The Service

Annie

I paused beside Giselda as she hesitated outside of the funeral home. Gerry and I had scoured the city for the perfect location for Milton’s service. I had loved spending time with him again like we used to when we were kids. It was like raising our foxes all over again. Between planning and keeping Giselda from falling apart, we were closer than we had ever been before, which was why he was on one side of her with his arm wrapped around her waist while I stood on her other side, gripping her hand tightly. She turned her hand to look at me sadly.

“I can’t, Annie. I can’t do this. It would make it too real,” she whimpered.

“Giselda–”

“NO! If I go in there, I’ll never be able to pretend that he will walk through the door again. I will never be able to pretend that I will sleep wrapped up in his arms or that after a bad day he will be there to hold me. I’ll never be able to pretend that we can have forever,” she sobbed. “I can’t.”

I pulled her away from Gerry to wrap an arm around her waist while I pushed her face into my neck. She continued to sob as she clung to me. I swallowed hard as I met Logan’s eyes. He opened our link, pushing some of his power into me. I gave him a grateful look, knowing that he didn’t want me to overdo helping Giselda again. The last time I had it hadn’t gone well, and we didn’t want Gerry to know that I was pregnant. Our reasons were very different, but the result was the same. Doctor Reyes had given me a potion from the vines to mask the scent of my pregnancy. Where Logan was afraid of Gerry starting shit, I just didn’t want to get in the way of the budding relationship between him and Giselda. It was nice to see that they were sort of bonding, even though Giselda was still fighting it tooth and nail. I knew eventually he would win her over.

She moaned softly into my neck, and I cursed silently as I pulled myself away from my current thoughts. I was a mess, because I had been gently pulling Giselda’s pain away from her for days. Sometimes it overwhelmed her, well both of us, just like it was doing now. The level of pain she was exhibiting was something that I had never felt before, nor did I ever want to feel it again. It was a shitty feeling and I just wanted it to pass already. I hated seeing her so sad. I slowly lessened the pressure of my emotional push until I was removing myself fully from her mind. I raised my hand to tuck her hair behind her ear.

“You can do this, Gilda. I know it hurts. I can’t even imagine how you are feeling, but I am here with you. I will always be here with you. Lean on me,” I murmured soothingly.

“Thank you, Annie. I don’t know what I would be doing without you right now. You’ve kept me from going insane,” she whispered, her voice thick with emotion.

“Don’t thank me, Gilda. We’re family and I would do anything for you.” I met Gerry’s eyes. “Come on, honey. Let’s go inside, and after, we will take you home, and we can rest.”

“O-okay,” she sniffled.

I turned her toward the door and when Gerry went to put his arm around her again, Logan stepped between them, preventing Gerry from touching her. I frowned at him while Marsha surged forward to glare at him from my eyes. I didn’t like how he was acting. Gerry had been here for over a week, closer to two, and Logan was still acting like he was a bad guy. He avoided my eyes, knowing that we would definitely be discussing his attitude later. The further we got into the building, the more Giselda leaned against me, making Logan support her more. I let my aura wrap around her to try to keep her heartbreak at bay.

Once inside the room, where multiple pictures of Milton in various situations in both his human and animal form, Giselda’s legs gave out, making Logan have to scoop her up as loud sobs were torn from her. The sleuth members who were already present, all gave her pitying looks. As Logan carried her down the aisle, I let my aura out warningly, ordering the sleuth to lower their eyes. She didn’t need to be pitied. It was okay for her to be sad. She lost her mate for Goddess’ sake. There was no  other pain like what she was feeling. Even though I had to admit, I had seen bears lose their mates before, but never of them had been as devastated as Giselda was.

I sighed as Logan set Giselda down in front of an artist rendered rendition of a happy Milton. She reached out with a shaking hand to touch his face before turning to look at Gerry who stood a few feet from her.

“Get out! You don’t belong here!” She snapped before bursting out into another round of loud, hysterical sobs.

I moved over to Gerry to lay my hand on his arm, nodding my head toward the door. “Go on, Gerry,” I told him softly. “We got her. We promise she’ll be okay with us.”

He hesitated, his muscle ticking in his jaw before he nodded. “I’ll be just outside. If you need me, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me.”

“I won’t.”

He slowly made his way out of the room with his shoulders slumped. I hated this. He wanted to be with her and support her, but I understood why she didn’t want him around. Milton had been her everything. She had fallen so hard for him in the short time he was at Havana. It almost appeared to be the same type of love that I felt for Logan. As weird as it sounded, I had started to believe that the Goddess’ was building a true fated bond between them. I wish that the bond had been fully forged. It was intoxicating. I moved back to her side, taking her hand again to push even more peace and healing into her while Marsha started trying to make her a little drowsy in the hopes that it would help curb the strength of her emotions. I cleared my throat nervously, drawing Logan’s attention.

‘Is it time?’ He mouthed.

I nodded and he immediately tried to turn Giselda away from the portrait, but she remained glued to the spot where she stood.

“Gilda, come on. It’s time for us to take our seats,” he told her softly.

She took the portrait off the stand before allowing Logan to lead her to four reserved seats on the front row. She sat down, pressing the portrait into her chest. I put my hand on her shoulder while Logan pressed his shoulder against hers. She needed every last little bit of our support, and we were more than happy to give it to her. Doctor Reyes stepped up to the lectern, and I was surprised to see the tears in his eyes.

Giselda closed her eyes as the doctor began to speak about Milton, speaking about how he had accepted every member of Havana with open arms without hesitation. He spoke about how Milton had taken his son under his wing during warrior training, guiding him effortlessly through his exercises. When he was finished, he looked around at everyone before asking if anyone else wanted to say something. I took a deep breath as I stood up.

“I would like to say something,” I said softly.

Doctor Reyes gave me a reassuring smile as I walked up to take his place behind the lectern. I cleared my throat as I met Giselda’s eyes.

“I met Milton at the Grimm Forest College, where we were both attending the veterinarian program. He was always quiet, just sitting back and watching. I never really noticed him until we were at lunch one day, and Giselda and I were being harassed by other males. He stepped up to defend us. After that he was always coming to our aid. I later found out that he was sent to Grimm Forest to watch over me. At first I was angry. I resented being watched, but the more I got to know him, the more I realized how pure and loyal he was. He didn’t hold back, fighting for what he thought was right, even if it went against the rules. He chose us as his sleuth. He didn’t have to, but he did. When he got here, he immediately threw himself into our life, making it better for each person that he met.” I paused to let my eyes drift over Giselda.

“When he came here, I was angry with him, because I thought he was stealing someone away from their mate. It took a very life altering discussion with Logan to open my eyes. After that conversation, I began to really watch how he interacted with Giselda. Their bond was nothing that I had ever seen before. It was so intense, and loving in the purest way. He didn’t love her because he was told to. He didn’t love her because it was predestined. He loved her because he chose to. He loved her because of everything that she is, along with who she is. To him she was perfect. It didn’t matter to him what title she had or what she was capable of.” I clamped my mouth shut tightly for a moment until the urge to cry had dimmed enough to allow me to continue.

“He saw how she cared for people. He saw how she loved her sleuth and how deep her loyalty went. He saw how hard she tried to live her life the right way. He knew how hard she struggled, and he knew how much she enjoyed her time doing things for Havana.” I smiled softly at Giselda. “I may have only two opportunities to talk to him privately, but our conversations were filled with so much love for Giselda that it made my entire opinion on him change. She was his everything. I knew after the first conversation that he would give his life not only for her, but also for Havana. It is a gamma’s job to be willing to do that, but his gamma blood didn’t matter. It was just how he loved.” I paused again as tears began to run down my face, and I didn’t even bother to hide them or wipe away.

“He was taken away from us too soon. He was stolen from Giselda. Her pain is our pain. Everything that Milton did for us during his time as our gamma will forever remain with us. It will forever be the reason that our sleuth got better. Stronger. We will grieve together. We will remember together. And we will move forward together, because that is how we honor him. That is how we keep his memory alive.” I swallowed hard before wrapping up. “And to further keep his memory alive, Alpha Logan and I have decided to take a mile wide portion of our land and name it for Milton. It will be used to train our warriors and we will gather every year for a celebration of his life there. We will not let his passing be the end of his legacy here in Havana. He will always have a place among us, even if he is not here with us right now.”

I swallowed hard again as Giselda got to her feet, placed the portrait in Logan’s lap, and came up to me to give me a tight hug. She buried her face in my neck, sobbing quietly as her tears rolled down my neck.

“Thank you, Annie. For everything,” she told me quietly.

I rubbed her back. “I love him too, Gilda. He was a great man.”

“Yes, yes he was,” Logan murmured as he wrapped his arms around both of us. “One that we will never forget. I promise, Gilda. He will always be thought of.”’

“Thank you,” she repeated. “For being here with me.”

I met Logan’s eyes, unable to say anything around the lump in my throat. His eyes softened as he looked at me, knowing that I was pulling on her emotions.

“We always will be, Gilda. Just like Milton will be.”