Chapter 89: I Fucked Up
Chapter 89: I Fucked Up
Domenico
"Hey man, where were you?" Gregorio asked, sitting up on the couch and tossing the television remote beside him.
"I got home from the club and you are gone."
Swallowing my frustrations when Adriano looks up at me from cutting the pizza, I walk over to grab some plate.
"I went to speak with Matteo." I said, taking a note of how Adriano stiffened slightly for a reason entirely different from Gregorio's similar reaction.
"Why would you go there?" Gregorio asks, tilts his head and moves to the counter.
"I thought you said you would go back after…." He trails off at.
"You can say her name, it is fine." I said even as my jaw clenched at the reminder of her.
Matteo is the father of my ex fiancee, Disha. She was a really nice woman and we broke up not by my choice. Our relationship was a power move and was constructed primarily by my father. But if she hadn't betrayed me at the last moment, I would very likely be a married man right now against my will.
"I didn't plan to go back there but I needed some information." I said, purposely directing my voice at Adriano and Gregorio picked up on the question in the air.
"What is this all about?" He asked, grabbing the plate from me and bringing them over to the living room couch. I guess it is pizza and television for tonight.
"Ask Adriano." I grumbled, plopping down on the couch as he brought a tray full of sliced pizza enough to feed a dozen.
I wasn't really angry at my brother for his secrecy but we did deserve to know what is going on if Lucas is involved. I allowed him to get seated on the couch beside Gregorio on my left. We all take a moment to grab a slice of the loaded pizza but I have to admit, I am dying to figure out what is going on.
"We found Lucas." He said what I already knew but Gregorio has a very similar reaction to the news as u did, surprised, confused and conflicted.
"We found him in Dubai about two weeks ago and we are currently keeping an eye on him there." Gregorio looked at me in shock before he looked back to the third person.
This is the part I can't figure out, this is information Adriano would leap at telling us so there is clearly something more. He didn't meet either of our gaze and instead, he looked down at the floor in uncertainty.
"I know you have questions, ones you both deserve answers to but I can't say anything else." Disbelief crossed Gregorio's features and mine stayed internal.
"I don't understand why you wouldn't tell us?" George asked, he too is trying to understand what is going on right now.
Adriano stayed silent in thought for a moment before opening his mouth.
"This is much bigger than just Lucas and I need to figure it out myself."
"Since when have you ever needed to go solo?" I asked, using all my knowledge on body language to depict my brother's motives right now but I came up blank every time.
"Because this affects everything." He said and his voice raised before running his hand through the roots of his hair, something I have noticed he does when he is frustrated.
I can tell he is extremely on the edge right now but I can't think of what would make him not want to tell us unless it affects us personally. I am not stupid but that doesn't change the fact that I am truly puzzled right now.
"Are you stressed about Camilla?" I asked, knowing that starting a relationship could be the cause of some of his stress.
While she may not realize it, dating her was a huge step for all of us. We don't date ever but things never became complicated or awkward with Camilla like it has with others. Sure, she herself could be awkward sometimes but it only made me like her more. Besides, it gives me endless opportunities to cause that cute, embarrassed blush to appear on her cheeks.
When Adriano decided at that moment to take a generous sized bite of his pizza, I knew Camilla was a partial reason for his stress but that stemmed from his own personal issues, not her.
"You can't just keep secrets." Gregorio said and the look on his face clearly shows he wants to help out and we mutually agree that we need to get to the bottom of this.
"If it concerns Lucas, we have a right to know. We may be on a break now but this is still our assignment."
"You are off break." Adriano murmured, causing me to narrow my eyes in confusion.
"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked, even though I already know what he was telling us.
Adriano is back in the field.
**********
Adriano POV
I am now off work but neither of the men sitting beside me knows what that quite means.
"What is the assignment?" Domenico asked, not leaving any room for lies or beating around the bush.
"I can't say." That is what I managed to come up with.
I can sense confusion now but if they knew the truth, that emotions would very quickly become replaced by anger.
"Why not?" Gregorio asked and while I feel like I am concealing it pretty well right now, I felt like I am about to explode.
I have always had trouble coping with my emotions and right now is no different. I want to break something, drown myself in alcohol and get myself beaten so hard in a fight that I pass out. Just anything to stop my mind from being so damn loud.
"Why not, Adriano?" He asked again and the familiar feeling of my blood racing took over my body. I am getting angry, not at my brothers, but at myself.
"I fucked up, okay!" My voice comes out as a growl as I drop the remaining of my pizza back on my plate. My appetite is far gone now.
"Been there before." Domenico said as if this is just another typical screw up we all have to bail each other out of.
This wouldn't be the first time we have gotten ourselves into some very stupid shit but if only this time were that easy.
"This is different." I said, feeling myself begin to self-implode.
"I tried to cover something up as a temporary fix and it worked but now I have to get out of this diversion before the outcome of it becomes a reality." I said, speaking in twisted words that I know are only causing them more confusion.
"Talk to us." Domenico said, repeating the same words I had once said to Gregorio many years ago.
I fucking hate that this is creating tension between us but it is better than the alternative. It is better than the truth because it is one that I can't handle. I need to get out of here before I break down.
"I am going to go for a drive." I said, standing up from the couch.
"Like hell you are." Gregorio said, standing along with me with his plate in hand.
I didn't respond to him though, I don't know how I am supposed to handle this but the shitty way is the best way I can think of right now. I need something to calm this restlessness inside me but I worry that no amount of booze or mind numbing pain will be enough this time.
"Adriano, you can't just leave!" Domenico yelled, following me as I walked over to the elevator.
I shouldn't but I can. Neither of them followed me past the metal doors and I felt like an absolute dick as I scanned my hand across the pad and waited for the lock to turn green. The door started closing as my brothers watched me and the only thing I managed to utter was a useless apology before a wall was put between the three of us.
I can't figure how to explain to them what I have jeopardized but the silent hum of the elevator dropped down, allowing me to figure out one thing.
That is why instead of answering the hundreds of questions my brothers deserve to know, I walk out, get into my car and leave to find the one thing I need right now.
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