Her Broken Mate 28

"And so it was. After I overthrew my mother, I became ... Alpha of the pack.
It was scary, but I got tired of ... of being a doormat." Seth finished the narrative of his abuse.

Alfred's eyes were sad, "I am so sorry you had to go through that, Seth. No human or supernatural being should ever have to suffer that much. It must have been painful to go through all that alone."

He shook his head, "No, quite the opposite. Ryan, my beta, told me that soon I would find my ... Mate would be found. He was one ... of the few people who never laid a hand on me, and even protected me from my mother. When I got punched and kicked, he jumped in and stood ... right in front of her and took the blows instead of me."

The doctor nodded and listened to his story with fascination.

He took this as an opportunity to continue his story with a nostalgic smile. "He was not in the pack long, though ... his mate was Emily, a female Beta. Yet he stood up for me, even though he did not know me well. He knew that he ... had to protect me, since he was the second in charge while Emily was with Sarah. I mean, it made sense ... After all, Sarah was out looking for her mate." Then his features darkened, and he closed his eyes briefly. "Then... One day, Mom had enough of Ryan stepping in to protect me. She ordered him - no, yelled at him ... to stop helping me when I was in need. Since she was the Luna and currently the most senior in the pack, he had no choice but to obey her command. The rest ... Is history, because soon I met Sarah."

Silence followed, along with a clearing of Alfred's throat.

"It's extraordinary that you had someone to guide you through this experience, Seth. I think you can start to recover from your trauma with that now." he said, blinking twice.

Seth tilted his head, not understanding how his story could begin his recovery process. "What do you mean ..., Alfred?"

He chuckled and pushed his glasses up. "The cycle of healing is different for everyone. According to my diagnosis, you have PTSD. Also known as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. One of the first steps to getting back on your feet is to talk about it. Which, of course, we just did."

Seth nodded, taking in all the information.

Alfred flipped through the pages on his clipboard, eyes skimming over the words as he continued, "Now we get to phase two.
We are going to work on therapy. You will be introduced to Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing known as EMDR, and, Cognitive Processing Therapy, known as CPT. We will also look at exposure therapy, group therapy, brief
Psychodynamic Psychotherapy, and you may be on antidepressants or other medications."

Seth had no idea what any of this meant.

'It means the same thing, human.' Virus grumbled, puzzled by the vocabulary Alfred had produced.

Alfred looked up from his tablet and tapped on his paper, "I see you are a little confused. Do you want to know what each of them is?"

Seth nodded curtly, "Please."

Alfred breathed in and out and leaned back in his chair. "Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, is an integrative psychotherapy that stimulates the information processing part of the brain. It aims to treat past disorders, current triggers and future triggers. It was originally developed to alleviate the stress of traumatic memories. Cognitive processing therapy, on the other hand, is a form of therapy that trains the brain to think differently about the traumatic experience." he explained, pausing briefly to take a breath.

"And the other forms of therapy?" Seth asked curiously.

"Exposure therapy is designed to make you less sensitive to the fear in your memories.
In group therapy, a group of people who have had a similar experience or diagnosis talk about their history, and you gain insight from that. In brief psychodynamic psychotherapy, you learn how your past trauma may be affecting your present feelings. The family therapy will probably be the most difficult, as I will need to have your abuser and your father present." Alfred finished, gesturing with his hands.

"But... the medications?" he chirped, hoping for good answers, as some medications can greatly affect health.

Of course, the thought of his mother made him feel sick to his stomach, but he ignored the feeling.

The fact that he was not afraid of his mother in the hospital was a spontaneous inspiration. After all, Sarah was in danger and he thought rashly.

He knew he was still afraid of her.

Alfred put a hand to his chin thoughtfully.
"Well, the antidepressants and the other recommended medications will only help improve your sleep, reduce the anxiety you feel on a daily basis, and prevent flashbacks from the traumatic event."

Seth sighed and combed his hand through his hair, having learned so much.

"Any more questions?" asked Alfred, tilting his head.

"No."

Alfred then rises from his chair and smiles, "So, shall we get started?"

He shook his head in disagreement, "No."

Alfred seemed taken aback, his eyes widening as one of his arms dangled to his side.

"No?" repeated Seth, confused as to why he should refuse his offer. Realizing Alfred had misunderstood him, he began to explain his words again. "I ... just don't know when ... I'm going to stay like this. Why ... I ... always talk like this? I assumed werewolves ... heal faster. Especially since... I'm an Alpha."

Alfred's shocked face now turned into a joyful one. "Whew, you gave me a scare there, Seth! The reason you don't speak clearly is because your vocal cords aren't used to it. After you became mute at fourteen, you were still developing puberty. Yes, you've developed your vocal cords to a deeper tone, but they're not used to being manipulated on a daily basis."

He slumped his shoulders, feeling dejected.
"Will ... I ever ... speak normally again?"

Alfred threw a hand in the air to dismiss his question momentarily. "Absolutely. It just takes time, don't worry about it."

Virus barked, tail wagging, 'That means when Sarah wakes up, she can hear our sexy voice all night. I can't wait to hear her scream...'

'VIRUS! Not now! We can't do this to Sarah! What if we accidentally hurt her in the process?!' Seth whispered back to him excitedly.

'Then we'll make sure she ends up with chocolates or a proper dick. Plus, we can spend the whole night building up our stamina to make up for it...'

'And ... that's the last I'll hear from you, my friend. Goodbye.' he cut off the link.

Seth could've sworn his face was slightly flushed.

How could he think of his Sarah in such a dirty way?

He shook his head and refocused when he noticed Alfred waiting for him. Quickly he apologized, "Sorry, Alfred. My wolf is just... thirsty for my mate."

Alfred burst out laughing and nearly rolled over on the ground. "It's all right, I'm like that to my wife sometimes. One morning,
I'd to wake her up with an Italian kiss on her kitten because she'd graciously and skillfully given me a blowjob the night before."

Sighing in annoyance, Alfred turned around.
Back to his professional phase and got straight to the point. He leaned back in his chair and raised his arm a little as his gaze fell on his watch. He read aloud, "6:08 pm. We've until 10:00. Seth, how do you feel about yourself? Do you blame yourself for what happened to you?"

Seth took a deep breath, his heart and mind aching as he thought carefully about his answer.

"I feel ... Like it's ... my fault for how ... everything turned out. If I ... been stronger, maybe ... everything ... turned out differently."

Alfred listened grimly, his finger clicking the pen. "Do you know why I asked you that question, Seth?"

Seth shook his head and made signs of no.

Alfred put his clipboard on the side of the seat and moved his hands as he explained. "Victims who suffer from PTSD blame themselves for the outcome of the ordeal. Which in most cases isn't their fault at all."

Biting the inside of his cheek, he spoke, "It's my ... Blame. You don't understand ... me or what I've ... been through. If you crawled into ... my skin and ... walked around in it, maybe you'll understand."

Alfred raised a brow, "That may be, but one of the reasons I don't understand you is because you don't tell me what I need to know about you."

'We should burn him alive and destroy the evidence afterwards. He's getting on my nerves.' Seth mind-linked Virus.

Virus only mockingly replied, 'Geez, he's just trying to help you. I understand that it's difficult to comprehend something that's been around for so long. But if you really want to heal, you've to want it and make an effort.

Seth sighed and apologized. "I'm sorry, I'm ... not used to it."

Alfred waved his hand dismissively. "It's okay, that's what I'm here for. You don't have to open up right away, and I'm not going to make you. These things take time, and I'm willing to wait, Seth. I apologize for my comment earlier."

They both smiled as they continued the session.

He reached for his clipboard again and flipped through the pages, pausing at one sheet as his eyes skimmed the words.

"Seth..." he began, giving him a tired look. "We're going to ask you to recall the beginning and end of the abuse. This will begin the cognitive processing therapy. Remember I told you that it makes the brain think differently about the trauma?"

This time Seth shook his head vigorously, "No, no, no. Please, I ... don't want to ...
go through that again."

He sat back and waited for Seth to calm down as he began to shake. "I understand that," he said in a softer tone. "But ... you need to get over this trauma. What drives you or gives you a goal in the end to do this?"

Seth immediately stopped trembling, his wolf calmed him down, while his thoughts filled with Sarah.

His Sarah.

Alfred smiled and clapped his hands together in delight, "Who is it?"

"My mate, Sarah. I wanted her to wake up with pride in me, to see how far I have come... and... and.... and... and I wanted to be convinced that I am more than worthy to be by her side," he whispered slowly.

"Then use her as your target. You can do this, Seth. It's painful, but you'll thank yourself for it on the long road ahead." he lectured, slapping his hands together.

Seth blinked and finally agreed.

He had to do this.

Not only for Sarah, but also for himself.

He thought, and waited for the moment to begin.