No longer interested in him
Was I angry towards him?
When I had made my decision, I couldn't help but laugh and looked away from him. I couldn't bare to look at him right now. He showed too much emotions and I wasn't used to it. "I would be lying if I said that I'm not. You haven't exactly been the nicest, you know. I never expected to even have a mate so imagine how I felt when I realized that I'm mated to you." I felt eyes brim in my eyes as l recalled everything.
Focus Renee
Don't show your weakness. I murmured inwardly to myself then opened my mouth to talk again.
"The moment I realised it that you my mate, I knew that my life was no longer useful. You one of the people that don't like me and I don't know why I was fated to you",
The weirdest thing was, I was able to tell him my honest feelings without feeling bitterness or any hurt. Like I just accepted that my life would forever be like this. A series of pain.
He nodded his head in understanding and decided to ask another question. "So you must hate me." he said lowly more to himself than to me.
I thought about it again.
Did I hate him?
"I don't know. At this point I don't care what you do anymore Bane. Whether you accept me as your mate or not doesn't matter to me anymore. I've lived my whole life shunned by everyone. You not accepting me hardly makes a difference." My words were laced with truthfulness and hurt. It was true after all. I didn't care what he did anymore.
But I lied about the last part. Him not accepting me hurt so much all I could do is accept it. I tried to fight for my right as his mate, but he made it clear that I was not fit for the one thing that the moon goddess had given me.
"I never said that I wasn't going to accept you."
That's when I looked at him and met his eyes.
Did I hear it right?!
"But you made me feel that way Bane. But like I said, it doesn't matter anymore. All I ask is if you reject me, do it quickly." I tried to put on a brave front and I hoped it worked because after all, it was what I was going to do.
He ran a hand through his jet black hair as he sighed exasperated. "Look, I'm not ever going to reject you." he started. What?"I'm not the ideal mate, that's true and I understand why you do hate." he paused once again before turning back to me.
His deep blue eyes had specks of silver and just looking at them, I was drowning. He seemed conflicted, he wanted to tell me something but he wasn't sure if he should or he didn't know how to.
"And honestly, I have no redeeming reason for my actions. I had just hated the fact that my mate was the sister of Aurora after everything that hsppened, I didn't hate you, I could never even if I tried, but I hated what you were, what you caused." He confessed.
He was sincere, that much was true. However, I didn't know how to feel about it. But at least he was honest, right? That was a good step forward, right?
I already knew it that he hated me because of my sister's death.
"I told myself that I was going to reject my mate if she isnt Aurora and then out of the blue she died. To make matters worse, then the moon goddess chose you to be my mate. Like what the hell did she plan for me", He murmured and I knew it that all this care was pretence.
He will never ever love me.
I ignored the fact that my defences were halted but I didn't bother replying to him.
"The sad thing is, I still don't want the luna they chose for me", He added honestly.
"So what are you going to do about it?", I asked.
"I'm going to present you to the pack as my mate tomorrow." he said all of a sudden. I sat up straight, my eyes widening.
"What?!" I say, surprised.
"It was bound to happen soon. I can't keep hiding you away forever. And I'm almost 25. If by 25 I haven't found my mate yet, I would be forced to mate with Carlo according to Pack's rules."
I pouted just a bit totally hurt. "So you're only presenting me because your deadline is soon?" I said a bit annoyed.
His eyebrows furrowed together as he immediately shook his head. "No, it's not that. I was trying to buy more time." He stated which confused me more. "Buy time for what?", I asked.
"I wanted you to train a bit more because as soon as you'll be presented, Carlo will challenge you for the Luna's position. Ever since you were born this has never happened but our pack offers a chance for the strongest female warrior to become the Luna. It's never happened that the Alpha's mate lose in battles but that's because the previous Lunas were always of Alpha or Beta bloodline or that the appointed lua actually ends up to be the Alpha's mate. You, however..." His voice trailed off.
"Everyone in the pack knows you as a cursed wolf but regardless you will have to fight them", He added then my heart began to pump loudly. I felt like faiting. I couldn't process everything.
I was to fight against one or many of this pack's strongest warriors.
I had no experience in fighting. I only know the basics in fighting, the ones that l used to train myself. How was I to win against her?
"But don't worry." Bane stated again, his hand reaching for mine. My heart had started to beat frantically and I knew it was the mate bond acting up. Surely I wasn't feeling anything for this guy. I didn't care anymore. I'm tired of getting hurt. "I know you'll be able to do it."
"How so?"
He pulls away for a second and shows me a smile.
A smile.
Towards me.
I thought my heart was beating fast enough, but boi was I wrong. I could feel my blood rushing to my cheek, warming them up and staining them.
"Because you're my mate."
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