really need to put others' lives over the top with your thoughtlessness? Why are you having the ceremony if you are not ready to mate the King?"
Emotionally a wreck, I now run out of the room.
Tears roll down my cheeks; it's all too much for me. When the elevator stops on my floor, I scramble to my apartment. Once in my bedroom, I remove my clothes and step into the bathroom. I consider that half an hour in the bathtub will do me good.
With a jolt, I wake up. Someone taps me on the shoulders. "Saray, you fell asleep in the bathtub," Elena softly tells me. "Step out, dry off your body and come lie down for an hour. You looked so stressed when you came in".
Confused, I look at her.
"Were you in my apartment all this time?" I ask her, remembering that I was just naked in my bedroom. "Yes, I had fallen asleep on the couch in the sitting room when I heard you open the door," she explains. "But you looked so incredibly sad, I thought you were going to get right into bed." She goes back and pulls out a large towel from a closet that she holds open for me. "Come, dry yourself. I'll get you a dress, then we can both take a much-needed nap in your bed," she suggests.
Five minutes later, I'm lying in my bed with Elena beside me, deeply asleep....
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