Chapter 109

NATHAN

After the diploma ceremony ended, everyone, including guests and university students, were invited to the location where a celebration would take place.
While one of the ladies who coordinated the internship program chatted away beside me, I observed every move Kate made. She looked amazing, laughing with her friend just a few meters away. I couldn't stop looking at her. Her body seemed different without the graduation gown, more sculpted. The tight black dress with an open back accentuated her curves perfectly. She also appeared healthier, with her hair loose and shiny, her face slightly fuller, her skin flawless and glowing. And those lips... oh, those lips.

After a few minutes of pretending to be a good listener, I managed to get rid of the lady. But as I decided to approach Kate, I was interrupted halfway.

"Ryan?" I turned around to face Kate's annoying friend.

"Yes?" I tried to maintain a neutral expression.

"Can I give you some advice? Leave her alone, she's doing just fine without you."

"Good evening to you, too, and that's none of your business." I ignored her and continued on my way. Who does she think she is? I would love to put her in her place someday.

Kate was talking to a familiar guy. The damn Grey.

"Excuse me? Good evening!" I interrupted. She automatically stopped smiling when she saw me, and it hurt.

"Good evening! Aren't you Kate's ex-boss?" Her friend butted in. I nodded, completely ignoring his presence, focusing all my attention on her, tired of pleasantries.

"I would like to talk to you, Miss Collins."

"Okay... I'll see you later, Kate," Grey said. Finally. They smiled at each other before he walked away. My heart sank. Did I miss something?

"Are you going to talk to me?" I insisted.

"I have nothing to say. Do you have, Mr. Nathan Ryan?" She avoided looking directly into my eyes.

"If you give me some time..."

"I'll rephrase the question. Do you have anything to say that you think I truly want to hear, Mr. Ryan?"

"I just want you to listen to me."

"Not now."

"When?"

"Maybe after I have some fun with my friends. When I'm leaving." She was testing me. But I knew how to play this game.

"Great."



After an hour, I hated not having a damn whiskey in place. Kate was either laughing or drinking most of the time whenever my gaze found her. It made me reflect on what that Lisa woman said. Was she better off without me? The idea made me feel terrible. I wanted to get up from my seat countless times when the damn Grey approached her.

The wine in my glass needed a refill. I approached one of the tables to serve myself.

"You're still here?" I could feel her gaze staring at my back.

"You said when you were leaving. The truth is, I thought it would take longer." I turned around to face her.

"Yeah, the gang is going to celebrate somewhere else."

"And you're not?"

"In my bed, with my sheets," she said, completely distracting me. Why the hell did she say that? Damn it, I couldn't even pretend I wasn't thinking about that scene. "Do you happen to have a pen?" she asked.

"Yes, why?"

"Can you lend it to me?" I took out my pen from my pocket and handed it to her. She leaned slightly over the table, giving me reasons to avert my gaze, and then handed me a paper napkin. On it, there was an address that I assumed was where she lived now. It wasn't necessary, I already knew where it was, but I kept that to myself.
What was she doing? The gesture would be an invitation for sex in any other situation, but in our case, I was sure it wasn't. I didn't even know why she was talking to me. I expected a completely hostile attitude from her.

"For what?" I asked.

"You want to talk, and I'm tired. I'm leaving."

"Don't you mind if I come to your place?"

"Yes, I mind."

"So?"

"I want to get rid of you. So, I'll listen to you, and you'll stop asking questions, okay?" I nodded. She took a few steps toward the exit.

"Are you going to drive like this?"

"I'm fine." She wasn't fine, not by a long shot. If she were, she would never invite me to her place. But what options did I have?




I parked in front of the small building and got out of the car. The building was located on a quiet and cozy street with a few small shops. I already knew the place. I had come here a couple of times before, but never with enough courage to enter and knock. It was cold, and the weather had a rainy look.

She returned from the back parking lot, and I simply followed her. We climbed the stairs to the third floor without saying a word. This time, I was actually about to enter, after a little over four months. I had to say everything I had planned to say. I could hear my heart beating, the tension taking hold of me. She stopped in front of the door before opening it, then gestured for me to enter.

I entered, and she did the same, then locked the door and walked past me, heading to sit on the couch. The apartment was bigger than it appeared from the outside. Well-organized, just as I expected from her. Her perfume was stronger in the space, which made it even harder for me to concentrate.

"Well, I'm all ears, Ryan!" she said without looking at me, bending down to take off her shoes. Everything I had in mind seemed to have vanished. Suddenly, I started to think that anything I said would sound foolish.

"It would be great if you at least looked at me," the words slipped out, and I was afraid I had started on the wrong foot. She raised her head with an ironic smile. Damn it, I missed him.

"Sorry, I forgot that you love attention. Please continue." Then I realized it would be easier if she wasn't looking at me that way. It wasn't the same look as before. Maybe it was a trick, but she seemed to be looking at me the way she looked at anyone else. Where was that look?

"So?"

"I..." It was hard to be sincere when she was demonstrating to be indifferent. I was about to bet all my chips on something uncertain. Her feelings might have changed. Something really seemed to have changed in her. She seemed more of a woman, more mature.

"Do you have something to say or not?"

"Do you still believe in that?" She sighs, staring at the ground.

"So, it's about that? Is it still about your ex?"

"Yes."

"It doesn't matter to me anymore. It's just the past now."

"Does that mean you still believe it?"

"I just think it's irrelevant to talk about it now."

"Am I irrelevant to you now? Is that it?"

"I've changed, Ryan. Some things have changed too," she stood up.

"What did you feel for me?" I asked, with a lump in my throat.

"Yes," it was like taking a punch to the stomach.

I approached, close enough to make her inhale and look away for a few seconds. She didn't seem so indifferent to me when I was that close. I knew her signs. "Look at me. What you're trying to say is that you forgot everything that happened between us? That me coming here is irrelevant to you, and you're just trying to be nice by listening to me?"

"Forget isn't exactly the word, maybe move on. You wanted to talk, and I'm listening. But if your intention was to come here and find something that stayed in the past... I'm sorry."

"Not a day has gone by without me thinking about you all this damn time," I stared at her, almost touching her face. "And you simply say you moved on? You're a bitch, but you're a terrible liar." She stepped back, smiling.

"Look... the insults are back," she walked over to the kitchen and grabbed something from the fridge as I approached. She poured water into a glass. "Maybe you're right about one thing," she changed her tone, standing up and sitting on the countertop next to the window, taking a sip of water. "Some things can't be forgotten, and I'm not talking about sentimental nonsense. I'm talking about the physical, the chemistry, the touch, the pressure. Oh, those are practically impossible to forget," she placed the glass on the counter. I was fascinated by her graceful movements and how the light from the window made her look sensual sitting there. "And you, Ryan... you're good at those things." She held the hem of her dress and began to lift it, taking it off completely and letting it fall to the floor. "Do you think you can forget this?" She was wearing only tiny black panties. Her body was indeed different; she seemed healthier and much hotter. Everything appeared firmer. I wanted to take a step closer to confirm it with my own hands, but she stopped me with a gesture, telling me to stop. "Did you hear what I asked?"

"What are you doing?" I asked, almost in a whisper. She smiled. I was still trying to process it. Did she just undress in front of me? How much had she been drinking? Was I a danger to her now? I definitely wouldn't be able to control myself.