Chapter 177: I Don't Want You In My Life Anymore
Chapter 177: I Don't Want You In My Life Anymore
Camilla
"Why can't you just fucking love me?" I cried, needing to physically good myself so I didn't pass out from the pain. What did I do to become so undeserving of her attention?
"This is ridiculous," Edward slurred and it only made me hurt more.
There was no hiding the painful shake of my muscles at this point, however both of them seemed so drunk that I doubted they would remember this conversation in the morning. I felt my mind curl in on itself as my stepfather stumbled up from the couch and I wanted to throw up as his eyes met mine. I hated it but I caved and looked away back to my mother.
"Your perfect little husband broke me while growing up and I came back here to give you a chance to apologize yet you still defend him."
"Camilla…."
"Do you not know how scared I always was?" I yelled, cutting whatever she wanted to say off.
"I was scared that he was going to hit me again or lock me in a closet and forget that I was there? Do you not understand how terrified I was that he was going to rape me when I was too weak to fight back?"
I was full on breaking down now but I couldn't care anymore. Everything inside me hurt and I didn't even try to fight off the signs of me beginning to hyperventilate when I felt them coming.
"You always were such an imaginative child." He spits as he walks towards me, my body tightening up as I push my back against the wall.
My hand was already on the dagger in my pocket but I could barely make out his features through the blur of my tears and fright. How could I escape this? I just needed everything to stop.
"Get out of my house!" I heard my mother shout from my side and the tear spilling down my cheeks became a continuous stream.
Did she not just hear a single thing I just said? I am breaking and it is as though I am not even here.
"You heard her," Edward comes close enough that I can smell the alcohol pouring off him but it is his presence that threatens a gag from my throat.
"Leave!"
I felt a part of my brain shut down a little at that, my body still shaking but not being able to associate the emotions to it. I was truly done here. Pushing off the wall, I walked past my stepfather, not letting myself feel anything under the smug sneer of his face. It wasn't until I heard my mother's voice that I stopped, my head slowly moving to where her fingers clutched onto the countertop.
"No," she said, the word rasping as she spoke. It was directed towards me but it was Edward she was looking at.
"I was talking to you, go stay at Steven's place for the next few days and cool off." She said to him.
I was still crying where I stood as my mother moved out of the kitchen and over to the couch, shooting me a half sorry half exasperated look. She wasn't sending him away for me though, she just didn't want to deal with the conflict. There was a long moment where I believed he was going to lash out for the demand but as I continued to hold myself, something flashed before his eyes.
I knew the twins were in the house, ready to step in if anyone tried anything but based on the way he shifted nervously, I almost wondered if it were because of the message my men had sent him. They showed him mercy that night and I had no doubt about it that they would kill him for me the second I gave them the permission.
Power flushed through me at that and I think it was the only thing that kept me standing as the man of my nightmares walked around me. I didn't turn as I heard the door slam shut at his hasty exit nor did I look towards my mother by the couch. My tears had never ceased though and while I felt a weight leave my chest now that Edward was no longer here, nothing was okay.
My heart has shattered and my mind was overwhelmed, understanding that this was goodbye. The next time I see my stepfather will be with his life draining from his eyes and my mother hopefully taking the hint to disappear herself.
Nothing could be the same but I didn't want to be a part of this life anymore. I wanted to be in the arms of my men, the laughter of Nancy and the escape of photography. I haven't been the girl from this city in a very long time and I was sick of pretending there was still something left for me here.
"I don't want you in my life anymore." I sobbed as my head hung in defeat but when I didn't get any response from her, my head snapped up to the woman across from me, the woman who was passed out on the couch from the alcohol and not bothered to entertain my visit any longer.
The sight destroyed what was left of my old self and I felt it as Kate and Avan left to give me my space. I was thankful for it too because I could barely breathe as my mind rested hard against my chest, droplets of tears being blinked from my eyes ajs down to my trembling fingertips. The world around me spun as everything came crashing on top of my body, nausea, grief and despair weighing me down like the chaos of my past.
I didn't know how to break out and with my mother unconscious on the couch, my feet somehow managed to carry me to my childhood room. The reason I have been avoiding the entrapment of those four walls remains the same even after all I have managed to face today but still I forced myself to close the door. I forced myself to grab the pillow and blanket resting on top of the single mattress bed just as I then forced myself to the ground, creating a spot for me to sleep now that the couch wasn't an option.
The hardwood felt like knives against my back as I settled down but the ones stabbing at my heaving chest were way worse. I am going to leave this place in the morning, I knew that for sure but the pain was too consuming to even think about anything other than the reason for my shaking.
My heart was bleeding out slowly with each fallen tear down my face and it scared me because I didn't know how to stop it.
Domenico POV.
I broke my promises and I didn't feel a single ounce of regret for it. I had received a call from Avan some hours ago saying that something was off and I was on the jet within the next fifteen minutes, all three of us were. My heart hasn't stopped racing since my phone rang, actually it hasn't stopped since the second I watched Camila walk through security at the airport some days ago.
I wanted to respect her wishes which is why I exploited the loophole of having the twin's sent out instead to have her back if she needed it but I have still been on edge for the past six say now despite that extra layer of protection. On top of the fact that my brothers and I haven't spoken since our discussion about England, everything has been feeling off since the moment Camilla left. I have missed her so much that it hurts but I could only hope she won't be mad when she finds out we were here to take her back home.
I know about the identity cards and the fact she saw Lucas's name on one of them but the twins made it seem as though it wasn't a revelation for her or anything. Camilla didn't recognize the meaning behind that single name nor the fact it was proof she was unknowingly Brown's. Though relief was the first thing I felt because it meant I could keep her with me for a little longer. It was like the world is giving us constant signs to tell her everything that threatens to break us apart.
I was still angry at Adriano for wanting to let her go but I don't think I had it in me to be too mad. I have never heard my brother admit to loving anybody, not even our own mother but he loves Camilla with all of his heart. I know he does because I do too and it is the only reason I can't let myself be selfish when it comes to her.
The twins were sent out because I knew they could guarantee her safety since we weren't there but I don't think there was anything I could do to protect her beautiful heart from the chaos destined to ensue. She doesn't need to get drunk to escape her mind but she chose it over everything other things she could have done. I wasn't judging her in the least, however it was an observation on top of many others that told me she was slowly breaking too.
Her calls had become forced and not a single one of us has received a goodnight text to tell us she was okay tonight. Nothing was fine here but if our girl was going to hurt, she would at the very least have our arms wrapped around her when she shattered.
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