Book 2: Chapter 8

Chapter 8
Running was the only option at the moment. Seeing his face right in front of me caught me off guard. He would be here; this was his home, after all. Not only is this his home, but this is also his wedding that I'm going to be in. I should have thought this through more, and there was no turning back. The reality of it is that I was not ready to see Cyrus again. The emotions overwhelming me were catastrophic. Is this what being in love feels like? If it is, it fucking sucks!

Running as far as possible, I stopped as I heard him shouting my name. Did he run after me? That wasn't what I expected. His finance was standing right there, and he chose to run after me. That wouldn't make her very happy and only cause more drama. Still, it was nice that he wanted to talk to me again. After all, I have been ignoring him for so long. Now was a better time than any to air our grievances. Who knows if we'll ever get this chance again?

"Autumn, wait!" Cyrus called after me.

I stopped in my tracks, not willing to turn around. Looking into his eyes was bound to make me shiver. Remembering our times together didn't bode well for me because he wasn't a free man. There was no going up to him and kissing those beautifully soft lips. Hell, even a hug seemed inappropriate. Not only that, but the anger harboring inside of me wouldn't magically disappear. It was there, and that emotion was powerful.

Cyrus kept his distance but was insistent that we talk. There were things he wanted to say to me as I did. How would we have a conversation without arguing, though? My heart was broken after all this time. I thought seeing him would put those feelings to rest, but it only amplified them. Especially knowing that he was getting married. I couldn't stop thinking about how this would be our wedding instead of Jenna's.

"Can you please look at me? I've been waiting so long to talk to you." He sounded desperate.

Though his tone was calm, mine was not. "What is there to say? You already made your choice!" I yelled, turning to face him.

"You act like I wanted this! There was no choice." We started having a screaming match.

I scoffed with a roll of my eyes. "Oh, you had a choice, and you chose that!"

Our conversation wasn't going to get anywhere at this rate. We both disagreed on the matter, which was probably for the best. It's been an entire year as it is. What was in the past should stay there. I wasn't going to get in between Cyrus marrying Jenna. Even if he didn't want to, it would be overstepping my boundaries. Besides, seeing him confirmed that my feelings were still hurt. Something that I needed to work through before jumping straight back into something with him. We were in two different worlds now—more than ever before.

Cyrus sighed, contemplating what to say next. Judging by his body language, he didn't want to argue either. There was no clear-cut way for him to say what he wanted without me getting angry. Farah wasn't supposed to determine his love life, yet she did.

"What did you want me to do, A?" He looked defeated. "I had to do what my mom wanted; otherwise, I wouldn't have been able to take over my dad's duties."

"Did you even want to take over your dad's job? It seemed to me like you didn't." I changed the conversation from us to solely him.

He shrugged. "Does it matter?"

"Yes, to me," I say, still worried about his well-being.

That only prompted him to give me a little smirk like it was okay to joke around now. "So you do care despite everything." That made him thrilled.

Of course, I cared. It's not like my feelings were going to disappear quickly. We've spent beautiful moments together, forever etched in my memory. He was the first man I ever allowed myself to open up to fully. A part of me would always be with him in some way. Right now, he's receiving tough love, but I couldn't keep this charade up for long. We will see each other much more over the next two months. It's going to be extremely hard to ignore him.

For now, it wasn't going to be a simple forgive-and-forget. I want him to know how much he hurt me. The emotional drainage was heavy, and I know it was for him. He tried so hard to contact me, but I wouldn't let him. Now here we are in this awkward, argumentative state.

Not amused, I walked past him but was immediately stopped by a grab of his hand. It sent chills down my spine to be touched by him again. Even if it was a measly grab by the wrist, it shot through me, making my knees buckle. Cyrus had this effect on me that was never going to fade. It was a struggle being head over heels for two people.

"Why must you always walk away from me?" He questioned softly.

I removed my wrist from his hand, sighing in defeat. "Because I don't know what else to do. It's not like we can pick up from where we started." I bit the inside of my cheek, turning towards him again.

Cyrus knew this, but that wouldn't stop him from trying anyway. "Okay, so let's try being friends," he suggested. "It's a stretch, but I rather have you in my life in some way than not."

"Would it even be possible for us to be friends?" I Chuckle, "look at the things we did; friends don't do that stuff."

We've kissed on multiple occasions, he's taken me on very extravagant dates, and he has bought me expensive gifts. He also sent me a considerable sum of money that I still have. Friends don't do that sort of thing for each other unless they're fucking, which we were! Not only that, but it sucked to get friend-zoned twice. Cyrus has a reason for it, whereas Jay always makes assumptions. This was not how I imagined things going.

Cyrus smiled. "We're adults Autumn, not children. I know how to be platonic with women."

"You better, or your fiance will murder you," I joke.

He rolled his eyes. "Can we give it a shot or what?" He asked, eager to know my answer.

It didn't seem like it would be a good idea, but when have I ever made sound decisions? "What the hell? I've got nothing to lose in this, so be it." I agree.

That made him happy as his smile grew brighter. "I promise I won't overstep my boundaries," he said confidently.

Part of me wanted him to overstep as much as that was lovely. Even just a little bit, it would be hard for me to be just his friend. Furthermore, I'm staying at Jay's. There's no way he's not going to be coming over there. At least to see Jay; he doesn't know I'm staying there yet. I would be seeing him a lot more than he probably anticipates. How would he feel about me staying at Jay's house instead of his? There was suspicion rising before the final decision day came. Would this raise more uncertainty in him? Regardless, Cyrus and I were friends now. This was going to work out just fine.

There was nothing left for me to say as we awkwardly stood in front of each other. We agreed, and the longer we stood there, the more Jenna would probably freak out. I didn't need her attitude for something so insignificant. After all, I didn't want to be the person who ruined a woman's wedding. It was every women's dream to have something big like this. Hurting her would indeed cause more issues than needed.

I smile slyly. "So, we better get heading back," I say.

He nods, "right; it was great to see you, though."

"Yeah, and congratulations," I said before running back.

Fortunately, they weren't waiting on the porch when I returned. However, Jay was there looking relieved to have seen me. They must have told him what happened, causing him to worry. Nonetheless, I was fine; he had nothing to get hysterical about. It made me happy that he still cared.

"Hey, what's going on? They said you ran off." Jay said, concerned.

I shake my head. "Relax, I went to talk to Cyrus, that's all." I was calm about it.

His face fell a little bit once he heard Cyrus' name. "Oh, how'd it go?"

"Well, let's just say I'm no stranger to the friend zone, thanks to you two." I tried to make it sound light-hearted.

That made him laugh. "It's not like I intentionally did that, ya know."

He did have a point. I took it that way without further asking. Still, Jay also wanted only to be friends, making me think I was worried for nothing. This is for the better for all of us. At least this way, we can all hang out, and it will not be weird between us. Jay and I will take our secret to our graves while Cyrus is left happy with his friendship intact. There was nothing that could be wrong at this rate. It was the fresh start we all needed. Thinking about it now, I was grateful. All that was left was getting through this horrid wedding.

Cyrus finally ended up coming back, and I went to find where the girls were. Jay was still working on his business, so there was nothing else for me to do besides wait. The only thing in the way of my peaceful waiting was Kameron Blake. She wanted to talk to me for some odd reason, and she wouldn't let up until I did. To her, we had more in common than she first realized. However, I was nothing like her. At least, that's what I was going to tell myself.