CHAPTER 58: THE CONFESSION

Juan never thought that what she started will end up like this. The two were seated on the sofa and Julian wasn’t letting her hand go. Juan was someone with secrets, so it wasn’t a surprise that Julian had his too.

As long as it didn’t involve Julian using her, she was cool with everything, “tell me about it.”

Juan took a deep breath, he was a bit scared to talk about this to Juan, he was afraid that Juan may take it personally and ditch him. His heart will not be able to take that.

“I was around fifteen when I first met her, she was like an angel and at that time I knew that she had become my first love. I couldn’t confess my puppy love to her because she was older than me but she was very nice to me. I thought that as soon as I am old enough, I can confess my feelings for her but at sixteen she got engaged to my uncle. It was the most painful moment of my life.”

“I felt as if I had been denied of what belonged to me, so I didn’t take it well and went through a rebellious stage. I thought that she will come back to me and lead me to the right path but I was just a fool. She only saw me as a child and I did my best to move on.”

“Babe, I can’t consider myself a saint, I have been with numerous girls before and this affected my reputation a lot but I wasn’t worried as someone from a big family like mine will always find someone to marry at the end of the day.”

“Since the only person I loved was with someone else, I thought that it didn’t matter who I married to as long as the deed was done but when I was eighteen, I suddenly became impotent for no particular reason,” his voice was filled with sadness as he made this painful confession.

Juan who had been listening to Julian as if she was in a café listening to a story suddenly woke up when she heard the word impotent. How can her man be impotent?

She had personally felt that thing poking her and that doesn’t happen when someone is impotent. Was he trying to prank her?

Seeing the angry look Juan was giving him, Julian decided to explain himself quickly before she erupted.

“I don’t know what happened but it was like that for over two years. The girl who was supposed to be my fiancée broke off the engagement when someone exposed that I am no longer able to do it.”

“Everyone who knew me made fun of me and my friends abandoned me but some remained by my side and I am grateful for that. Because of the pain and heartache, I felt during those years, I closed off my heart. I caused a lot of problems for my family and my mom did her best to find me, someone, to live with but I denied it all until you came along.”

“At that time, I wanted to deny this, I even investigated you and I hated the fact that someone like you wanted to use me to climb the ladder but when my mom kept on praising you, I decided to look at you with my own eyes and judge for myself.”

“Surely, you were different from how I imagined but I didn’t want to accept it that I fell for the woman that my mother picked for me. So, I tried hiding my feelings until the day I rushed to you. I was afraid that you will be swayed by other men out there and not look at me. I know that what I did was selfish but I swear to you that it wasn’t your looks that made me fall for you but I am genuine to you.”

“I have never been serious about someone like this before even the woman who I considered to be my first love. Juan, I want you to know that you mean the world to me and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I know that it is a bit early and we don’t know much about each other but you are the person I want to be with and this is something that will not change.”

“So, Juan can you see my heart for you?” Julian’s gaze and emotions were sincere.

Juan was sensitive to emotions so she could tell that Julian didn’t lie to her from the word go and his feelings for her were genuine. She didn’t know what came over her and tears began to stream down her cheeks.

Julian seeing Juan crying, thought that he said something that spooked her the wrong way. He quickly embraced her in his arms and began to shower her with sweet, coaxing words.

Juan ended up stopping crying as her ears were about to itch just listening t all those words from Julian.

“You didn’t say anything wrong; I am just feeling sad that you went through all that,” she sniffed as she rubbed her face against his chest.

Julian was relieved when he heard that, he ran his fingers through her long hair before planting a kiss on top of her head, “I thought that what I said made you feel uncomfortable.”

“No, it’s not like that anymore,” she lifted her face and smiled at him, “thank you for telling me this. It really means a lot to me.”

“I just want you to know that even though I am young and haven’t achieved much in life, I am serious about you,” Julian seriously spoke and this action made Juan
laugh.

“You are still a student and have a long way ahead of you to achieve great things. I believe in you,” she said with a smile and planted a smooch on his chin.

It was every man’s dream to have a woman who will always stand by his side and believe him. Her words made him feel ambitious and began to rethink his life goals once more.

“Umm, for you I will become a better person. So, what do you think about my feelings for you?” he was anxious and nervous when he asked.

Juan giggled coyly sensing Julian’s nervousness and she sat comfortably so that she was gazing at Julian, “since I agreed to be with you, it means that I gave my heart to you. I will not say much about my past as reopening the wounds but I want you to know that I will not leave you but remain by your side. I have many secrets and it is not time for me to say much as it may bring you danger.”

Hearing her serious tone, Julian was nervous and curious about what secrets Juan was keeping from him, “I can protect you.”

“You need to have a lot of power darling to protect me and that will require you to work hard so until you are strong enough, I will not put you in danger. I will give you something for your impotence, so don’t stress for I am with you.”

Julian looked at Juan with an ambiguous expression, he didn’t know what to do.