Chapter 180: He Left
Chapter 180: He Left
Camilla
I don't remember when I fell asleep, but it was the vibration of the plane's sheets meeting concrete that stirred me from unconsciousness. I know my men had obliged when I asked them to take me home, however that didn't muffle any of the pain I began to feel when the second eye opened.
My face was nestled against Domenico's chest while his chin rested on top of my head, his one large arms wrapping around my shoulder. He had held me as I cried last night and he continued to hold me right now, only this time he wasn't alone. Somehow, I just knew it was Gregorio who was spooning me from behind, his leg pressed in between mine as his own arm wrapped around my waist.
I became increasingly aware of how low his hand placemats were on my stomach but like Domenico, he was still very much asleep.
"You are up?" Adriano's gruff voice brought my attention to the corner of the room, his eyes grazing over the three of us curled together on the much too small bed.
Something about his expression was cold, though, almost like he was distant despite being only a small handful of feet away from me.
"Hi," I mumbled on the side of caution, but his usual teasing smile wasn't on his face right now. This felt like Adriano Gregorio first introduced to me at the wedding and it caught me off guard.
"Is everything okay?" I asked, feeling as Domenico stirs a little at my front.
I can see the line of Adriano's jaw harden before he forces himself to let out a breath but I know this wasn't the same person who kissed my hurt hands last night.
"We just landed, I was coming to see how you were doing." He said, his tone not angry yet not exactly happy either.
"There is no rush, I will let you go back to sleep."
I didn't miss the fact that my question remained unanswered but I also didn't try to stop him as he left to go back into the main part of the plane. He wasn't upset with me, I knew that but however in previous times when he was overwhelmed, his natural instinct was to distance himself and leave until he sorted things out on his own.
I hoped it would be difficult this time, I hoped he would come to me instead or at the very least tell me where he was going instead of just disappearing. To be honest, I was too tired right now to let myself worry. There would be plenty of time to do that later but I just wanted a break from feeling sad and complicated. I wanted to savor the heat of Gregorio and Domenico's skin pressed against mine and I did so.
I found comfort in the feeling of their snug embrace around my body and it wasn't long before I felt my mind drifting off once again. The peace of sleep never found me again but Gregorio did, my eye had fallen shut multiple minutes ago but my brain wouldn't quiet now that it had awakened.
I had hoped that a few hours of solid rest would have been enough of a distraction from the raging thoughts inside me, however fifteen minutes of straight restlessness liked to prove otherwise. It seems as though I wasn't the only one to notice this.
While my body had remained half on top of Domenico, it was Gregorio's mouth I felt gently pressing against my bare throat. My eyes instantly fluttered shut as a soft exhale left my lips, his touch soothing me with that simple action.
"I missed you." He said quietly as he moved a little lower, planting another kiss to where my pulse thrummed happily.
I missed him too, I wished the word could come out of my mouth but I was too tired to do anything but urge myself to relax. Sighing, my mind focused on the way his hand slowly moved lower and lower down my back before smoothing up my spine. It wasn't anything more than a lover's touch but it felt like everything as Domenico shifted again beneath me.
No words were spoken as his fingers started to brush through my slightly knotted hair and he continued to rub my back without missing a beat. The two of them managed to gently pull me back into a dreamless rest and this time, it was one I didn't wake from until the following morning.
"Gone," I woke up to the sound of Domenico's smooth voice, my eyes reluctantly opening to find him dressed and sitting on the edge of a bed, Gregorio's bed.
"I am assuming no text?" The latter responded, making me realize my head was resting on a pillow propped on his lap for me.
A soft blanket had been laid over my body at some point as Gregorio's fingers slowly dragged through my hair, the same way Domenico's were earlier on the plane. I had no recollection as to how I got from the plane to this room but it was still mostly dark so I assume it has only been a small handful of hours from when I last drifted off.
"He was gone for ten days last time, I doubt this will be any different." I heard Domenico sigh quietly, his eyes slowly falling down to meet mine before holding it. I watched as a small smile appeared on his face but I saw sadness in his features too.
"Adriano left?" I concluded based on what I heard and the unhappy nod Gregorio gave me confirmed what I had guessed.
His fingers continued to play with my hair as a heavy breath left his body, something I think was distress being etched across his forehead. I had hoped he would have stayed but I wasn't mad that he left. Adriano promised me he would always come back and if some time alone was what he needed to face the demons wrecking his mind, I would give that to him.
He would come back and I would help him through anything if he allowed me the chance to even if it was simply being at his side.
"There is a lot he needs to work out right now but I promise he won't stay gone forever." Gregorio reassured me but it wasn't myself that I am worried about.
"He should have at least texted." Domenico argues and for a moment, we let his words hang in silence.
I knew Adriano better than I think he realized and I knew him distancing himself had both to do with us and everything to do with how he was taught to feel growing up. There was so much none of them have told me but I know Gregorio's need for organization has become he has so little of it as a child just as Domenico didn't have control and Adriano wasn't allowed to show emotions.
It was something I would work on with him, assuming that is what he wants but I don't want Adriano to feel as though he has to disappear every time his past comes out to play.
"You should sleep," Domenico muttered, his voice a whisper against my ear.
Unfortunately, I don't think there was any amount of cuddling that could relax my mind this time. Maybe my body but not the unease that is now coiled tight within my heart.
"Is it late?" I asked, my eyes closing simply because they could as I focused on the way Gregorio's fingers mimicked a soft massage.
The room was fairly dark but I had no doubt the curtains across the floor to ceiling windows were top of the line at doing their job.
"Just past five in the morning." Domenico answered, moving further onto the bed until he was laying on his stomach beside me.
The smell of pine instantly invaded my sense and helped to calm my restless mind, his hand resting on my stomach as he propped his head up right beside Gregorio's legs. My chest feel heavy now that I was fully awake again but they made it better. They made everything better.
With Domenico right beside me and Gregorio beneath me, it was impossible to feel alone, even if a part of me wishes that Adriano accompanied them. I was sad, I knew I was but I also felt as though every minute I have spent with them had slowly been chipping away the part of me l liked to keep bottled up inside. Even now, as my eyes reopen and flick down to where Domenico's hand is resting against my stomach, I am not sucking anything in.
A habit that I have had since I was ten years old is slowly fading away because they taught me I was just as beautiful with scars and curves as I would be without them. No part of me right now wasn't relaxed, apart from potentially my head but I think that I'd kind of given it considering the week I have had. I was admittedly a bit overwhelmed right now, however all of it was balanced by the soft touches and sweet words Gregorio and Domenico were offering.
Things always seemed a little more manageable with them by my side and I am pretty sure it is the only reason I am not hyperventilating anymore.
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