Chapter 85
KATE
Lisa is wearing a strangely subdued black dress, with her hair tied in a ponytail. She holds a mug while typing something on her phone.
"Good morning!" I get her attention. She opens a big smile upon seeing me and I approach her, receiving a tight hug.
"It feels like you've been gone for a year, not three days."
"Is everything alright here?"
"Yes, yes." I head towards the kitchen.
"And you? How was it seeing your father again? And the supposed emergency?" He raises his well-defined eyebrow.
"I'm sorry... for not being completely honest with you."
"I knew."
"I apologize."
"Tell me, I still have ten minutes."
"There wasn't an emergency, I just needed to get away from..."
"Ryan. I knew it!"
"Yes... I actually thought about giving up on everything."
"That cunning bastard! I'm going to put an end to him," she mutters through clenched teeth.
"He followed me."
"What?"
"I know! It's crazy!"
"What did he go there for?"
"He said he wants to give it a try."
"What do you mean?"
"I know it's a huge mistake to agree to this, but I said yes."
"Kate... this isn't good. I'm confused."
"Damn it! I'll probably end up screwing myself over, but I want Lisa."
"Kate..."
"I know. I know. He's a bastard who sleeps with women and then discards them, without caring about their feelings."
"Exactly."
"I don't have a strong argument to make you understand why I'm doing this. But I've decided that I'll give it a try, in my own way." She looks at her phone screen.
"We'll have a serious talk when I get there, and you'll explain everything properly."
"Alright."
"You should hurry, too, if you still have a schedule to keep." She squints her eyes, regretting her last remark. "Sorry, I didn't mean that." Did my best friend just indirectly call me a slut who sleeps with the boss?
"It's okay. Um... good morning." I head towards my room.
"Kate?"
"Everything's fine."
Why does he make me forget these things? He makes me forget that people will see me as someone who slept her way to success. He manages to make me ignore my reason, but just one disapproving look is enough to remind me of how everyone will perceive me. And if Lisa, who knows me better than anyone, said something like, "You don't need to be on time, after all, you sleep with the guy who pays your salary." What will others say?
In the end, it's always good to take a gut punch that brings you back to reality.
I enter the elevator, and before the doors close, I see Meg appear.
"Kate!"
"Hi, Meg!"
"How are you?" Fucked, and not in a good way. I can't even control my bad mood.
"I'm fine. And you?" I force a smile.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. Did everything go well during my absence?"
"Ryan didn't stay here for more than five minutes."
"I think he had a trip."
"Oh!" The elevator stops on her floor. "Lunch today?"
"Sure."
"See you later then!" She says before exiting.
"See you!"
Would Megan understand if I told her? She's been here for years, knows Nathan, knows what he's like. Maybe she would understand why I can't stay away from him.
Bad idea, Kate. Forget it. No one can know. I don't know if I can not care about what people will think if they find out someday. How can I not care while they judge me as a slut?
No one needs to know, no one except Lisa. That's bad enough. I repeat to myself as I leave the elevator. I go to my desk, practically dragging myself. Damn it. I'm so angry at Lisa for speaking like that. How could she say that? She's my best friend. Damn it!
I have a stack of papers to organize. It's going to take almost the whole day. I have no idea what Nathan has on his schedule for today. No meetings, please.
I settle in, quickly glancing at my phone. There's a new message notification on the screen. It's from John. Great! I hear the elevator arrive. Nathan appears, wearing a gray suit, perfectly groomed with stubble. I try to ignore how appealing he looks.
"Good morning, Collins!"
"Good morning!" I don't take my eyes off my files as I turn on the computer. I hate that he's in a good mood. Don't be a jerk, Kate.
"Any problems?" He stops in front of my desk. Damn it, his cologne is enough to make me want to fuck him and forget everything else. I rub my forehead trying to forget the idea, which makes me squeeze my thighs, imagining his stubble grazing between them. That would be great. "Collins?"
"Yes... I mean, no. Everything's fine."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Then why did it take you so long to respond?"
Don't tempt me. Not here, not now. My head is starting to throb. Everything is so confusing. I stand up and go around the desk.
"I need coffee. Do you want one?"
"No, thank you."
"Okay. I'll be right back." I head towards the elevator, then I hear him clear his throat. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and turn back to him. "Any problem?"
"Mr. Ryan." He corrects me.
"Any problem, Mr. Ryan?" I roll my eyes.
"Are you really going to get coffee with so much work to do here?"
"When you ask me to get you a damn coffee as if I were a waitress, it's fine? But I can't do the same for myself?"
"Don't you realize yet that I'm the boss?"
"No provocations." He shakes his head, pretending not to understand. I return to my desk, stepping hard, and sit down.
"What happened?"
"I'm getting back to work." I smile sarcastically.
"Not that. Why are you upset?"
"I'm not upset."
"Since you don't want to talk... We need to go over today's schedule." I nod. He turns and heads towards his office but stops. "Collins?"
"What?"
"I changed my mind. I will have a coffee." Damn it.
"Alright. So..." I grab my agenda and a pen, stand up, and walk towards him, stopping in front of him. "I'll wait for you in your office, sir. Oh, and if it's not too much trouble, could you bring one for me as well?" He smiles and licks his lips. Oh God, why? I won't be able to keep my hands off him like this.
"Come in." He gestures towards his office door.
After entering, I sit in front of his desk, and a second later, I feel his breath on my neck. "No provocations." He whispers. My whole body shivers. All I want is to ask him to take off my clothes and fuck me. I need to get rid of my annoying and sensible conscience that stops me from doing it.
"Okay." My almost-whisper reveals my desire.
"Remember, it was you who included the no-sex rule here."
"Right."
"Why are you being monosyllabic? Do you want to remove the rule?"
"No." Yes. I do. Now. Please. Damn it, Kate, control yourself. "Let's... continue." I shake my head, trying to clear my mind. I wait for him to sit.
"Can we?"
"Yes."
"Hmm... You have a meeting at two with the marketing director. Then you have a scheduled appointment with Mrs. Clark. Julie just informed us that she won't be able to attend in the late afternoon."
"Alright. And tonight?
"Huh?" I meet his gaze and then understand.
"I was thinking of having dinner or something, whatever you want." He shrugs. It seems like he's taking this attempt seriously. But 'whatever I want' is more than I expected. Although I'd love to spend the night with him, I need to sort things out with John first.
"I can't. I promised Lisa I would help her with a work-related matter.
"Will it take all night?"
"Yeah, I think so."
"Seriously?"
"Yes."
"Can't she wait?"
"No." He exhales and presses his finger against his lips. I can feel his frustration. Damn it, why does that turn me on so much?
"Alright. We're done. You can leave."
"Seriously?" Don't act like a spoiled child.
"You can leave now, Miss Collins."
"Are you kidding me?" He gives me an authoritative look. "Fine."
It's fine to be frustrated, but this? He's exaggerating. Even though I'm dying to spend every second in bed with him, I need to sort things out with John tonight. I reply to his message at my desk, confirming our meeting at eight.
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