Chapter 233

"You're what?" Nicholas asked, frowning as he placed a pillow on his lap, resting on the headboard.

"I'm leaving, Nicholas, it's just two weeks, stop acting as if I'm about to die," Ezra chuckled and slid closer to him.

"It's the same. You're leaving first thing tomorrow morning, and you're telling me now? That's brutal, Ezra," Nicholas sighed, looking sad.  

Ezra pulled him close, "It's an emergency, and I just learned about it when we got out of the shower. I really need to be there for the surgery." He said.

"Can't someone else do it? You have a lot of capable doctors over there; if it must be you, then simply transfer the patient to your hospital over here," Nicholas frowned, "It's not just fair." He muttered. 

Ezra hugged Nicholas, kissing his shoulder, "I'm sorry for the short notice. But, the patient is in critical condition and can't risk travelling. Plus, your boyfriend is the best in the field. It has to be me." He said, chuckling. 

"Ugh, I hate that. Can't you be... I don't know, be nothing, just be mine, and I'll pay you double of whatever you get," Nicholas sounded frustrated. 

Ezra laughed, "You can't, baby. You'd go broke." He kissed Nicholas's cheek and fell onto the bed, placing his hands behind his head.

Sighing, Nicholas lay beside Ezra; he placed his hand on Ezra's cheek and made him look at him. 

"Two weeks max?" Nicholas asked.

Ezra nodded, "Two weeks max. If I get done before that, I'll fly right back to you. Do you think you're the only one missing someone?" He pulled Nicholas closer. 

Nicholas smiled, burying his face in Ezra's neck.

"I already feel incomplete now, I'm probably going to look like a zombie without you by my side," Ezra whispered. 

Nicholas caressed Ezra's face, "Me, too." He murmured.

They hugged each other, basking in each other's warmth and absorbing it as much as they could. This was the last night they'd be together until two weeks later.

"No fucking someone else," Nicholas warned.

Ezra scoffed, "Come on, baby. I'm committed to you. I love you, or you don't believe me when I tell you that?" He asked, looking into Nicholas's eyes.

Nicholas hesitated, "I do. And I love you, too. I was just being jealous." He confessed.

Ezra leaned in and kissed Nicholas's lips, "You're allowed to be jealous, it's hot. But you're not allowed to ever doubt me, ever; okay?" He whispered. 

Nicholas slowly nodded, "You better not give me a reason to doubt you, then." He narrowed his eyes at Ezra. 

Ezra chuckled, "I won't. I promise." He drew Nicholas closer and kissed him.

Since he was leaving the next morning, he would spend his night cuddling Nicholas; he needed the warmth to bear the distance that was coming between them.
***
Cody stood in his room and watched Ida walk toward the resort through his window. 

The night was still young, but it looked like it was going to storm again, so everyone was retiring early. The wind hadn't picked up yet, just a slightly lowered temperature and chillier wind.

But Cody did check the weather, and he was a hundred percent sure that a storm was coming. He only hoped their power wouldn't be affected like the last time. 

His eyes never left Ida; he stared at him as he paused and spoke to one of the bouncers from the club. After a very brief conversation, Ida walked away. 

Suddenly, Cody saw Ida's head turn toward his window and immediately ducked, biting his lip anxiously.

"Damn, I've been reduced to a stalker," he murmured. 

Cody only hoped that Ida didn't see him. It might upset Ida learning that Cody stalked him sometimes...most  times.

Slowly, Cody peeked his face out of the window; Ida was gone.

Disappointed, Cody sighed and went over to his bed and sat down. He placed his chin on his hand and thought of what he could do to get Ida to look at him like he used to in the past.

He couldn't just walk up to him and seduce him. It would only annoy him. What could he do? What should he say? 

Cody pondered deeply, thinking of anything that could get his boyfriend back. 

He admitted to being stupid when he told Ida to stop existing by his side. 

"What was I even thinking?" He muttered, angry at himself. 

"Can't you just love me again, Ida?" He sighed, feeling a sharp pain in his chest as his old memories surfaced.

"I miss you..." He shut his eyes to stop the tears from falling.

This was his routine every night: think about Ida, cry, think about him again, and finally, cry himself to sleep.

Suddenly, he heard the soft click of the door right next to his own. 

Ida was back in his room.

Cody grew anxious, restless.

The kind of longing he was feeling that night was different, it seems like he had finally reached his limit for maintaining distance. He needed to do something, anything, and this time, he didn't care if it was something reckless; his aim was to pass a message to Ida.

Ida can never leave him, no matter how hard he tried. 

He made up his mind. He had a plan. 

If Ida really remained unaffected after tonight, he would have to accept the fact that they were truly over.

A few minutes later, Cody stood in front of Ida's door and knocked on it.

The door was opened in the next second to reveal Ida, looking ready to sleep in his silk grey pyjamas. 

Ida frowned the moment he saw Cody; he never expected him to ever show up in his doorstep again. 

"What is the matter?" Ida asked, pinning Cody with a serious look.

Cody hadn't looked away from Ida's face since the door opened. He had missed that face.

He cleared his throat and looked away, "Can I come in?" He asked gently.

Ida raised a brow, "No, leave." He said.

Ida wasn't in the mood to entertain Cody's drama, so it was better he sent him away quickly and not let it drag out. 

Cody stepped forward but didn't touch Ida. He just stood close enough for Ida to feel his body warmth. 

"Please, I won't take much of your time. I already know you don't want me here, but I still showed up. It shows it's important to me. Please, just two minutes, I promise," Cody begged quietly.

Ida stared at Cody's face for a long time before he stepped away from the door. Two minutes it was, after that, he was asking Cody to leave.

"Thank you," Cody said as he walked into the room.

Ida didn't respond. He slolwy closed his door before he turned to face Cody.

However, he was surprised to find Cody sitting on his bed. There was a sofa by the corner for God's sake! 

"What are you doing, Cody?" He questioned, walking over to his bed to stand in front of Cody.

Cody sighed, "I'm sitting, Ida. Sit, too." He tapped the space beside him.

Ida scoffed, "Don't forget this is my room, Cody. You can't tell me what to do." He stated.

"Okay, then. Goodnight," Cody said and sighed.

Ida gladly stepped back, making room for Cody to leave, but he was shocked instead.

Instead of leaving, he stood, stretched, and climbed the bed, going under the sheets.

"The storm is brewing, Ida. Come to bed, I'll go to sleep first," Cody hugged the pillow and closed his eyes.

Ida couldn't believe his eyes. He must be imagining things; Cody couldn't possibly be lying on his bed at that moment. 

He shook his head at himself; of course Cody was there on his bed, he opened the door for him a few seconds ago.

He was at a loss at what to do. He wanted to throw Cody out of his room, but at the same... Damn! He's missed Cody on his bed.

He shook his head and walked closer to the bed, "What're you doing, Cody?" He asked, his voice cold.

Cody didn't bother opening his eyes, "Sleeping." He replied in a relaxed tone, burying his face in Ida's pillow and burying his nose in it, sniffing it.

Ida gritted his teeth when he saw what Cody was doing; he wasn't here to talk, he was here to tempt him, and... it was working.

Who was he kidding? Of course, it would work; he never stopped loving Cody, but he knew when to draw a healthy boundary for both of their sakes.

He didn't have any problem with being obsessed with someone you love, only if the relationship is stable. But with one like their's: unstable. Obsession was a dangerous tool that would hurt them both.

Cody needed to take a break, Ida didn't think Cody was still thinking straight. If not, why would he be here after literally saying that Ida was dead to him?

Ida sighed. He needed to be the calm one at that moment. 

"Cody, you need to leave. It's obvious you have nothing to say. I don't want whatever it is you're starting. Just leave, please," Ida said calmly.

Cody opened his eyes and stared at Ida. Sighing, he sat up in bed and crossed his arms, continuing to stare at Ida without saying a word.

Ida exhaled, "Stop messing around, Cody. I need you to leave, I've got some important job to do tomorrow. Go." He sounded exhausted.

Cody remained defiant, "There's only two things to do: carry me out of your room, or, come to bed and sleep with me." He shrugged.

Ida balled his fist, "This is exactly why I stay away from you. You don't care about how others feel. You just do what feels right to you, inconsiderate of the other person's struggles." He glared at Cody.

"I should never have trusted you and let me through my door. Leave Cody, you're tempting me," Ida warned.

Cody smiled, "You're lying. I'm not doing what feels right to me alone. This feels right to you, too, Ida. You want me here, I know it; stop fighting it and come over here. And, yes, I'm tempting, you, and you know, just the kind of temptation I'm talking about." He winked at Ida.

Ida slowly shook his head and took a step back, "What do you want, Cody? Haven't you tortured me enough? Can't you just let me go? It's tiring, I promise you." He fixed his hands in his pockets, staring at Cody's face.

Cody climbed down from the bed but didn't hurry to approach Ida. 

He made sure Ida was staring back at him before he spoke, "Can I come closer?" He asked in a calm tone.

Ida raised his brows, "No. Please leave." He replied.

Cody walked forward regardless.

He stopped in front of Ida, reaching out and holding his hand, "I know I said I wanted to talk, but I changed my mind. Talking isn't going to solve anything between us. It was what got us here in the first place. If you you'd just..." he paused and pointed to the bed, "If you'd just hold me tonight... we can talk better in the morning, please." He spoke very softly, pleading with his eyes.

Ida took his hand away from Cody, shaking his head, "You don't understand, Cody. You and I can never be as we were before... something doesn't just feel right anymore... give up." He said, looking away from Cody. 

"I miss you, Ida," Cody whispered. 

Ida balled his fists and went over to the sofa, lowering himself on it.

He stared at Cody and released a soft, self-deprecating laughter. He couldn't believe he was seriously considering what Cody said. This was how unhealthy Cody was to him, making him consider things he knew he would regret later. But he was smarter now. He wasn't going to fall for it.

"You're crazy, Cody. If you think I'm going to listen to what to what you're saying for a second, then you're really crazy. Why should I listen to you? To let you hurt me again?" Ida frowned. 

"Not happening, Cody. I've been through a fucking lot to get myself immune to your shit. So, please, go away. I don't miss you, I don't love you. Stop making a fool of yourself and just leave," Ida scoffed and relaxed onto the sofa, closing his eyes.

The next thing he heard was Cody's footsteps stumping closer to him. He remained unmoving, eyes still closed. It was better if he didn't see the hurt in Cody's eyes. 

Cody marched forward and stood in front of Ida, anger piling up within him. His anger spread when he saw how nonchalant Ida was looking, as if standing there and expressing his feelings wasn't something to be taken seriously.

"When did you become so hostile?" Cody asked, breathing faster to control his rising anger.

"Courtesy of you, leave," Ida answered, unbothered and still closing his eyes.

Cody shook his head, "You're unbelievable." He muttered. 

Ida sighed, opened his eyes and stared at Cody's worked-up face, "You see, you're getting worked-up over nothing. This is leading nowhere... as it shouldn't. So, just hurry and take your leave, you've overstayed your welcome." He advised, looking unaffected but he was dying to hold Cody on the inside.

Cody chuckled, "You know? I cry myself to sleep every fucking night. I think of you, Ida, I miss us; don't you miss us? Don't you miss me?" Cody's voice was so soft it could pass as a whisper. 

His voice reached Ida's heart, wrenching it. 

Ida stood and moved close to Cody, he leaned his face close to Cody's ear and whispered, "You know what? I'm glad I chose to leave." He said.

He was about to walk past Cody when he was suddenly pulled back to stand in front of Cody.

He simply raised an eyebrow at Cody, not saying another word. 

"Why?! Why have you chosen to become a monster, Ida?! I'm literally bleeding from my heart but you remain this cold and wicked beast. You're not the man I fell in love with!" Cody slapped Ida's chest, heaving in anger.

Ida shrugged, "That's great then. If I'm not the man you fell in love with, shouldn't you be on your way? Perhaps to Pole?" He smirked.

Cody was frustrated, he balled his fists and bit down hard on his lip, frowning. "Don't fucking mess with me, Ida, you know I would never do anything with Pole. And..." He raised his hand to Ida's face, placing his palm on his cheek, "I know the man I fell for is still in there, this is just a facade to chase me off, but I'm not leaving, Ida. I'm done leaving." He stated.

Ida smiled, "You're wasting your time. I'm not ready to become your puppet again. Want me today, push me away tomorrow... I'm too tired for that, Cody. Quit it -"

"I want you now, Ida! For good... I miss you so much... it's hard to breathe when I think about what we've lost.  Please, baby, I miss you," Cody pleaded, his hands now holding Ida's cheeks.

Ida sighed, "No. You don't miss me, Cody. You miss having me under your spell, it wasn't love -"

"It was fucking love, for Christ's sake!" Cody pushed Ida away from himself, frowning.

Ida laughed, "You miss toying with my emotions, Cody. You need that control in your grasp, doll, not love." He corrected.

"It's not true, Ida. I never toyed with your feeling, whatever I showed you came from my heart and you knew it. Stop trying to blackmail me, it's not going to make me leave," Cody suddenly grabbed Ida hand and dragged him back to the bed.

He wrapped his arms around Ida's neck and leaned his face closer, "I miss you, Ida, I can't say it enough. I know you miss me, too. So..." he leaned in to kiss Ida but Ida moved his face to the side, avoiding the kiss.

Cody sighed and took his mouth to Ida's ear, "I promise you, if you make love to me right now, we'll be fine by morning. We just need to remind each other how perfect it feels to be together; and, just like the storm that is brewing outside, everything will be over by morning." He bit Ida earlobe before taking his mouth to his neck, placing soft kisses along his neck.

Ida gently slowly turned, holding Cody's face in his hands, staring into his brown eyes, "You want to kiss me, right?" He asked, voice low.

Cody gulped, his jeart pounding as he heard Ida's pant-dropping voice, "Y-yes." He replied.

Ida smirked, "Fine." He murmured and slowly started to lean in, he saw Cody's eyes fluttering shut and smiled.

Cody waited, and waited, but he never felt Ida's lips on his. Frowning, he opened his eyes to see Ida staring blankly at him. "What's the problem?" He questioned.

Ida shook his head, "I just wanted you to know how it really feels to want something and not have it. I wanted you, Cody, you asked me to fucking stay dead to you. Now, what? You want me to run back to you? Fuck off." He scoffed and walked away.

"You want to stay here, right? Goodnight, then." Ida headed to the door, not sparing Cody another glance.

"Don't fucking leave!" Cody yelled out, followed by the sound of a cocking gun. 

Ida halted in front of the door, shocked by Cody's outburst. He slowly turned, his jaw almost dropping to the floor.

Cody stood there, pointing a gun at Ida with a fierce look on his face.

"What the fuck? You have finally lost it, Cody," Ida muttered, staring at Cody's shaky white knuckles that were gripping the gun so tightly.

"Come here, Ida," Cody whispered shakily.