Chapter 58

Chapter 58

Jay and I stayed cuddled together until it was time for me to go. He didn’t want me to leave until the last minute, milking as much time with me as he could. Personally, I think it was because he truly didn’t want me to go meet Cyrus. The thought of me being alone with Cyrus really bothered him. If we were ever officially dating, I can tell Jay would be the possessive type. What’s his was his only and anyone threatening that became the problem. Here, Cyrus, to him, was the problem. Ironic isn’t it? 

“So, how long are you gonna be gone?” He started asking questions. 

I laughed, pulling out a dress that I thought was cute. Simple, but cute. “Why are you asking, Jay?” I said, amused by him. 

Shrugging, he leaned back on my bed, watching me get dressed. “No reason. It’s not like I was planning on waiting for you in your room or anything like that.” He scoffed. 

This guy was something else. “Way to be discrete about it.” I joked. 

Jay’s anxiety was through the roof. It’s the most on edge I have ever seen him before. The way he shook his foot rapidly was not something I ever seen him do. The look in eyes showed me he was thinking about every scenario in the book. None of them being pleasant scenarios in his head. There was no need for him to get so stressed out, though. It’s not like Cyrus and I never been alone before. But I guess he didn’t realize his feelings for me until now. That was the key difference in this whole debacle. 

Once I finished getting dressed, I sat in front of him, stopping his leg from shaking. Before he knew it, I smacked him across the face as hard as I could. It wasn’t ethical, but it was the only way he would stop his obsessive behavior. If there was any hope of a poly relationship, it would not suit Jay. 

“Would you stop this? You act like it’s the end of the world if I go somewhere with Cyrus.” I say over his attitude. 

Rubbing his cheek, he sat up. Still not over my date with Cyrus. “What exactly does this date comprise?” He wouldn’t stop worrying. “I’m sorry I’m not comfortable with you around someone else who is also just as crazy about you.” 

“Well, you need to be. Besides, Cyrus and I were a thing first. You don’t exactly have a leg to stand on.” I argued. 

“I wasn’t saying I did, I just...” He cut himself off before standing up. “You know what, never mind. Have a wonderful time.” He said, before slamming the door behind him. 

There was no getting through to this guy about the situation at hand. I’m trying to be understanding, but I don’t know what else to say to him. Things were uncertain for both of us and losing our cool with each other was not helping. There was no time to worry about it at the moment. Cyrus had a day planned for us and I would not miss it. Though it didn’t mean I was going to give up on Jay. He could use this time to calm down, anyway. 

Washing away the negative energy, I grabbed a small bag and heading outside on the porch. It was already 4 and Cyrus didn’t show up yet. Waiting patiently, I tapped my fingers against the wood railing before feeling arms wrap around me tightly. Of course, it was Cyrus, and I smiled, eager to see him. He always made everything better. 

“Sorry I’m a little late.” He apologized, still hugging me tightly. 

I shook my head at his nonsense. “You’re right on time, actually.” I reassured him. 

He smiled, letting me go to grab my hand instead. “Good, everything’s ready to go, but we should hurry.” He suggested. 

We started walking hand in hand, things looking familiar. Going through the same set of trees, I realized he was taking me to the same clearing Jay took me to the other day. How could I tell him Jay had already taken me here? He would not be happy to hear that and probably ask me questions I didn’t want to answer. Here’s where the lies come in again. I hated doing it, but what choice did I have? 

The clearing was beautiful like last time, only it was still light outside. Cyrus had a nice setup with a blanket on the ground and candles lit. There was also a little picnic basket like when we went to the gazebo, and I loved it just as much this time. Only, there was an even better view instead of just green grass. It was absolutely perfect and I wouldn’t trade it in for the world. His thoughtfulness was like no other. 

Smiling at me, he took his shoes off, sitting down on the blanket he had laid out. “Do you like it?” He always asked me for my approval. 

I kicked my shoes off as well, sitting on the opposite side of the blanket. “I love it. You never cease to amaze me.” I say, thrilled to be here. “But I have to be honest. I was already here.” 

His face fell. I was afraid of. “Dammit, I knew I should’ve done something else.” He sounds defeated. 

I shook my head as to not worry him. “No, no, it’s ok. It’s not like I was here in this setting. You made it perfect.” 

That made him smile as he grabbed my hand, stroking the top. I didn’t want him to feel like this was a waste. It was merely a coincidence that Jay wanted to come here and talk. Regardless, I loved this time with him and the little dish he had ready for us. It was a simple pasta dish with a side salad and some delicious-looking grapes. He also packed a wine bottle with glasses and my lips couldn’t wait to get a taste of that. 

Pouring our drinks, I opened the container with the pasta and groaned in delight. It was so yummy yet savory at the same time. There was no way he made this. My senses told me Jeremy was behind this. His food was always delicious. My mom would love it if she actually gave him a chance. Which she didn’t have a choice in the matter. I was setting them up whether or not she liked it. She’ll thank me later. 

I focused back on Cyrus as he handed me my glass. We cheer and then eat a bit in silence. We have had little alone time together recently, but the silence was just as good. He’s been busy with last-minute things coming up. While I’ve been busy dealing with his best friend. Something he would loathe. But when we were together, it was always bliss. No outside forces were getting in our way. It was him and me with nothing in between. 

“I used to love coming up here as a kid.” He spoke. “This was like an escape for Jay and I.” 

It was nice hearing him think back to fond memories. Though, it made me feel more guilty about the Jay situation. 

I sipped my wine before smiling softly. “You weren’t lying when you said he was your best friend.” I tried not to sound sad. 

“Of course not. I trust him with everything in me.” He gushed. 

It felt like my heart dropped to the pit of my stomach. Sure, we weren’t official, but it was still wrong of me to feel this way about his friend. While simultaneously feeling the same way about him. Their friendship would be ruined because of me. That was not something I wanted, but there was nothing I could do to stop it. Feelings don’t just disappear in an instant. It wasn’t as black and white as I wanted it to be. But the whole thing was so screwed up. There was nothing I could do without hurting myself or one of them. I fucked up. 

The air shifted, and Cyrus noticed the look on my face. If you were feeling anything around this guy, it would not get past him. It’s like he could sniff out when someone was feeling like crap. Especially when it was me. 

That being said, he stood up, stretching his hand out to me. “As I recall, I didn’t have time to waltz with you two weeks ago.” He smirked. “I think it’s time you repay me.” 

I laughed, taking his hand right away. “Say nothing when I step on your toes.” I joked. 

“Oh stop it, you’re not that bad.” 

We laughed together, doing simple steps before he scooped me up in one arm, spinning me around. I couldn’t contain my laughter. As it shocked me, he picked me up. Looking into his eyes, he smiled, squeezing the hand he was holding. There was not a greater moment than this one. Cyrus was the guy girls dreamt about and here I was getting to have him. No wonder Jenna was so envious. He was the guy every girl wanted to be with in some kind of form. I was lucky that he chose me to share a part of himself with. 

He put me down, gently grabbing my waist. Our foreheads touched as we sway slowly together. I kept my eyes closed, embracing this sweet moment for as long as I could. The effect he had on me was priceless. If we had hours to waste, I would waste them right here. Cyrus was the light in my world filled with so many complications. But he made it all better. So much better. 

“Never change, Cyrus.” I spoke, feeling my emotions over take me. 

He didn’t understand what I was saying, but listened to me anyway. “I’ll only change if I need to for you.” He was honest. “You’re the most important thing to me.” 

He smiled from ear to ear as I pulled him closer to me. “I shouldn’t be.” I said, knowing my wrong doings. “You deserve so much better.” 

Cyrus scoffed, not buying what I was selling. “Correction, I deserved better, but then I found you.” He was always so sweet. “You won’t change my mind, so you better stop trying.” 

Laughing, I hugged him tightly, happy that he always saw the best in me. No matter what, he was going to exalt me, and it warmed my heart. Especially because of the things I knew I was doing wrong. Regardless, my feelings for Cyrus never changed and never will. He was the first guy to show me a world that was unknown to me before. The first guy I fell so deeply into. Next week was going to be tough, but it’ll be worth having Cyrus all to myself.