Confession and kisses

Freda’s POV

The beautiful velvet blankets of the huge bed did nothing to calm my restless soul as I tossed and turned in it. I'm going to admit that the bed was way nicer than my bed back at the pack but I still wanted the one at the pack. I eventually conceded defeat since the anxiety kept biting at me and wouldn't go away. I let out a sigh and stepped out of bed to find the cool marble floor beneath my bare feet. At this hour, the castle was quiet, the halls lonely and dark, everyone was asleep except for the guards I could see walking around from the window. I dressed in a robe over my pajamas and wrapped it firmly around my body before silently opening my room's door. I had to admit that the castle looked very lovely at night. The beautiful paintings that decorated the walls and the stone flooring were all harmonized to bring out the beauty of the space.

Moving through the dimly lit halls, the night air felt nearly frigid. Despite the odd contrast with the day's warmth, I was happy with it. Even though I felt like a ghost wandering these old hallways, the cold was a welcome reminder that I was still very much alive. I almost forgot I was walking towards the castle balcony on my floor. The expansive castle grounds, illuminated by moonlight, were visible from the balcony, with the trees softly swaying in the gentle breeze. I went outside and felt the chilly air pierce my flesh through my flimsy robe. I didn't mind, though. I closed my eyes, leaned against the stone railing, and inhaled deeply.

The aroma of the night-blooming flowers that littered the gardens below permeated the crisp, clear air. I allowed myself to temporarily forget everything, including my location and the heavy loads I was carrying. I was simply a young girl, standing in alone and beauty on a balcony. I clung to that rare moment. A slight sound came from below as I stood there alone in the darkness. I scowled as I strained to listen. It was a far-off, gentle tune carried by the wind. A familiar melody that I was unable to locate the source of. I sang along with the song without thinking, the words returning to me as if they were from a dream that had faded. Even though my voice was barely audible, it seemed to fill the quiet of the night. I didn't hear him get closer. I was alone for a moment until a voice startled me out of my trance. "You have a lovely voice." With a gasp, I turned around and saw Damien standing in the doorway, his dark silhouette contrasted with the warm light coming from within.

My pulse raced when I saw him since I hadn't anticipated seeing him here, especially at this hour. As he stepped out onto the balcony, he remarked, "I didn't mean to scare you." Instead of his customary regal garb, he was wearing a basic shirt and sweatpants. He appeared...different, friendlier, almost human.

I managed to say, "It's fine," though my voice was still a little wobbly from the shock. "I didn’t hear you come in." With his eyes locked on the gardens below, Damien rested against the railing next to me. After a little while, he said, "I couldn't sleep. The castle is too quiet at night."

I understood all too well and nodded. "I know the feeling." For a while, we stood side by side in quiet, buried in our own thoughts. This quiet time between us felt odd after all the conflict and uncertainty that had characterised our conversations up to this point. However, I discovered that I didn't mind. Even though I wasn't quite sure I could trust him yet, there was something reassuring about him being here.

Abruptly breaking the silence, he exclaimed, "You're bothered by something. It's evident in your eyes. What are your thoughts?"

I was hesitant to let him in, not sure if I wanted to. However, there was an earnestness in his tone that gave me the impression that perhaps, just perhaps, he genuinely cared. I said, "It's nothing," even though we both knew it wasn't real.

"Freda," he turned to face me and murmured softly. "Not everything needs to be kept within. You are welcome to speak with me." It was difficult to take my eyes off of him because of something in his glance that suggested he wasn't just mouthing the right things to appease me. It was a real curiosity of his. And I found myself yearning to tell him for reasons I couldn't quite put my finger on.

I murmured softly, "I've been bullied before, before I could stop myself back in the pack." Damien's eyebrows knitted together in concern as his countenance darkened. I inhaled deeply as the memories returned. I answered, scarcely raising my voice above a whisper, "Because I'm different. Because I’m not fully… one of them."

"One of them?" Damien spoke again, sounding confused.

With a forceful swallow, I forced myself to go on. "You know I‘m not fully a werewolf, Mum is a human. That is, my biological mother. My dad is a werewolf, you know. They were mates, but my mother fled when she didn't feel welcomed by the pack. That began when my father got married again. The mistreatment. The jeers. I was unable to even shift because I was part human and half werewolf."

With an intense gaze that made my heart hurt, Damien remained mute. At last, he muttered, "I'm so sorry," in a low, sorrowful voice that caught me off guard. "I didn’t know."

I answered, attempting to maintain a steady tone. "It’s not something I talk about often."

"But it's still with you, " he mutely remarked. "I am able to observe it. The suffering. the isolation."

I averted my gaze and blinked away the tears that were about to fall. "It never really goes away," I said in apology. Damien extended his hand and rested it lightly on my shoulder. His touch was unexpectedly warm—comforting even. His tone was hard but sympathetic as he replied, "You do belong here, Freda. You belong with me."

Being unable to believe him, I shook my head. "Damien, I'm not sure how to be the person you want me to be. " With a step closer, he cupped my cheek with his hand and wiped away a stray tear with his thumb. "Being someone else is not required of you. All I want is that. I have only ever desired that." Something changed inside of me for the first time since I was transported to this palace. There was a tiny spark of something I couldn't quite place, and it was there, however faint and nearly undetectable. Perhaps it was hope, or perhaps acceptance was only getting started.

Whatever it was, it was enough to cause me to lean into his touch and temporarily accept the possibility that he might be correct. With his voice just audible over the wind, Damien muttered, "You don't have to be afraid anymore. I'll be here to defend you. All the time."

I could see that he was being sincere, and my barriers started to come down. I didn't feel the need to push him away or keep him at a distance for the first time. Rather, I experienced an unexplained attraction towards him, a bond that I was unable to resist.

I walked closer to him, hesitantly putting my arms around his waist before I could regret it. Almost instantly, Damien wrapped his arms around me, cradling me tightly and placing his chin on top of my head. first I felt I’d throw up, then I felt butterflies in my belly as my legs casually became weak in a funny way.