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Rachel
Something notable was the fact that I didn't even feel the need to rush to the bathroom to face nausea during the flight. Upon arriving in Seattle, the jet lag from the trip left me extremely tired and sleepy. All I could do was take off my shoes and collapse onto the comfortable mattress in one of the guest rooms that Joseph had arranged for me.
I woke up when it was already dark, noticing from the open curtains of the room that it was night. My stomach grumbled as soon as I took the first step out of the room, a result of a whole day without food.
I descended the stairs with some uncertainty, feeling truly embarrassed for having slept so much and not having been able to help in any way. After all, it wasn't just Lindsay responsible for taking care of Joseph; I also needed to do my part.
I found Joseph and Lindsay already at the table, enjoying a full meal. I noticed that it seemed like Lindsay had also cooked, which made me feel even more guilty.
Lindsay was the first to notice my entry into the spacious and well-decorated room, with sober decor, just like the rest of the house. She had a wide smile and didn't seem upset that I had slept so much, just as Joseph smiled when he looked in my direction.
"Look who's finally awake!" Lindsay's enthusiastic comment came quickly.
"I was starting to worry about you, Rachel," Joseph remarked with a hint of amusement. "Come, join us. You've gone the whole day without eating, and that's not good for the baby."
Involuntarily, my body tensed at the mention of my pregnancy. I tried to act as if nothing had happened, quickly moving to the empty chair on the other side of the table, with Joseph at the head and Lindsay to his left.
"I apologize, I was really exhausted," I said, embarrassed. "I didn't mean to sleep so much."
I didn't want them to think I was still the same useless Rachel as before, expecting everyone to serve her. I didn't want to be associated with that negative image, especially now that the past seemed to be resurfacing with our return to Seattle.
"You shouldn't worry," said Lindsay. "Believe me, we also slept almost the whole day, and we're not even pregnant like you."
The joke made me feel more relaxed, and the atmosphere seemed completely relaxed. Dinner proceeded in a friendly atmosphere, making me realize that there was no awkwardness between Joseph and Lindsay.
I learned that Joseph planned to hire some staff, including a cook and a housekeeper. However, Lindsay wasn't willing to accept this idea, but Joseph was determined to follow through with it.
"I can't let this huge house be under your care, especially when Rachel is pregnant, and you can't do everything alone," he stated firmly. "You won't manage, and this is not up for discussion."
I saw a bit of the old Joseph in action, the one I met when we arrived in London, and who wouldn't accept being contradicted when he wanted something. It seemed sensible not to contest, as his expression made it clear that he wouldn't change his mind about his decision.
The residence currently had only a few security guards who took turns on shifts, but according to Joseph, the house used to have more staff when Enrico bought it a few years ago.
"I thought you lived in a retirement home, Joseph," I commented, but I was sure that was the case—"At least, when we went to London."
"I was feeling very lonely in this house, so I decided to move to the home; some friends were already there. But still, even surrounded by people, I still felt lonely."
"You miss your son, Joseph," Lindsay pointed out. "Is Enrico your only family?"
"Yes."
I waited for Joseph's response with anticipation and curiosity, and his firmness left me no room to ask about Enrico's mother. I remembered the woman in the photos I saw in his room, but I never really knew who she was.
"I was thinking of going to the museum this weekend," Joseph commented, drastically changing the subject.
This change of topic didn't surprise us, as he rarely touched on the subject of family, and I believe that had to do with his ex-wife, whom he never spoke of.
"That's a great idea, Joseph," I tried to show enthusiasm, although I was still adjusting to another change inside. "You should go out more, you don't always have to stay at home."
"That goes for you too, Rachel," Lindsay took the opportunity to add.
But how could I walk the streets with my face disfigured by that scar? I didn't have the courage. Even plane trips had been tormenting, as many people looked at me with expressions of strangeness.
"I... don't feel comfortable going out at the moment."
We continued to talk, touching on less controversial subjects, until Joseph retired to his room. Lindsay and I decided to explore each other's rooms more thoroughly.
Like me, Lindsay had also been accommodated in one of the guest rooms, which were decorated with extreme taste and offered all the comfort of a millionaire mansion like that one.
"I never imagined I'd be living in such luxury!" she commented, clearly delighted with every detail. "Look at this!"
Lindsay pointed to a panel on the wall from which emerged a huge TV when she activated the remote control. She seemed to be amazed by something she might never have seen before in her life. In the face of her enthusiasm, I pretended to be equally excited about the discovery.
"So many channels!" she commented, turning on the TV and browsing through the channels. "I can watch so many different things now."
"But we had a TV in the room, and it also offered a pretty interesting variety of channels," I said just to tease her, which made her stop flipping through the channels and stare at me with her hands on her hips.
"But the TV wasn't this size, Rachel!"
Lindsay pointed to the TV again, and we looked in that direction the moment we noticed that a Formula One award ceremony was being broadcast. To make everything more painful, Enrico was being kissed on the mouth by a woman I didn't recognize, just as he had been kissed by Sarah months before.
If that scene had deeply bothered me at that time, now it was extremely painful. Lindsay tried to awkwardly change the channel, which ended up making the remote control fall from her hurried hands. While she tried to retrieve it, I continued to watch the scene, which seemed to pass in slow motion, both the kiss and what followed it, with Enrico exchanging smiles and looks with the people filming the moment.
"Sorry, Rachel!" Lindsay apologized, finally managing to turn off the TV.
We didn't talk about the "Enrico" issue. I didn't feel prepared to pour out the feelings that were suffocating my throat at that moment, but my determination to be strong spoke louder.
"It's okay."
I couldn't predict it, but that phrase became part of my daily vocabulary.
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